Higher Ground Tv Show- Season 2
by Abztract Isight
Summary: This story beings after the MORP. Same characters as in the TV SHOW, with some additions of my own. (The entire first Season can be seen on you tube dot com ) (Disclaimer: I do not own the concept of the show, or any of the characters that were part of the original show. This is strictly a fan fiction.) PLEASE LEAVE REVIEWS/comments
1. Chapter 1

**PROLOGUE: This story begins right after the MORP. Sophie and Peter are engaged, but have not set a definite date to get married. The Cliff Hanger gang are all still there, with the exception of Katherine, who graduated. (The entire first Season can be seen on ) (Disclaimer: I do not own the concept of the show, or any of the characters that were part of the original show. This is strictly a fan fiction.)**__

___**The process of awareness, makes real inside the self, an event that already occurred in reality outside**__- an adaptation of a quote by Parkes and Weiss_

CHAPTER #1

Sophie and Peter had two new kids being admitted to Mount Horizon High School. It was more of a sanctuary for troubled teens, than a regular high school. The new students would be arriving at the same time, so Sophie would admit one and Peter the other. Initially Sophie thought it was two boys, but Peter explained otherwise.

"Chris Marvins is actually Christine. Her school records show she's been a pretty good student and had a part time job, until about six months ago. Then she began skipping, doing drugs and drinking. Her parents kicked her out and she's been living with friends. Her sister is the one bringing her to us today."

"And who's the other one?" Sophie asked her fiancé and the director of Mt. Horizon.

"Mark White. He's an average student and decent athlete. Recently he has been getting into a lot of fights, was found with weed and comes to school drunk. His mother is driving him here." Peter said reading from a file in his hand.

"Since Kat graduated, do you want Christine to be part of the Cliff Hangers?"

"Yes that would work. And Mark can be part of the Ridge Runners."

Daisy knocked on Peter's office door. "The new kids are here."

"Thanks Daisy, we'll be right out," Sophie said. She picked up one of the files, "I'll take Mark I guess."

Peter nodded and followed her outside. "Welcome to Mount Horizon, I'm Peter Scarbrow."

"I'm Veronica and this is Christine."

He looked at the teenager and she avoided his eyes. "Well if you two follow me, we can get Christine checked in."

"If there are any problems contact me. Our parents want nothing to do with her. They've given up. Last week I found her choking on her own vomit, so drunk she could've died. I just don't know what to do any more. I'm a high school teacher and this place was recommended, due to your curriculum and councellors."

"All the kids attend regular classes, have chores to do and we have sports they have to participate in. Between that, we have group and individual counselling sessions," Peter explained.

Veronica looked at her sullen sister, "sounds just like what she needs."

The paper work was signed and completed, then a fellow counsellor took Christine to see the doctor and search her stuff for contraband. Peter shook Veronica's hand and watched her leave. Once done with the doctor, Peter went over the school's rules with Christine. She nodded that she understood, but didn't say a word.

Daisy walked by and Peter asked her to show Christine around. "Okay no problem, that's better than chopping wood."

Peter smiled and added, "since Kat graduated, Christine will have that bunk and be joining the Cliff Hangers."

"Oh joy," Daisy said. Then she lead the new girl away, beginning the tour.

On the way to the dorms they came across David, who of course flirted with them. He walked behind Christine, checking her out and she practically jumped out of her skin.

"Who's the spaz?" David asked, laughing at the new girl.

"This is Christine, she's now part of the Cliff Hangers."

"More like the Cliff Fallers if she's in the group," he chuckled and continued on his way.

"Ignore him, he can be a jerk sometimes." Daisy said as she lead the way inside the dorm.

After the tour was done, Daisy introduced Christine to the rest of the Cliff Hangers by the equipment shed. Peter joined them. "Everyone get changed, we're going to go for a run before diner."

They all rolled their eyes, even Scott. The girls went to their dorm and the guys to theirs. Everyone changed and regrouped by the shed, where Peter stood waiting. He made them do stretches to get limbered up and then they started off down the path. At first it was a slow jog. Peter was in the lead, followed by Scott and then Augusto. Shelby and Juliette ran side by side, followed by Daisy, David and Ezra. Christine came last, so that she didn't have anyone behind her. When they got to a wider path, she sped up, sick of almost stepping on Ezra. She ran beside Scott and Augusto, easily keeping up. Augusto dropped back, but ran behind Scott, so Christine was still comfortable with the formation.

"The last mile, we'll race back to the shed. Winner doesn't have to do their chores tonight," Peter said as he picked up speed.

That caused the boys to kick into overdrive. But that meant David was right behind Christine. She didn't like his hostile vibe, it scared her. Christine bolted, not even Scott could keep up with her. Peter thought she might be running away, but she stayed on the path. He wondered if she just hated chores or if she was really competitive. Her file did say she ran for track and field. When everyone caught back up to her, she was done stretching. She stood with her back to the wall of the shed.

"I can't believe the new girl beat you Scott," Augusto teased, as he bent over to catch his breath.

"What are you, some kind of track athlete?" Scott asked Christine.

She shrugged, still saying nothing. Peter grinned, "she use to do the long distance runs."

Ezra finally arrived to join the rest of them, "so she'll give him a run for his money."

Everyone groaned. Shelby nudged him, "do you really have to be that cheesy?"

"Go on guys, get cleaned up for diner." Peter watched them disperse. He noticed that Christine waited until she was the last to leave. He saw Sophie, "hey wait up!"

"Hi Peter, just get back from a jog?"

"Yup, what about you? How's Mark adjusting?"

"He seems to be doing okay. He's made friends with the group already, well the girls anyway." Sophie explained. "But no contact with the other guys."

"Some take longer than others to adjust, we all know that. Any idea what's for diner?"

"Sheppard's Pie I think."

The kids were lining up to get their food, sliding their trays along the line. Once Chris had her tray filled with all the required food groups, she sat down. She was in the middle of eating, when David came by. He put his hand on the back of her neck.

"So what's for diner babe?"

Chris jumped out of her chair and spun around to face him, "don't touch me. DON'T EVER TOUCH ME AGAIN!" She shouted.

"Chill out Spaz!" David said. He reached for her arm.

"Leave me ALONE!" Chris said and bolted.

Shelby rolled her eyes, "why'd you go and freak out the new girl? If she runs, we all have to do toilets."

David became hostile, "I didn't do anything. I was just being friendly. I didn't know she was nuts."

Daisy, Shelby, Scott, Ezra, Augusto and Juliette all went to find the girl. David sat down and ate his food. They spread out, not sure if she ran into the woods or was hiding in one of the buildings. Ezra, Augusto and Juliette went to check the ground by the tree line. The other three went to check the dorms and buildings. She wasn't in the shed, or by the wood pile, so they went to search the dorms.

"Shelby, tell Scott that she's in here," Daisy called out from their dorm.

The girls walked into their dorm, while Scott waited outside until they said it was ok for him to come in. The new girl was crammed between the wall and a bed. She had her head on her knees and she was hugging them to her chest.

"Scott move the bed a bit, so we can get closer," Shelby suggested.

He did as asked. "What's wrong with her?"

"None of us know, she won't talk. What she said to David was the most we've heard out of her."

Daisy added, "she's broken like the rest of us."

Shelby sighed, "I'll go tell the others to stop looking for her."

Daisy moved towards the girl, "hey remember what I said, David is an ass. Just ignore him."

Scott crawled across the bed to get closer. Chris saw him coming and started screaming. She didn't know she was screaming, in her mind all she was doing was saying "no".

Both Scott and Daisy jumped back. "Scott go get Peter, fast."

Scott ran out the door, almost taking out Shelby and the others in process. "She's freaking out, help me find Peter."

Everyone split up to find either Peter or Sophie. Scott and Augusto found Peter at the same time. Augusto filled Peter in on what happened with David and Scott explained what was happening in the dorm. They jogged back to the dorm.

"Okay the rest of you go back to diner. Thanks for coming to get me," Peter said to the Cliff Hangers, as they had all returned. Then he went inside.

Daisy saw Peter and explained. "As soon as we backed off, she stopped screaming."

"Thanks for trying to help her. I've got it from here, you can go finish diner now."

Peter cautiously approached the distressed girl, like she was a wild animal backed into a corner. "Christine you're safe here. You can talk to me." When she didn't respond, he just talked in a calm voice. He described activities they did at the school and up coming athletic competitions. When he noticed she had stopped rocking, he asked her directly, "Christine would you like to finish diner?"

She responded almost at a whisper. "My name is Chris. Christine died when my soul did."

"Chris let's go to diner," Peter repeated using the requested name. He stood up and held out his hand.

Without accepting his hand, she stood up. He lead her outside and she followed. They walked across the courtyard and into the dining hall. Almost everyone had already finished and cleaned up. Her plate was where she left it. She sat down and returned to eating.

Peter found the other Cliff Hangers by the fire place, hanging out on the couches. "Once Chris is done eating, we are having a group meeting to discuss respecting personal space." He left them alone for the time being.

On the way to group they finally all heard Chris talk. "Don't touch me and we'll all get along just fine."

David under his breath said, "whatever you say Spaz."

Chris heard and before anyone could respond she stopped right in front of him. She drew an invisible circle around her, "this is my space and unless you're invited, stay out of it. Because next time I won't run and you'll regret it."

"Is that a threat?" David challenged.

"No that's a fact." Chris turned her back on him and continued walking again, trying to appear tough.

Everyone except Daisy clapped. Shelby grinned, "she just bitch slapped you, without touching you. I like her."

They all sat down in the circle of chairs, but once again Chris remained mute. She observed the others interact with each other and Peter. From what was said she determined that the blond named Shelby had been sexually abused. Juliette the brunette had issues with her mom that cause an eating disorder. The tall blond guy, Scott, had been raped by his step mom. Augusto, also known as Auggie came from a gang and had dyslexia. Daisy was just plain morbid and her parents were drunks. Ezra had a crush on Daisy, but he also had parental issues and tried to kill himself using drugs. David was an antagonistic jerk, which had to do with his dad being a military General and bully. They were all damaged some how. They'd been at the high school a while. Shelby and Scott were a couple, Auggie and Juliette were an item too, Daisy liked David, for some unknown reason. Chris was the outsider and that's the way she intended to stay. Friendships meant you had to feel something. She needed to stay numb. Otherwise she'd mentally break and she couldn't handle that, not here.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you; they're supposed to help you discover who you are."**__- Bernice Johnson Reagon_

CHAPTER #2

Chris settled in to the routine with the other Cliff Hangers. She liked the outdoor activities and did okay with school stuff, except math. Everyone found out she was good at art. But socially, Chris mainly kept to herself. At night it was a whole different kind of problem. Her nightmares became worse and worse, until they began to wake the other girls up. This went on for a few weeks. Then after a particularly bad one, the girls of her dorm ratted her out to the counsellors. Sophie had to physically wake Chris, to make the nightmare break. Chris came awake fighting, mid scream.

Sophie had her in a bear hug, "you're okay Chris. You're safe."

When Chris finally calmed down, Sophie took her to the main lodge so the other girls could go back to sleep. "Do you want to talk about your dream?"

Chris shook her head negatively. She sat in a chair, knees drawn up to her chest, hugging herself and rocking. This is how she remained, even after Sophie fell asleep. She had to stay awake, or the nightmare would return. In the morning, she watched the counsellor stretch and glance her way, realizing she had fallen asleep herself. Seeing that Chris was still there, relief flooded her face.

"Did you sleep at all?"

Chris nodded no.

"Go on and change. Join the rest of your group for breakfast," Sophie instructed. She went to go find Peter and fill him in on what had happened. "Chris has been having violent nightmares. The other girls have covered for her until last night. She was screaming and once I woke her up, she didn't go back to sleep."

Peter nodded. "We have a group session today, maybe we'll explore dreams in it."

"Good luck getting her to talk," Sophie sighed.

Peter hugged his fiancé, "she'll open up eventually. They all do in their own time."

"How are the sessions with Shelby?"

"She's been able to talk about what happened at home. But she still won't say what happened on the street."

Sophie nodded. "When does she go to court?"

"That's not for a few months still. She'll be ready and we'll be with her every step of the way." Peter said. "Her sister is seeing a shrink back at home. Shelby says it's working, but being in that house doesn't help. Depending on what happens in court, Mount Horizon might be able to get custody of Jessica."

"I hope that Jess can be enrolled here too. Sometimes I just want to punch that mother."

"How's Mark?"

"Mark has been doing well in the group sessions, but won't open up one on one. I still get the impression he's hiding something. The girls think he might be gay, but he hasn't given any indication that he is."

"It would explain his past behaviour. Especially if he hasn't accepted who he is yet," Peter analysed.

They continued discussing the children in their care. Then about the over night hike the Cliff Hangers were going on that weekend. "Remember when we had them do that essay about five things they fear?"

"Yes. I think Shelby put down heights as one, spiders as two and loneliness as three," Sophie recalled.

"Right, they all listed something to do with their lives and then some of the more standard fears. Maybe overcoming some of the smaller fears, will help them face the bigger ones. This could really help Chris open up too."

"So did any common fears come up?" Sophie asked.

Peter looked at a few papers on his desk. "Shelby, Juliette and Ezra listed spiders as a top three fear. Daisy and David listed heights and falling as part of their top five fears. Scott and Auggie listed drowning and loosing their sight."

"So you're going to drown them?" Sophie teased.

He rolled his eyes. "I think once we reach the plateau on the mountain, I'll rope off the area and then blind fold them all. We'll do a listening exercise. Then see how it goes from there."

"The Ridge Runners are doing their solos this weekend too. Clair said they're leaving friday afternoon."

"Busy weekend. At least you won't have to handle any new admittances, while we are gone," Peter advised.

"Even if we did, Jeff and I can handle it."

He hugged his fiancé and gave her a kiss, "never doubted you."

When Peter told the Cliff Hangers about the camping trip, everyone was excited, except for Chris, Ezra and David. The others in the past wouldn't have enjoyed it, but since they'd coupled up, some time alone would be appreciated. Peter couldn't watch them all at the same time, so they could plan secret rendezvous at night. Chris use to love camping and the out doors. But with these nightmares, everyone would be woken up in the tents.

For their group session they talked about their dreams. Chris claimed she didn't remember what happened, but Daisy called her out on that lie. "You wouldn't try and stay awake, if you didn't remember what your nightmares were about."

Chris felt cornered and started fidgeting. She knew something had to be said. "I re-live stuff. I dream in colour and it's very vivid. It's like a movie almost and I can't escape."

Peter was impressed with how much Chris said in group. Daisy had a way of saying the right thing. "What about you Daisy, what do you dream about?"

"Well Peter, I dream about sugar plums," she said sarcastically.

The group snickered. Before he lost their attention he instructed, "for the trip this weekend I want you all to write your feelings in these journals. You can keep the journals afterwards or hand them in. The choice is yours."

"I knew there was a catch, some kind of homework," Ezra complained.

That ended the group session and they went to do their assigned chores. Chris, Daisy and Juliette were joining two members from the Sun Dogs washing dishes in the kitchen. Chris didn't mind drying, but hated the washing. The food chunks grossed her out and made her gag.

"Why are you making those noises?" Daisy asked.

"The food chunks remind me of puke."

Daisy laughed, "then don't put your tent near Juliette's. She's bulimic."

Juliette frowned, "I haven't barfed in ages. That's not fair Daisy."

The two girls bickered back and forth. Until Chris had enough. She told them a story about her barfing. "I hate barfing. The feeling of the chunks coming out. I drank so much once I had it coming out of my mouth and nose. My sister found me choking and helped clear my airway. She thought she was saving my life."

The whole kitchen got silent. Then Clay from the Sun Dogs asked, "what do you mean 'she thought she saved your life'. She did, you would have choked to death on your own vomit. It's the rock star way to go."

Juliette understood. "She means that inside she's dead. Just like the rest of us."

That shut everyone up as they reflected on their own problems. All that was heard in the kitchen for a good while was the clank of dishes. Eventually Juliette said, "when I came here I did barf, but I'm doing much better now. So don't worry about the camping."

Chris nodded once again retreating in silence. She didn't talk again until just before bed time. "When do we leave for this camping trip?"

Shelby answered, "Peter said not until Saturday morning. Tomorrow afternoon he will give us our list of what to pack." Then to the rest of the girls she added, "I vote we gag her, so we can't hear her scream. That way we get one night of sleep."

"She's kidding, relax." Daisy said to Chris and throwing a pillow at her friend.

The lights went out and Chris closed her eyes. She tried to think about things that made her happy. Sometimes that worked and she could prevent the nightmare from coming. She hoped it worked or the other girls just might really gag her.

Friday morning came, without Chris having woken up her dorm mates. They got showered and changed before heading to breakfast. Then they had regular classes. In history, Jeff praised Chris for an excellent essay and the highest mark in the group.

Auggie approached her after class, "I'm dyslexic and Jules helps me a lot. But maybe you can too for the next assignment."

"Sure," Chris said. Then to Juliette, "considering you help Auggie and do your own essay too, that's a great grade."

"Thanks. I don't mind helping him. He's very smart, it just doesn't translate on paper so well."

He blushed under his girlfriend's praise and it was not missed by Chris. "Your graffiti style art is awesome. Anyway you two help me with math and I'll help you with english and essays."

"Deal," Auggie and Juliette said in unison.

The rest of the day was like any other, until Peter had a one on one session with Chris. He wanted to see how she would be with the overnight camping. "Have you been camping before?"

She nodded. "With my parents as a kid."

"Your sister mentioned that both of you were introduced to the outdoors early in life."

"My dad had a sailboat, we spent every weekend camping and sailing."

Peter probed further, "sounds like your parents gave you a good childhood."

"They were the best back then, but I'm not a kid and they don't care anymore. They're dead to me."

He next asked about the ranch. "So the ranch you were living on, was it horses or cattle?"

"We did trail rides for city people. The ranch took me in, when I got kicked out. Time stood still there."

Peter was impressed that she was even talking, but he wanted her to open up more. "They gave you alcohol, you're a minor."

"They didn't give me anything, I took it. They didn't punish me for it, as long as I paid them back. The ranch manager watched my back. His douche bag friend tried to get into my pants when I was passed out once. He chased him away."

"Were you sexually involved with any of them?"

"I did things," she admitted. "I did what I wanted, when I wanted. I wasn't forced." Her tone became hostile, she was ready to defend her friends.

Peter backed off. Changing the subject to more neutral ground. "So you can ride horses?"

"I'm okay of a rider. Some of the horses were boarded at the ranch. One of those people, who owned a beautiful palomino, said once that I had natural talent." Chris relaxed, since he wasn't asking her too personal of a question. "I use to be scared of the spirited horses, like arabians. Because of the ranch I'm not scared anymore, I respect them, but I have the control."

"So not having control scares you?"

"I guess." She paused and blurted, "I'm scared of feeling helpless." Then just as quickly added, "and spiders, sharks and heights."

He didn't push her any further, but was pleased that she had shared as much as she had. That one on one session revealed to Peter, a lot more than Chris thought. It had been the most she had spoken since she'd come to Mount Horizon. The camping trip might be just what was needed, to have her confront her fears.

"Okay you can return to doing your homework," Peter said to end the session.

"I'm done my homework already."

"Even math?"

She rolled her eyes and dragged herself out of the door, "except that." Chris rejoined her group who were sitting at tables doing homework. Auggie and Juliette tried to explain the problem solving section, but she still didn't get it. "Anyone else here, good at math?"

Shelby grinned, "Scott is. Come sit down, let's make a deal."

"I hate problem solving. Algebra is okay, but this crap…" Chris sighed dramatically.

"Tell you what. Scott and I will help you with math, but you give us your notes from english."

"Hey wait how did I get roped into this?" Scott complained.

Shelby gave I'm a pointed look and he shut up. "Is it a deal?"

Chris handed over her notes and opened up her text book. "Who cares about point A car and point B car. If they meet in the middle, then they'll have a nice car accident."

Sophie heard her and said, "that's not the answer it's looking for."

Scott snickered and whispered, "give it up, you'll still have to do the work."

"Here you need this formula to find the answer," Shelby pushed her binder towards Chris.

So began their information exchange. Chris didn't realize it, but she was developing friendships, due to her need to finish her homework. This evolved the next day, when she helped Ezra on the hike into the forest. He was lagging behind and hence making them constantly have to catch up. She took his pack over, to help with his balance, as they walked along a downed tree, over a creek.

"Thanks for the help," Ezra said. He glared at David's back.

"You're better than him. Boyfriends are a dime a dozen, it's real friends that are hard to find and keep." Chris said softly.

"Do you have a friend like that back home?" Ezra asked.

"Yes, his name's Mike. He saved my life after the first time. I didn't tell him about the second."

"The first and second what?" Ezra asked confused.

"Nothing, never mind." Chris realized she'd revealed too much and walked ahead of him for a while.

Peter had overheard their conversation and hoped she wasn't talking about her suicide attempt. He'd have to keep a closer eye on her. As they got to a clearing, Peter checked the sky and then his watch. It was time to make camp. "Ok everyone, set up your tents. I need two volunteers to find firewood, two to get the fire going, two to get water from that creek and the remaining two get diner started."

Shelby and Scott volunteered to get fire wood, Auggie and Juliette were on water, David and Daisy would get the fire started, so that left Ezra and Chris to prepare diner. Peter was aware that the two couples that were on water and firewood would try to get closer, so he gave them a few minutes before searching them out.

"Do we have to do the dishes too?" Chris asked.

"Yup."

"Next time I'm volunteering to start the fire," she replied.

Before Peter could catch them making out, the two couples returned. Scott and Shelby had plenty of wood. Auggie and Juliette worked together to carry the bucket of water. Peter handed out the canned veggies and drinks, then Chris and Ezra gave everyone buns and hot dogs.

They played a game after diner was done, dishes were cleaned and put away. "For every letter of the alphabet, name an animal. I'll start," Peter said, "anteater."

They went around the circle, listing off animals. When they got to "i" it was Christine's turn.

"Icelandic Horse," she said.

David shook his head, "that's cheating."

"Fine then, Iguana." She said with a little hostility.

"Keep it friendly guys. It's just a camp fire game," Peter cautioned.

Chris didn't like David and wasn't sure why he always antagonized her. There was something dark about him, like he could turn on you at any second. It's why she ignored him as much as possible. She stepped away from the fire, getting her flashlight. Then she went into the forest to pee. The time alone, helped calm her down. As she returned to the camp fire, everyone was getting ready for bed. Tomorrow morning would come quickly. She tripped on a root and bumped into Daisy.

"Sorry."

Before Daisy could reply, David whispered near her ear, "watch it Spaz."

Chris spun around and growled, "back off."

David grinned nastily, but gave her space. "Good night Daisy."

Once inside her tent, Chris took some deep breaths. It helped calm her beating heart and help her sleep. She had noticed that the other tents were spaced further away from hers. Word had already got around that she had loud nightmares. Only Peter had his tent close to hers. She hoped to prove them all wrong and not have a nightmare. With that hope in mind, she closed her eyes.

…_His hands were around her neck, forcing her to open her mouth. She tried to scream…._

Peter had the zipper of the tent down in seconds, flashlight shining on Christine's face. She was having a nightmare and screaming "NO!"

"Chris wake up! You're safe!" Both Peter and Shelby shouted.

"What's going on?" Asked Scott, still half asleep, poking his head out of his tent.

Juliette rubbed her eyes, "Chris is having another nightmare. I need ear plugs."

Chris jolted awake, she saw Shelby and realized what had happened. "I'm sorry. I guess you wish I were dead."

Peter took charge, "everyone else back to bed. Chris come sit by the fire with me."

The others whom had come out of their tents at the commotion, returned to them. Chris grabbed her sleeping bag and put it around herself. She looked at her watch, she'd managed to sleep three hours, which was better than usual. "It's okay Peter, I will just stay up and keep the fire going. I won't sleep anymore."

"How about you talk to me about your dream. What has you so scared?"

She hugged herself, but it wasn't from the cool night air. "I… I can't. I just can't."

He tried something else. "I heard you tell Ezra earlier that your best friend Mike helped you once. How did he do that?"

"He told me to write it down, if I couldn't talk about what happened. For a long time I was the living dead. Daisy would have loved me back then," Chris said.

"Would it help writing it in a journal now?" Peter asked.

She shook her head. She wanted so badly to trust him, to tell him why she had nightmares. Even with Mike's help, she still couldn't get rid of the bad dreams. "I'm scared to tell you what happened."

"Why are you scared to tell me?" He asked the obvious.

"Same reason I never told my parents or my sister. Because you'll look at me differently; either with pity or disgust."

"I think you'll see that it won't be either. Come on try me."

"I can't. I just can't." She got up and went back into her tent, shutting him out. She could lie awake until morning.

He let her go, there was no use in pushing her for more. He added fuel to the fire and then returned to his own tent. Morning would soon arrive and he had a feeling the blind fold exercise would bring some interesting developments.

As the day got lighter, the forest animals got louder. Chris was still awake. She'd gone for fresh water, added fuel to the fire and was in the process of making pancakes on the skillet. Peter woke up to that smell.

"Good morning," he said to Chris. He could see from the dark circles under her eyes that she had not gone back to sleep. "Thank you for starting breakfast. I'll keep making the pancakes, if you want to wake the others."

Chris handed him the spatula and then went tent to tent. She shook the tent and then yelled, "rise and shine camper!"

"Go away Spaz," David groaned.

"Everyone up, come on people," Peter encouraged.

Chris got an evil grin on her face and winked at Ezra. "Oops, I just tripped." She kicked out the pegs that held David's tent together, then as she stood back up, pulled out a pole.

"What the f….," David swore as the tent fell on top of him. "You did that on purpose!"

Ezra grinned and mouthed to her, "thanks for making my morning." Then he added much more loudly, "I saw her, she legit tripped, it was an accident. Anyway we have to tear down and pack up today."

The others not wanting the same treatment, came out of their respective tents. They then smelled the fresh pancakes and grabbed plates to eat. "Thanks Peter," Scott said.

"Thank Chris, she made the first batch."

Shelby grinned, "didn't sleep again eh? Mmm… these are good."

"Look even Twig is having seconds," Auggie teased Juliette.

Chris nodded, picking up a pancake and shoving the whole thing in her mouth. This way she didn't have to talk.

"So Peter, what are we doing today?" Daisy asked.

"Facing our fears," Peter replied.

"Why would I want to do that?" David groaned.

"Because it can show you who you really are, right Peter?" Daisy said sarcastically. "Or if you can conquer the small fears, you can overcome the big ones."

"That's some pretty good psychotic babble," Juliette said.

Shelby and Daisy smirked, as they laughed at the girl's verbal mistake. They finished eating and helped each other take down their tents. Scott helped Auggie, after he packed his own tent. Chris helped Ezra, who was getting tangled in the lines of the cover.

"Okay gang, let's tear down camp and get going. We've got a bit of a hike and then we'll be at our destination."

The fire was extinguished, the dishes were packed and they headed out. Peter lead the way. David picked on Ezra as they walked. "Ezzie's fear is that he'll never get laid."

Chris waited until Peter was out of ear shot and then said, "and you fear that size really does matter. That being small is not just an issue with your brain, but also with your other head."

Juliette gasped at the rude innuendo, Shelby and the other guys laughed. "Ouch, dude, don't mess with her or her friends."

Chris grinned, but she could feel the daggers of hate radiating off of David. She was pushing him and knew it. Part of her loved the danger and wanted him to come at her, just so she could prove to herself she wasn't afraid of guys like him. The other part of her was uncomfortable, with the possible confrontation. But all she had to do was look at Ezra's grateful expression, to know she'd stick up for him again. She hated bullies and that is exactly what David was.

The rest of the way, David stuck to Daisy's side and left Chris and Ezra alone. Scott and Shelby walked at the end of the group, holding hands. Auggie and Juliette had caught up to Peter and were chatting about random things. Soon they arrived at the clearing.

"Okay, everyone can take a break while I rope off this area." Peter tied a rope to one tree and walked in a circle on the outside, until he returned to the starting point. "Take your packs off and leave them on the outside of this rope. Next come to me and get one of these blind folds."

"Let me guess, the fear of being blind or out of control?" Daisy mused.

"Correct. Everyone go stand in the middle, back to back. Now put the blind folds on," Peter instructed. "Shelby walk two steps forward and four paces left. That's it, okay stop. Scott take four steps forward and two paces right."

Peter continued until they were all spread out, too far to reach out and find each other. Then he got completely silent and waited to see what happened. First they called out to him, when he didn't answer they tried to find each other. When that failed, panic set in. He saw Chris breathing heavily.

"Everyone sit down and shut up," Daisy said.

Ezra, Chris, Shelby and Scott did as she said. The others wandered aimlessly. David stopped when he found the rope. Auggie tripped over his own feet and stayed down. Juliette freaked out when she couldn't hear anyone else. Finally she too sat down and just cried silently.

"Calm down and listen. Peter is still here, he's messing with us."

Scott didn't like being blind, he hated the feeling of not knowing what was going on. But he did as she said. It took him a while, for his breathing not to drown out the sounds around him. He heard Juliette crying. He also heard the snapping of twigs to the right of him. Either it was Peter or a bear. If it was a bear, he could run faster than everyone, except maybe Chris. As he picked apart his feeling of fear, analyzed it, he calmed down. Scott eventually realized his other senses got heightened, when he lost his sight. He could smell Shelby's shampoo, when it drifted by on the light breeze. He was no longer scared, so he lay back, hands behind his head, to relax.

"Scott take your blind fold off and stand outside the circle," Peter instructed when he saw that the fear had been conquered. "Shelby and Auggie can do the same."

In passing Auggie said, "come on Jules, you can do this. You know I wouldn't leave you behind."

That comment was all Juliette needed to stop crying. When she did that, she calmed down. She reminded herself she wasn't helpless and used the tools that Peter and Sophie had taught her. When she smiled, Peter let her join the others on the sideline.

David, unknown to Peter, had found a way to peak out under his blind fold. When he marched military style up to Peter, he too could take off the blind fold. So that left just Chris. She could sit there for hours, as long as no one came near her. She already had hypersensitivity. Being blind was not one of her fears.

Everyone watched Peter approach Chris from behind her back. Shelby said under her breath, "that's a bad idea."

"Chris it's Peter. It's just me. I want you to trust me to come up behind you and remove the blind fold."

"NO."

"You can do it. Just listen to me talking and know that I won't hurt you. Trust me, not to hurt you." Peter kept talking until he was two feet away from Chris.

She sat frozen and stiff, waiting to spring away if he did try and hurt her. He kept talking, telling her to breath slowly with him. She could feel him behind her, she was scared. If he wanted to, he could hurt her very badly.

"He's going to end up with a black eye," Daisy said dryly.

"Would the Peanut Gallery please stay quiet," Peter called out. Then returned to talking to Chris. "I am going to crouch down behind you and put my hand on your shoulder. You are going to be okay."

Chris knew he was forcing the trust issue. She had to trust him. Weighing the pros and cons, helped. She focused on how calm he was, how his vibe didn't come across as threatening. So when he put his hand on her shoulder, she didn't freak out.

"How do you feel?'

"I'm not scared of you any more. But I'm still tense," Chris said honestly.

"Do you trust me?"

She just nodded yes. So he took off the blind fold. She stood up and turned to look at him, her eyes adjusting to the sudden light. "One fear semi-over come. Trusting you is a little easier than trusting others."

That gave Peter an idea. "Everyone come here and line up in single file. Chris stand right here and put your blind fold back on." He waited until they did as he said. "We are going to test Chris. I want you all to walk up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder, say who you are and then go stand over there."

Ezra said, "this is definitely not a good idea. She's going to knock someone out."

David grinned, "it won't be me, hopefully it's you Ezzie."

"Everyone stay quiet until you are behind Chris." Peter motioned for Daisy to begin the exercise.

Chris could feel that the person approaching her was not hostile. The weight of the hand on her shoulder, told her it was one of the other girls. She smiled when Daisy spoke. Next came Ezra, then Shelby who's shampoo she smelt. Juliette she identified by the light perfume she always wore. Auggie came up and touched her shoulder, with no incident. Chris had not recognized him. When it was Scott's turn, even though Chris didn't feel a threat, she was a little more agitated. She felt a sexual undercurrent from him. That made her nervous, even though she knew he loved Shelby and it wasn't directed at her. Grinning maliciously, David purposely waited until he was last. He didn't like Chris, especially since she always ran interference for Ezra. He walked up behind her as instructed, taking longer than the others had, on purpose.

Through the process of elimination Chris determined it was David behind her. She knew that Peter was right beside her and wouldn't let any harm come to her. Still she could feel his vibe. He was dangerous, everything in her screamed to get ready to fight. Even though she couldn't see him, she turned her head towards Peter. She had to trust him to protect her. Peter saw the head movement and how her fists were clenched.

David dropped his hand heavily on to Chris's shoulder. "Hi Spaz, it's David." He expected her to spin around and punch him, but she didn't move. Not getting the reaction he desired, angered him further.

"Good work Chris, you can take off your blind fold. Alright we're done here, Auggie can you take down the rope. Everyone else grab your packs. We're going to the rope course."

Chris looked at Ezra, "what's the rope course?"

"It's like a rope bridge up in the trees. You walk on one rope, holding on to two others until you make it to the other side."

"Peter is this pick on Chris day? Seriously first I have to face my fear of people coming up behind me and now heights. Do you have a container of spiders to dump on me too or maybe a shark tank?"

"You're not the only one with fears to face today. And for the record, no I don't have spiders or sharks," Peter clarified.

"I like spiders and sharks," David said.

Ezra rolled his eyes at Chris, "figures he would."

"Did you say something Ezzie?"

Ezra didn't reply. But Shelby did, "just shut up David, no one wants to hear your voice."

Daisy decided to intervene, "I don't like heights either, but after the climbing wall at least I'm not scared anymore."

"When you confront your fear, it looses it's hold on you. The control is yours," Peter explained.

"Confront my fears… right. Let's add falling off a rope up in the trees to my list," Chris grumbled.

Scott grinned, "relax. You're in a harness, that has a safety line attached. If you fall it holds you in place, so that you can get back on the rope. And you'll be wearing a helmet so if the safety line breaks your head will be fine."

Peter sighed, "Scott you're not helping."

Eventually they arrived at the rope course. They took a break and had lunch. Then Peter got out the harness and Daisy went first. David had no problem and beat Auggie's time to cross the rope bridge. Ezra was slower, but made it across. Scott made it look easy. Then it was Shelby's turn.

"I know you hate heights too Shelby, but last time I let you get away with not doing the task. This time you don't have that option." Peter checked the harness and that her helmet was done up.

"You can do it Shelby. One step at a time," Daisy encouraged.

"Look at the rope and not at the ground," Ezra suggested.

Scott made eye contact with her and said, "come on Shelby, it's not far. I'm right here waiting for you."

She took a deep breath and stepped out on the rope, holding tight to the guide lines. The rope swung a little and she stopped moving. Fear was paralyzing her, but she was already up there, so she took another step. Once she had the hang of it, Shelby made it all the way across, hugging the tree at the end.

Everyone cheered, "way to go Shelby!"

"Come on down Shelby and we'll get the harness off you. Good job," Peter praised.

Once on solid ground, Scott took Shelby into his arms for a comforting hug. Then everyone looked at Chris expectantly.

"Come on Spaz. Or are you too chicken?"

"He's right Peter I'm a chicken, cluck cluck." Chris said, not to be goaded into doing the rope course.

"Did you climb trees as a kid?" Peter asked.

"Sure did," Chris admitted.

"It's just like that. It's a little fear, that only gets bigger if you let it. Embrace the fear and let it push you to discover just how much courage you truly have."

She made a face at him, but was done talking. She let him put the harness on her and clicked the helmet in place. Chris didn't know if she could do it. But for some reason she wanted to please Peter, show him that she was worthy of his time. The climb up to the rope bridge was easy. She clipped her line to the safety rope.

'If there is a God, may you protect me now,' Chris whispered out loud.

She was scared and it showed when her first step made her gasp in surprise. She held on to the guide ropes with a death grip, not moving. Her eyes refocused on the tree across from her. Chris forced herself to move forward, one tiny step at a time. It took so long for her to cross, that only Peter remained standing on the ground. She didn't hear them or see anything except the other tree. Her heartbeat was loud in her ears, adrenaline rushed through her body, but at last she made it to the other side. Relief flooded her, then she quickly climbed down. She was still scared of heights, but she knew she could push herself through it.

They headed back home, taking the shorter route. Chris said under her breath, "but this kind of fear, is not the same that haunts me in my dreams."

Shelby heard her, as they were walking beside each other, "agreed. If you haven't lived through that kind of fear, you just can't understand it. Peter is better than the rest, but he'll never understand."


	3. Chapter 3

_**It's not forgetting that heals. It's remembering**__- Amy Greene, Bloodroot_

CHAPTER #3

Spring time came to Mount Horizon, slowly melting away the past. Once the fog lifted, the sunlight made people smile just a little bit more. Everyone was excited today, because the Cliff Hangers were taking on the Ridge Runners in a football game. The counsellors for each group were the coaches for their teams, so it was Peter against Roger. On Peter's team David was the quarter back and Scott the main receiver. Michael was the quarter back from the Ridge Runners. Auggie had become friends with him after they had settled their differences in the lake, but today they were opponents. The main receiver for them was Kyla, who was an all around good athlete. Winners of the game got to choose what was for diner and be served by the loosing team.

David grinned, "I'm going to enjoy tackling that."

"You're a tool," Shelby said.

"Okay huddle up Cliff Hangers," Peter called to his team. They discussed the first play.

A coin toss determined which side had the ball first. Sophie was one of the referees and blew the whistle to start the game. The Ridge Runners kicked the ball and instead of Scott catching it, Chris did. She ran towards the sidelines, so she wouldn't get tackled. Sophie blew the whistle. The on lookers cheered. They got a touch down, when David connected with Scott on the next play. Everyone had to admit, that Scott definitely excelled in football.

David saw his opportunity to get his revenge on Chris. He grinned, knowing how to play chess, gave him the ability to plot a few steps ahead. He'd have to wait until they got the ball back, for his plan to work. Someone on the Ridge Runners team fumbled the ball, which was recovered by Auggie. This is what David had been waiting for. He put his plan into action. He pretended he was protecting Chris, who had the ball, but he let Michael take him and Chris down to the ground. David was on top of Chris, he had her pinned to the ground.

He took his time getting up and as he did, David said to Chris, "never mess with me Spaz. And don't you forget it."

His weight on top of her, being immobilized by it, compounded with those last words, sent her into a state of shock. She just lay there, eyes open, unmoving. She wasn't lying on the ground, but in a car on a seat, in the past.

When she didn't move, Sophie ran over. "Are you hurt Chris?" When she got no response, she called, "Peter!"

They picked her up and took her to the nurses station. Sophie and the nurse went over her, checking for broken bones. They didn't understand why Chris wasn't responding, since she had no physical injuries. Peter realized then what must be happening. He picked her up and carried her to her dorm, laying her on the bed. Then he sat down in a chair and waited for her to come back to the present. He talked to her, encouraging her to respond. Outside the game continued and he could hear someone congratulate Juliette for catching the football. That made Peter smile, until he looked back at Chris.

Eventually she could hear him, Chris sat up and looked right at him. "Sorry. I'm fine, I just…." She didn't finish the sentence.

"What happened Chris? Where did you go in your mind?" Peter probed.

"No where."

"Common we both know you weren't lying on that field, you were remembering some other place and some other time. Talk to me Chris, give me a chance to help you."

Chris shook her head, "no. You don't understand, I can't talk about it."

"Why, what are you so scared of? You're strong, you proved that facing your fear of having people behind you and of heights," Peter reminded her.

"I… it was my fault. What happened to me was my fault."

Peter shook his head, "why do you think that?"

Chris got off her bed and reached under the mattress. She threw her journal down at his feet. "Read the part called 'Surviving.' I can't tell you, but you can read it. Just like Mike did."

Peter flipped through the book, some of it contained journal entries, some poetry and then he found what she wanted him to read. After the first few words, Peter realized she had written down every graphic detail of every second, of what had happened to her.

…_.pants and under-ware off? 'Don't remember how and over my boots. Winter. Trying to get them back on. Strength- not mine. Suppressing my quivering hands. I'm scared now, oh so very scared. Scream, only in my mind….._

Chris watched Peter's face, scared what she might see there. Would he agree it was all her fault? Would he pity her? She wanted to run, but she stayed stuck to the bed she sat on.

Peter knew she was watching him and made sure he didn't react. He felt sorrow, that this girl had gone through so much. He also felt amazed that shed was letting him read her raw thoughts.

…_..He's rubbing and poking fingers- it hurts so much. Raw. Clenched legs, harder, together- vise grip. He's not listening to me. "Stop", "NO."….._

Chris waited and watched Peter turn the pages. Her whole body wanted to bolt, but something told her to wait. Maybe it was that same something that had kept her from killing herself the night she'd been sexually assaulted by her co-worker. That little voice inside her head, that told her she could survive. Her mind was at war, terrified of what Peter would say, but needing him to say it.

More pages turned and still Peter said nothing.

…_..Try again, "Just let me go, please, just let me go." Pleading. For release, for my sanity, for my life…._

When he got to the end, he could feel his own heart rate was elevated. She had let him experience what had happened to her, like no other child in his care ever had. He closed the book and looked her in the eyes. His eyes held not pity or accusation, but they did hold hope and comfort.

"Thank you for sharing that with me," Peter said.

She nodded and whispered, voice cracking with pain. "See it was my fault. I got in his car, even though my instinct told me not to. I ignored all the warning signs. I liked feeling out of control. I liked that someone older gave me attention… until.. until…" she couldn't finish. Instead of saying more, she began to cry.

This time she didn't flinch when he hugged her. She sobbed, body shaking, tears torn from her eyes. He endured and just held her, giving her the comfort she desperately sought. From behind him he heard something and he turned his head. Shelby was standing there with Scott.

"We came to let you know that the game is over and we won. We didn't mean to intrude," Shelby explained.

"It wasn't your fault Chris. It was never your fault," Scott said. It had taken him a long time, before he had believed that himself.

Shelby spoke next, "when you said no and stop, he should have. It's on him, not on you. And I know you did say those things, from your nightmares."

Chris sat back, leaving Peter's arms. "You don't understand."

Shelby snorted, "yes I do and so does Scott. My stepfather sexually abused me and my sister. I understand more than you know."

"My stepmother took advantage of me too," Scott admitted.

Before Scott and Shelby left to go back to the others, they both offered advise to Chris. "Talk to Peter, purge your soul of this poison." And Shelby parted with, "trust him even if you don't trust yourself. He saved me, so he can save you. If trusting him is your only fear, that keeps you bottled inside your head, then face that fear."

Scott held Shelby's hand and added, "remembering can help you heal, if someone is there to help you through it."

"Thank you Scott and Shelby," Peter said warmly.

Chris nodded and blew her nose in a tissue. She waited for Peter to say something to her. Not sure if she could talk about anything.

"You getting in to his car, even kissing him, does not give him the right to force you to do anything you don't want. Shelby and Scott are 100% right. You should not feel guilty about what happened," Peter explained calmly.

"I sold my soul that night. I was scared he was going to kill me, so I did what he wanted, except I didn't have sex with him. But I'm dead inside now. I should have fought him more or fought to my death," Chris said. "That's why I drank so much, to become numb."

Shelby came back, "you did what you had to do to survive Chris…. Sorry for listening."

Chris nodded. As Shelby turned to go, Chris asked, "you really think so Shelby?"

The blond girl smiled sadly, "I know so."

"But I've done things, wrong things, you'd think differently if you knew."

"I use to live on the streets. I bet I've done a lot worse."

Chris shrugged, "maybe."

Shelby looked at Peter and then left them alone, closing the dorm's door. That little conversation between the two girls, told Peter that what he'd read in the journal Chris had given him, was not the whole story. She had a lot more buried inside her. But they had made huge progress today.

"Chris did someone abuse your vulnerability after this happened? The second one that you mentioned in the past, did someone else abuse you too?"

"Yes," she whispered, unable to look at him.

"Was it someone at the ranch you stayed at?"

"NO!" Chris said with venom. "It was… it was…. I don't want to talk anymore. Just leave me alone."

"Okay, we don't have to talk about that anymore. But can you tell me what happened out there on the field?"

She nodded, "it was David. He sat on me, just like … and then he said 'never mess with me Spaz. Don't you forget it.' It's the last part that triggered my memory." She paused, "I'm not ratting on David, but there's something in him that has my instinct warning that he's dangerous. Now unlike back then, I always believe my instinct, because it's always right. I can't be around him anymore."

Peter frowned, David hadn't changed since he'd come back this second time. He antagonized the other students and teachers. "I'll handle David. Try not to pick a fight with him."

"Can I eat lunch in here? I don't want to be around the others yet."

"I'll bring you a plate. We'll talk again later if you want."

He turned to go, but she stopped him. "Peter?"

"Yes Chris?"

She came to him and hugged him, "thank you for not judging me."

He hugged her back, "the only judge and jury are in your head. I'm here to support you. You can talk to me any time."


	4. Chapter 4

_**It is only in our minds that we are separate from the rest of the world.**__- Gale Luce_

CHAPTER #4

After the revelation Chris gave to Peter, her one on one session became productive. She actually talked to him about the assault and that resulted in her nightmares being less vocal. Her friendship grew with Shelby, Scott and Ezra. When it came to homework, she still helped Auggie and Juliette. Due to the conflicts with David, Daisy wasn't as welcoming. David remained hostile, but didn't go out of his way to antagonize Chris, after the long talk he had with Peter. David had been given a choice, he could either work with the program at Mount Horizon or he could return home. David chose to stay and work on his attitude towards others.

They were in their group session with Peter, sitting in a circle of chairs. He asked them, "how many of you feel guilty for something you did in your past?"

Everyone raised their hands. They looked at each other, realizing they weren't alone in their feelings. So he tried to narrow his field of questioning. "How many of you feel that due to your actions, someone directly got hurt?"

Juliette, Shelby, Scott, Chris and eventually David, raised their hands.

"Anyone want to explain why they feel that way?"

His question was met with silence. He noticed Chris fidgeting and so pinned her with his eyes. "Chris would you like to share?"

"I… I never reported to the police, what they did to me. So they could do it again to someone else."

"Why didn't you go to the police?" Peter asked gently, already guessing the answer.

"Because then my dad and Mike would've known who hurt me and they'd be in jail for murder right now. Because I couldn't handle how my parents would look at me if they knew. Because I could barely stand to be alive, so talking about it, being questioned, would have killed me. But because I didn't tell and I won't tell their names, I always wonder if someone else was hurt because of that."

Shelby reached her hand out and patted Chris's shoulder. "I feel guilty because I ran away and left Jess alone with my stepfather. Because I did that and believed he wouldn't hurt her…." She paused swallowing hard. "… he did the same things to her, that he did to me."

Chris took Shelby's hand and squeezed it, offering support without words. Scott took her other hand.

"But Shelby you did tell someone about that. It's why he's in custody right now. Now Jess can get help and heal," Daisy pointed out.

"Yes, but had I never left in the first place… she'd be okay."

"You can't predict that. He's a monster and he would have probably hurt you both anyway," Scott said.

Peter nodded, "he's right, you can't predict what may or may not have happened. Anyone else?"

The rest remained silent.

Chris summed it up for everyone. "Who I am, hates who I've been."

Everyone, except for David and Daisy, nodded in agreement.

Peter dealt with that feeling with every child he helped and within himself. "Learning from past mistakes and not repeating them, can ease that feeling. I want you all to make a list of everything you hate about yourself. Then make another that changes every negative thing you wrote, into a positive. Make another list of things you enjoy or that makes your happy. We'll discuss those lists, next group session." He paused a moment and then added, "all of you should be proud of who you have become since being here. You've found courage and helped each other through hard times. Every day you keep living, is an accomplishment in it's self."

The session ended and Peter asked Shelby to stay behind. When the others were gone he asked, "how is your sister doing?"

"The shrink sessions are ok, but she's haunted by that house. What's worse is mom still blames us for what Walt did. It's poison there. She needs you and Sophie."

Peter nodded, "we could petition to have her enrolled here in the fall. I know it's a while away. I'll talk to our lawyer."

"Please try Peter. I know it's a lot to ask…" Shelby paused, "but it would give her some hope, something to look forward to."

"We'll do our best Shelby," Peter hugged her.

After Shelby left, Peter got on the phone and started working on how to get Jess to be admitted at Mount Horizon. He was glad he actually have the money to help these girls, unlike in the past. Re-uniting the sisters, might help ease Shelby's feelings of guilt. It would be a small victory, but one none the less.

The Cliff Hangers were on kitchen duty. So that meant some of them helped prepare the food and the others cleaned. Chris was peeling potatoes and carrots with Ezra and Daisy. They were discussing the manifestation of guilt, when Daisy said something truly profound.

It prompted Chris to ask, "Daisy have you ever considered becoming a counsellor here once you graduate?"

Ezra and Shelby agreed, "you always say things that helps us understand what we're going through."

Daisy shrugged, "maybe. I haven't really thought about that far in the future. What about you guys? What do you want to do after graduation?"

Scott said, "college and play some football again."

Chris added, "I agree with college or university, but I want to do some travelling too. I'd have to work like crazy to afford it though."

Daisy nodded, "travelling, that's a good idea."

David said, "getting as far away from my dad would be a bonus. You and I can travel together Daisy."

Ezra rolled his eyes, "I have no idea what I want to do."

Auggie said, "what about you Jules?"

"College for something, maybe fashion. Auggie you should go to art school."

Chris agreed, "I'd buy your stuff. Or you could be a tattoo artist, it's just a different kind of canvas."

Shelby said, "I never even thought about college. I guess I should now. For a long time, I didn't think I had a future."

"Neither did I for a while there, but I think we all do, thanks to this place."

Juliette asked, "anyone hear from Kat? How is she doing in the real world?"

Sophie had come in to check on their progress, "Katherine is doing really well. Peter just received a letter from her. I'll ask him to share it with you after diner."

"Thanks Sophie," Juliette said.

"That should be enough carrots, but we need more peeled potatoes. Also who wants to do the mashing of them? David?"

He shrugged, "sure I can do that."

Sophie handed him the masher and the potatoes that had come out of the boiling water. Daisy was re-assigned to making sure the potatoes were boiled enough to be given over to David. He was having fun with the mashing, but it wasn't going fast enough, so Scott joined him.

"Chris can you go to the fridge and get the milk and butter?" Sophie asked.

"So other than mashed potatoes, what else are we having?"

"Roast beef and before you ask, yes there will be gravy."

They all worked hard to get ready for diner. Then the Wind Dancers took over, they would serve the food and clean up after diner. Once they were in the kitchen, the Cliff Hangers joined the other groups. They always sat at the same tables, rarely did the teams intermingle during eating. Only in classes or during certain group activities, did the teams come together.

Peter came by as they were finishing up. "Once Juliette is done, come over to the fireplace and I'll read Katherine's letter."

"Eat up Jules," Auggie encouraged.

Juliette was a slow eater, but at least she finished her whole plate tonight. She wanted to know how her friend was doing, more so than the others. She took a seat right across from Peter. He waited until everyone was seated and then opened up the letter. Then he began to read. She talked about which college she'd been accepted at and how she'd been nervous on the first day.

"But a lot of the things here in college are like being at Mount Horizon. I'm still running all over campus, but now it's to my college classes. I still cary a heavy back pack, but instead of camping gear it's text books. So even though we sometimes feel like it's torture for what you make us do Peter, I thank you now."

He continued reading the letter, which in typical Katherine style, was a few pages long. When he was done, he liked what he saw on the faces of the Cliff Hangers.

"So even though we're messed up in the head, we're like everyone else in the world. Hey, maybe I can get through college," Auggie said.

"From the sounds of that letter, Kat is doing better than her average classmate," Daisy observed.

"Either way, I still don't like going for jogs," Ezra said.

Everyone laughed, Peter left and everyone dispersed to do their own thing. Chris realized that they weren't that different from everyone else in the world. She felt less alone than she had in the past.


	5. Chapter 5

_** Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.**__- Cherie Carter-Scott_

CHAPTER #5

The following month was once again time for parental visitation. Chris was informed by Peter that her sister would not be able to attend. She was relieved by that news. Ezra's dad was coming, but not his mom. They were going to trade off visitation, so to be less stressful on their son. Ezra's parents were still battling it out with their divorce proceedings. Shelby's mother was unable to attend due to work issues, but Jess would come for a quick visit with their biological father. Both of Auggie's parents were coming up and told him they were bringing something for Juliette too. The fathers of David, Daisy and Scott, would also come to visit. Only Juliette had not been given word if her mother would come. As was the usual process, the whole campus was getting a super cleaning job, fixed up and some parts repainted. Signs made to welcome the parents, etc. There was an air of anxiety and excitement.

Both during their group session and their one on one sessions, they talked to Peter about how they felt about the visit and about their parents. Shelby was surprised that her biological father would be coming and pleased that he was escorting her sister on the visit also. She didn't remember much about him, since he'd divorced her mother when she was still very young and Jess was a baby. Child Services had advised him of the abuse, so he knew some of Shelby's story.

"I resent him in a way, because he dropped out of our lives and wasn't there to protect me from Walt. I hate my mother for knowing what was happening to me and to Jess, but not doing anything to stop it."

"Does your anger make you feel any better?" Peter asked.

"No, but it hides the pain. I don't know if I can forgive them for abandoning us when we needed them the most. When I needed them."

"Forgiveness is something we all need to face, but few of us achieve. I remember hating my Dad for a long time for giving up on me too. Frank became the father I always wished I had. But I realized my Dad did the best he could, eventually I forgave him. A little pain lingered after he was gone, but I remembered the good times I had with him. What about you Shelby, do you remember any good times with your mom and dad?"

"A few. When we did our solos, my mom had sent my ballet shoes from when I was a little girl. I can remember both my parents coming to my recital, to watch me dance. Everything prior to Walt, was like a normal family. But after they divorced, then mom remarried. Then things began to change. My mom may not have known about the abuse in the beginning, but she knew it before I ran away. I don't know if I will ever forgive her."

While they were discussing her feelings, Peter had a call transferred to his office. When he picked up the line, he understood why they hadn't heard from Juliette's mother. He took down the details and would call back. He finished his session with Shelby and asked her to send Juliette to his office.

"Juliette have a seat. I have some news to share with you. You're mother is in the hospital in critical condition. Her kidneys and liver have begun to shut down. Your stepfather reports that the doctor confirmed that it's a result of your mother not eating properly and starving herself for years. She abused her body. Your stepfather Hal, will come pick you up tomorrow and take you to see your mother."

"Okay," was Juliette's response. She didn't know how to feel.

"Do you want to talk about your mother?" Peter asked as he watched her emotions run across her face.

"No, I'm okay Peter. Thanks for letting me know."

He nodded and she left. Peter went to find Sophie and asked her to keep an eye on Juliette. He explained what had happened and he worried Juliette might start cutting herself again.

Later on that day, Sophie saw Juliette with Auggie and Chris. She was telling them about her mother. The counsellor tried not eavesdrop, but it was hard not to. What she heard was encouraging.

"Jules I hope you get back from the hospital to see my parent's again. My mom really wanted to see you," Auggie said.

"I doubt I'll be there long. I wouldn't miss out on your mom's cooking Auggie."

Chris added, "you're better than your mother. You listened to the people who wanted to help you. Sounds like this place saved your life too."

Juliette nodded, "my mom wasn't happy with herself, so she took it out on me. It took me a long time to realize that. This last marriage, is her fifth. But I like Hal compared to all my other stepfathers, he's really nice."

"My parents are a little like your mom. They really bash my sister for her weight. She's shorter than me, but heavier. She definitely got the Italian gene, where as I got the German side. They bugged me about my weight too. When I was 14 I got really sick. I didn't barf it up, I just wouldn't eat. I was well under what someone my height was supposed to be. I fainted a lot, got hives and ended up in hospital being tube fed. When they released me, my parents still wouldn't accept that I wasn't fat, even though my family doctor confirmed I wasn't. On my own I made a conscious effort to eat again, because I wanted to do the direct opposite of what they wanted. Anyway parents are jerks. Mine are dead to me now. I don't care what happens to them," Chris said with a calm finality.

"Isn't it weird how we hurt ourselves, because they hurt us? It's like a double whammy on us."

"I just pictured what the video game whammy symbol would be too. Something like this," Auggie sketched out a drawing and made both girls laugh.

Sophie decided to tell Peter about Chris confessing to not eating. She didn't seem to have a problem with eating now, but who knows if in the future it would happen again. It wasn't too long ago when it had happened, so there was still some cause for concern.

It was early morning when Juliette left with Hal. Her stepfather had hugged her warmly and told her how great she looked. Peter had a feeling this stepfather genuinely cared about his new stepdaughter and would be very comforting during this hard time.

Some other parents began arriving early, so Peter greeted them and shared some of the accomplishments of his students. The first group didn't seem to have any issues, everyone was happy to be reunited. General Ruxton, David's dad, arrived early also. He had a chat with Peter, in his usual abrupt way. Then he shook David's hand. Peter left them to greet Mark's mother and her boyfriend. The way Mark and the boyfriend exchanged glances, confirmed his suspicion of Mark's sexual orientation. He'd talk to Sophie about Mark's progress later. More and more parents arrived, when he saw both Scott and Daisy's dads arrive, he made sure he was close by to offer support.

"Dad," Scott said in greeting.

"Scott you look healthy," Mr. Barringer said.

Peter watched them walk to the picnic tables and sit down. For now, everything looked like it was going well. He went over to say hello to Daisy's dad.

Mr. Martin Barringer looked at Scott and neither said anything. The silence began to get awkward and then Martin blurted, "I'm seeing a counsellor too Scott."

"A shrink?" Scott asked, not sure he heard his dad correctly.

"Well, yes. I talk to him about what happened between you and Elaine. I'm trying Scott. I'm trying to understand it all."

Scott looked down and asked the one question he dreaded the answer to. "Do you still blame me dad?"

His dad avoided answering the question. Instead he said, "I divorced Elaine and I filed a restraining order against her. She's out of our lives for good."

"You didn't answer the question," Scott pushed.

"I'm not ready yet Scott. But I'm trying, okay. Give me a break here."

Scott stood up, "give you a break? Are you serious? You know what dad, don't come back until you can answer that question." He began walking away.

"Scott come back here!" Martin said angrily.

"No Dad. Just go." Scott turned his back and walked away.

Peter intercepted Scott. "Didn't go the way you hoped?"

"Does it ever?"

"One day it will. But you handled it well, I'm proud of you Scott."

"At least someone is," Scott said sadly. Then he asked, "Shelby's dad and sister here yet?"

"No she's waiting by the main lodge's steps."

When Scott left, Peter returned to Daisy and her dad. Her dad admitted he was finished his rehab and was going to AA meetings every day.

"See honey, I'm on step 8 right now. I have to make a list of everyone I have hurt and then make amends. You're at the top of my list."

"Good for you Daddy," Daisy said dryly. Then with an extra dose of sarcasm added, "where did mom fall on that list?"

Peter came by right at that moment. "How are you Mr. Lipenowski?"

"Following the steps of AA and going to meetings. It's hard work, but I'm trying to be a better father. She's my biggest critic."

"One day at a time, is a good rule for all things in life." Peter said. He looked at Daisy and she nodded that she was okay. He left them and moved on.

"Do you think one day you might forgive me Daisy?"

"Maybe one day Dad," she replied truthfully.

There were two soccer games between parents vs children, later that afternoon. The General of course took over as captain of the parents for the Cliff Hangers, Trackers and Ridge Runners. The kids voted to have Scott be their captain. The counsellors were the referees. The Wind Dancers and Sun Dogs had a second game going at the same time. The winning team would face off with each other in the final and third game. The games would run most of the afternoon, allowing the other counsellors to set up for diner.

Every parent and every child had a chance to participate. But those who wanted to play the game, could be on the field longer, than those who did not, after everyone had a turn. Scott soon found out that Mark was fantastic as a goalie and that David was a good forward. Auggie and Chris were also really good at moving the ball up field. The parents held their own, but there was a lot of personality conflicts resulting in miscommunication and bickering. The kids won on the co-operation front. In the end the parents lost, for both of the two games. Everyone had a break and then the final game would begin. Refreshments and snacks were served.

David saw Mark and Mark's mother's boyfriend talking. "Look dad, there's a pair of fags. You don't see them in the military often do you?"

Mark heard him and confronted David. "What did you just call me?"

"You're a homo, a fag, a queen, ass bandit, fairy…." David didn't stop.

"David enough," General Ruxton demanded.

"Why dad? You said that you'd never let a faggot be on your squad. Well you just did," David pointed at the mother's boyfriend.

"Shut up! I'm not a homosexual!" Mark denied.

"Yes you are, wake up and smell the butt-hole!" David shouted in Mark's face, taking his resentment for his dad, out on the teenager.

Mark swung at David, resulting in them both going down on the ground punching and wrestling. Daisy tried to get David to stop and he accidentally punched her. Peter and Sophie broke up the fight.

"Both of you in my office right now!" Peter instructed.

"Hold on a minute. That won't be necessary. David just proved to me that nothing has changed. He needs discipline and not this place any more. He just hit a girl. I'm putting him into the military. You had your chance to change him. He had his chance to prove he'd grown up. Well no more chances," General Ruxton said angrily.

Before Peter could protest further, the General grabbed his son by the collar of his shirt and dragged him away. "I'll send for his things next week."

"No Dad! No!" David said, "I'm sorry Daisy! I didn't mean it!"

But his apologies made no difference to The General.

Chris gave Daisy a cloth with ice in it, "put this on your eye."

Peter excused himself and asked that Mark's family wait outside his office. Sophie took over for spotting the game. After the excitement that had just finished, it took a little for the two teams to regroup and play again. In the end the game ended at a tie. They got cleaned up and then went inside to eat.

Mark was on shuns for a week due to fighting with David. Peter allowed him to join his family for diner, but right after they left, he was assigned to cleaning toilets.

"Daisy did you have the nurse look at your eye?" Peter asked.

She nodded, "David didn't mean to punch me."

"Unfortunately he made some bad choices today and hopefully will survive the consequences. I tried to talk to his father, once he calmed down, but his mind is made up. There's nothing we can do. I'm sorry Daisy," Peter said.

"A lot of people have been saying that to me today," Daisy replied.

Shelby came by with her sister Jess and her biological father. "Peter this is my dad and you remember my sister."

"Hello. How's it going Jess?"

"I'm treading water," Jess said cryptically.

"We've forgiven our dad for leaving us with Walt. That's progress right?" Shelby asked.

"That it is. Glad to hear it," Peter replied, shaking the man's hand.

"Did you see my girl on the soccer field, she was great."

"Dad please."

"He's right Shelby. You and Scott make a great team." Jess smiled at her sister.

Peter frowned, "where is Scott? I thought he was with you guys."

"He was, he just went to the washroom."

Peter nodded with relief. Someone from the lodge called him that there was a phone call. "Well enjoy the rest of your visit, excuse me."

He got into his office and picked up the phone. It was Juliette, she was letting him know that Hal was bringing her back. She asked if she could talk to him when they returned. Peter said he'd wait for her in the main lodge and if she wanted to talk, they could, even if it was really late. Like a concerned parent, he would worry about her until she was back under his care. He hoped that she'd been able to forgive her mom, as it might be the last chance she got to say good-bye.


	6. Chapter 6

_** The emptiness inside us is not from starving our bodies of food, but from starving our souls from love.**__- unknown author_

CHAPTER #6

It was night when Juliette was finally dropped off by her stepfather Hal. Everyone else had already left. The first words from Juliette when he saw her, surprised Peter.

"I'm hungry, is there any food left?"

He smiled, "Auggie's parents said they were sorry to miss you. His mom left you a big plate of food."

"His mom and dad are great. Do you want some?" Juliette asked as she accepted the plate of food and took a burrito off it.

"Thank you, I think I will join you. It smells so good," Peter said. He waited until she was done eating. "So how did your visit go?"

"I found out my new stepfather, is a cool dad. He was very supportive and he really does love me and my mother. Dad number 5 is the best." She paused and looked at her empty plate. "My mom wasn't just starving her body, she starved her heart from loving anyone. I finally saw her for who she was. She didn't look beautiful, she looked like a skeleton. I realized I don't want to be like my mom. Even on her death bed, she still said I was too heavy. I don't think she even saw me for me. She wouldn't admit she was really sick. She complained that the iv in her arm was making her fat. It was really sad Peter."

"Were you able to say good-bye? Did you forgive your mother?"

"I'm not ready to forgive her yet. But I did tell her I loved her and I said good-bye. I have no regrets about that visit. I'm glad I went. But I don't need to see her again. I hope it's okay that I told Hal he can leave updates on her health with you or Sophie."

"That's fine with me."

"I know you're worried about me Peter. But I'm okay. This time I'm okay. I'm done living my life for my mom. I know that I could never please her, because she was never happy with herself. How can you love someone else, if you can't love yourself?"

"You're right Juliette. It's what we try to teach everyone here; you have to love yourself first," Peter confirmed.

Juliette took off her sweater and showed him her arms. "See no new marks."

"I'm proud of you Juliette. You've handled yourself in a crisis, with strength and courage." He stood up and she accepted his hug. "Now go on, it's late and you should get to bed."

"Good night Peter." Juliette went to her dorm. She tried to be quiet when she came in, so she wouldn't wake anyone else, but she didn't have to worry.

"Jules, how are you?" Chris asked.

"Did you guys all wait up for me?" She asked in surprise.

"Even me Princess," Shelby said rolling over in her bed.

"I'm okay everyone. My mom, she starved herself to death… well almost to death. But that's not going to be me. At least I got a cool dad out of it all in the end."

"So Jules, you approve of daddy number 5?" Daisy asked.

"Yes… yes I do…. Oh no, what happened to you?"

"David lost his cool and got in a fight with Mark, calling him a fag and stuff. While they were fighting, Daisy tried to stop them. David punched her," Shelby explained.

"So what happened to David?"

"The General hauled him off to the military. I don't think we'll see David ever again. Sorry Daisy, but it's the truth," Chris said.

"I know. David just wouldn't forgive his dad for bullying him and in the end, it cost him the things that made him happy."

"Can we talk about this stuff in the morning. It's late and I'm exhausted," Shelby complained.

"Thanks for waiting up everyone, I'll be quick and then I'll turn the lights off."

The girls said good night and then went to sleep. Each thinking about the day that they had just survived. All of them knowing, they didn't want to starve their souls from love, because it was the one thing they all really needed.


	7. Chapter 7

_** Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle .**__- Napoleon Hill_

CHAPTER #7

Scott was still sulking from his father's visit. He didn't mean to take it out on his friends, but his bitterness leaked out everywhere. He was distant with Shelby and that resulted in them having a fight. They bickered back and forth.

"Give it a rest already!" Daisy said with annoyance.

"Mine your own business," Scott snarled.

"You make it my business when you fight in front of me."

Scott stomped off to go chop wood.

"What's his problem?" Daisy asked.

Ezra rolled his eyes, "you mean what isn't? Since his visit with his dad, he's been a jerk."

Shelby nodded, "tell me about it. I'm not in the mood to make out and now suddenly I don't love him any more."

Chris grinned, "boyfriend troubles… wow that sounds so normal."

The others all looked at her and then grinned. Shelby said, "and we are so NOT normal. Puts things into perspective. I guess I should make up with him."

"Rule #1- you make the guy grovel a little before you forgive him for stupidity," Chris said.

"Please just put the rest of us out of our misery," Auggie complained.

"Alright, keep your pants on." Shelby got her jacket and headed to the wood pile.

As soon as Scott saw her he began to apologize. "I'm sorry Shelby. It's not you, it's me and dad. He still blames me for what Elaine did."

"I'm sorry too Scott, we just shouldn't take it out on each other." She pulled him behind the wall of wood and they embraced.

He leaned his head against hers and sighed. "You're the only thing that makes me smile and have hope."

"That's the weight of the world on my shoulders," she teased.

Scott smiled sadly. She felt bad for him and caressed his face, using his hair to pull him to her. She kissed him gently, until he responded. His tongue danced inside her mouth, in such a way that she groaned. Their hands reached for each other, needing to be closer, needing that intimacy.

"Hey Scott? Where are you?" Auggie called. Then he came over to the wood wall, "Dude, Peter is about to come outside. You two don't want him to catch you like that."

Suddenly both Scott and Shelby appeared, fixed their clothing and grinned. "Thanks for the warning. I better go," she said.

"You two really need to find a chance to be alone. Your sexual tension is just oozing over all of us." Auggie said to Scott after Shelby left.

They picked up the wood chunks and continued stacking the wall. "I know, but we want some time, not have it rushed. She means more to me than just a quicky."

"It'll definitely take some planning and effort, but we'll figure something out to get you two alone."

"Thanks Auggie."

Peter came over to the wood pile, bringing with him two guys from the Trackers, one from the Ridge Runners and a girl from the Sun Dogs. "I have a secret project for you all. As you know Sophie and I are engaged. With everything that's been going on, we haven't had time to even think about getting married. But I want to do it by the end of this spring. So this is what we're going to build."

"It's a gazebo right?" Auggie asked. "So why not use the one already made?"

Janet rolled her eyes, "because actions speak louder than words. He has to put the labour of love into this union. Guys…." she rolled her eyes.

"This one is smaller I think," Scott said looking at the basic sketch.

"Exactly. It's where the minister will marry us. The girls are working on their own secret project, to help make this wedding come together. Janet from the Sun Dogs and Kyle from the Trackers are working on the architectural design. We are their labourers."

Everyone shook each other's hands and began discussing the construction. They made a list of tools and equipment they would need to get started. Then they went into the forest to find the best wood for the construction.

"Peter how are you going to explain what were doing to Sophie?" Kyle asked.

"I haven't thought of that yet," Peter admitted.

"Just tell her it's a place for one on one sessions to be held outside," Scott suggested.

"Meat, now you're thinking." Auggie slapped Scott on the back.

"That might work, I'll worry about it when she asks. Just think guys and girl, that you'll all get a party out of this."

"Now you're talking!" Janet said, a big smile filling her face.

Back in the lodge, Juliette, Shelby, Chris and some of the other girls, were planning Sophie's wedding.

Chris asked, "how are we going to figure out the wedding dress?"

Susan said shyly, "I can design one. That's my thing, making cloths. I just need fabric and her sizes. One of her dresses will do all that and show me her taste."

"Wow, that's amazing. I guess Peter will get whatever fabric you need."

Juliette sighed, "the one thing about my mom constantly getting married, is that I'm a pro at weddings."

"Peter said we'll get a dance out of it for everyone, you know the after party." Shelby added with a wink.

"What about food? There has to be a menu of sorts. Maybe both their favourite foods?" Chris asked.

"Do we know how long we have to do all this?" Daisy inquired, always the practical one.

"Well Peter said the end of Spring at the latest. The guys are building something for the wedding, once that's done we have to be ready."

They brain stormed, made lists of things they would need and then got to work doing research. Each of them wanted this to work out, but all of them had different reasons. Whenever Sophie was near, they made sure to hide their research or talk about a completely different topic. She had a strange feeling they were up to something, but she could never prove anything.

Between classes and chores, they worked on their special project. The girls even helped haul the wood, which got them out of having to go for runs or other physical tasks. Peter showed the guys how much he trusted them, by teaching proper use of a chainsaw and allowing each of the labourers to use it to cut down a tree. That made the work faster than just using an ax. What couldn't be dragged by hand, they used the quad. There was a sense of accomplishment as the structure began to form. Same with the details of the wedding falling into place. When the girls saw Susan's design for Sophie's wedding dress, they giggled and gushed, giving her lots of praise. Even Daisy wore a smile that reached her eyes. Working together, even though it was a struggle, was very rewarding for all of them.


	8. Chapter 8

_** A good friend is a connection to life, a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world.**__- Lois Wyse_

CHAPTER #8

Peter called Chris into his office, it was her two month progress report. She was doing a lot better than when she had arrived. This meant she got a visit from the outside world. He was disappointed that once again the sister had an excuse as to why she couldn't attend.

"Chris is there anyone else who you'd like to get a visit from?"

"My friend Mike. He's more like family to me than anyone else anyway." Chris gave Peter his contact information. "Did my sister say why she couldn't come?"

"The same reason as last time, no one to take care of her horses while she comes here."

"Oh," Chris said. "She has a hobby farm. Maybe the pregnant mare she has is about to foal or something."

Peter could tell she was hurt and trying to justify her sister's absence. "I'll let you know if I get in touch with your friend Mike. I'd like to meet him. He sounds like a great friend."

"At one time he was my only connection to life," her voice caught. She fought tears and didn't give in to the feeling of hopelessness. Then she smiled, "he is judgemental and always pushes me to do better. He's a health nut too."

"Sometimes we need someone truthful in our corner." And then he added, "can you send Juliette to my office if you see her?"

"Sure. And thanks Peter." She left and rejoined the others doing their homework.

"What was that all about?" Shelby asked.

"My two month progress report. Turns out my sister won't be coming, but Peter's making an exception and will see if my best friend can make it. I doubt it, since the notice is really late."

"Usually when family visits, it's more stressful than when they don't," Scott contributed.

"I guess you're right. Oh and before I forget, Peter wants to see you Jules."

Juliette nodded and left the table. Auggie went with her, for support.

"Come in," Peter said as she knocked on his door. "Have a seat Juliette."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry to tell you that your mother has passed away. This weekend is her funeral. Hal will pick you up to attend it."

Juliette thought she would cry, when she got this news, but she had no tears. "I'm sad, but in a way I'm not. Does it make me a terrible person to say that I'm relieved?"

"It doesn't make you a bad person, it is understandable. Would you like to talk about it?"

"No, I'm okay. Thanks for letting me know," Juliette replied. "Can I go now?" She waited for his nod and then left, closing his door behind her.

"So what's up Twig?" Auggie teased affectionately.

"Mom's dead, funeral is Saturday."

Auggie hugged her, "awe Jules…"

"It's okay. I'm sad, but it's not such a bad thing. Maybe now I can finally get on with my life. I'm also glad that it's Hal who is my dad, instead of one of the other stepfathers."

They rejoined the others and Juliette told them about the funeral. Everyone offered their support, especially Daisy. She too had lost her mother, although the circumstances were completely different.

"Ok, I can't get this answer to match yours. What am I doing wrong? I hate math!" Chris said, tossing her binder.

"Calm down Spaz," Shelby teased. "Look you mixed up the formula."

"Seriously?" Chris groaned.

Scott looked over Shelby's shoulder, "she's right. I'll explain why," he sat down and showed her an easier way to figure out what formula to use.

Chris remained between Shelby and Scott, but Auggie and the others listened too. Together, with everyones help, Chris finally understood. "I feel so stupid when it comes to math."

"That's how I use to feel about english," Auggie said. "Then a good friend helped me with that." He winked at Juliette.

"I suck at art," Ezra piped up.

"He's not lying. Even his stick men are bad," Daisy teased.

Peter came by and took Chris aside a moment. "Mike will be able to come visit you tomorrow, but he won't get here until the afternoon."

"Oh thank you Peter!" Chris said, giving him a huge smile and happy dance.

She danced back to the table, "my friend Mike is coming to visit tomorrow! Hopefully you can all meet him. Oh, I'll be right back," Chris ran off to catch up to the director. "Peter I was wondering, that when Mike comes, could I take him out to the climbing wall or the rope course? He's totally into sports and would love it."

"We'll see when he gets here, because one of the counsellors would have to go with you two."

"Ok, I just thought I'd ask first. Thanks," Chris left to return to her group.

The rest of the day couldn't go by fast enough for Chris. For the first time in a long time she didn't have a nightmare. The other girls were all amazed at how much energy she had in the morning. But what floored them is when she asked for Juliette's help to make her hair look nice. Chris was the least vain of them all.

"I want to look good for Mike."

"Is he your boyfriend or something?" Shelby asked.

"No, we tried, but it didn't work out. We're just best friends."

"But at one time you did hook up with him?"

"Yes. It's a long story. Doesn't matter, he doesn't see me like that, anymore."

Shelby snorted, "maybe. I'll be the judge of that."

Juliette surveyed her handy work and then said, "okay go look in the mirror and tell me what you think."

Chris did so. "Wow I look pretty. Thanks so much," she called from the bathroom.

Daisy whispered dryly, "this guy better be worth it."

"Shh!" Juliette scolded.

Classes couldn't have been more boring today for Chris. She just had her mind elsewhere. At 3:30 pm she waited at the main lodge for Mike to arrive. When she saw him walking up the path, everyone watched as she bolted to him. He caught her in his arms and hugged her a long time. Finally he let go and they walked arm in arm towards Peter.

"You look great," Mike said to Chris. "I love what you did to your hair."

The smile she gave him hurt her face.

"Hi I'm Peter and welcome to Mount Horizon."

"Hi I"m Mike Remlo." He shook Peter's hand. "Before Chris shows me around, can I talk to you privately? I won't be long Chris and then I'm all yours."

Peter nodded, "sure come to my office."

Mike sat down in the seat that Peter offered. "I've been told by Veronica why Chris is here, even though I'm sure you know by now that her drinking was just a result of what really happened. Anyway, her parents have legally disowned her. Veronica has custody of Chris. But that's not the worst of it, her sister is a piece of work." Mike shook his head with disgust. "Veronica doesn't want to have anything to do with Chris, that's why she hasn't come. She said she'll keep paying tuition for her, but she doesn't want her to come back. Once Chris graduates, she's on her own."

"Thank you for telling me. I take it, that you won't be telling Chris yourself?"

"No, I'm worried what she would do. She's got a lot of issues with her parents, even before she started drinking heavy. But when it comes to them, she won't tell me anything. Well I better get back out there…. By the way, if she ever needs someone from home, I'm here for her no matter what."

Peter nodded and watched Mike leave. He was amazed at the level of friendship that Mike had just displayed for Chris. He wondered if she knew just how much he cared about her. He watched their interaction and decided on the spot to take the Cliff Hangers and Mike to the rock wall himself. He waited until Chris finished her tour and had introduced him to her group.

"Okay Cliff Hangers, Chris says she'll climb the rock wall and repel down if her friend Mike joins us. Anyone want to come with us?"

As expected they all did. No one believed that Chris would do it, since they remembered her fear of heights and the issues she had with the rope course.

"This I've got to see to believe," Ezra said.

"You have a rock wall?" Mike asked.

Scott grinned, "and a rope course, we go rock climbing, mountain biking, kayaking and stuff like that. But most people here, like Ezra and Juliette, find that stuff as bad as doing chores."

"At home Chris is just as lazy as the next person. Except when it comes to horses," Mike teased.

"Thanks a lot. You forget I was on the track and field team. I just don't like going to the gym like you do," Chris retorted with a grin. She saw that the girls were appreciating Mike's muscular arms and legs.

"Ok, we've got the gear, let's get moving," Peter said as he lead off at a jog.

It didn't take them long to arrive at the climbing wall. Peter helped Chris get the harness on and made sure Mike's was done up right also.

"One step at a time Chris," Peter encouraged.

Mike climbed beside her. "Don't look down, just up. You're doing great."

Chris made it half way and lost her foot hold. She looked down to replace it and couldn't move. She was so high up.

"Don't stop!" Scott yelled.

"I can't move. I'm scared!" She yelled back.

Mike had climbed to the top no problem, "Chris look at me. Up here, come on. Do it for me. Trust me you're safe."

That did it, Chris continued to climb up to him. When she got to the top, he helped her over the edge. She clung to him, as the Cliff Hangers cheered.

"How do I get down Peter?" Chris called down.

Mike grinned, "watch me." He eased himself backward over the edge, using the line.

"No way." Chris refused.

Peter watched Mike try and encourage his friend to follow him. But he also noticed Chris was starting to panic. "Scott take the line."

Peter quickly climbed up the wall and to Chris. "Breath with me Chris, slowly in and slowly out. Good. Now Mike is on one side and I'm on the other. Your line is secure. Trust us, we won't let you fall. We won't fail you."

"Promise?" Her voice quivered.

"Promise," they said in unison.

Taking a big breath, she leaned back into the air and took a step down. Everyone kept calling out encouragement. She was still scared, adrenaline screaming through her, but she continued down. Tears even ran down her cheek, but together the three of them took one step at a time all the way down. As soon as her feet touched the ground, Chris turned to Mike and hugged him. Then same with Peter.

"Group HUG!" Juliette shouted.

Once everyone let go, Chris turned to them. "I did it! Thank you everyone for helping me."

"I'm impressed," Mike said. "She's terrified of heights. This one time Chris climbed a tree to rescue a cat. Well she got up the tree no problem, then the cat climbed down and Chris didn't. I had to go up and piggy back her back down."

Everyone laughed. Scott couldn't help asking, "what do you bench?"

Chris answered for him, "me. Or at least he use to."

Scott nodded impressed. "All natural?"

Again Chris spoke before Mike could, "and I quote 'my body is a temple' is what he always says. Annoying, but true. No steroids and only natural supplements."

"That takes a lot of discipline," Peter commented.

Mike nodded, "I want to compete for body building, so just like any sport I have to work at it."

"It's time to head back," Peter added, making sure the gear was all packed. "Take the lead Chris."

They jogged off, but she kept picking up the pace. Mike grinned, when Scott challenged, "for the last mile, rematch with you Chris!"

"And if I win?"

"I'll take over your dish washing for the next two days and you can do my drying," Scott offered.

"And if I loose?"

"You do the sanding on Peter's project for me for the next two days," Scott replied.

"You okay with that Peter?" Chris asked.

"Sure," he replied.

"Okay Scott, challenge accepted. Shelby you say go, when we get closer."

As agreed to, when a mile was left, Shelby called it and the two raced away. Mike and Auggie ran behind them, to confirm who won. Ezra and the girls, stayed with Peter, enjoying the slower pace.

"He's nice, I can't believe they're not together," Juliette said.

"Mike's hot, did you see his arms?" Daisy added.

"Girls," Peter warned.

Ezra asked, "what do you think of him Peter?"

"Seems like he's a great friend to Chris. Someone she trusts and wants to make happy. A good influence on her for sure."

"We approve too," Shelby said.

Peter grinned, they were protective of her, like family. "Sometimes the right person, can make all the difference in your life."

At last they caught up to Scott, Chris, Auggie and Mike. Ezra asked, "who won?"

Auggie groaned with disgust, "it was a tie."

Mike nodded, "neither gave up, they both pushed it to the end."

When no one was paying attention, Chris whispered to Shelby, "that's what they think."

"Why?"

"Because sometimes it's not about winning."

Mike looked at his watch, "Chris I have to go soon."

She pouted. "I wish you didn't, but I know you do."

He walked with her to the lodge to get his jacket. His arm around her. "Chris are they helping you here? Are you letting them? Be honest with me."

Chris took a moment before answering. "I don't have vocal nightmares anymore and they are getting less and less the ones I do have. I let Peter read what I let you read." She took his hand. "If you'll be there with me, I'll tell you and Peter something I have never told anyone."

"You know I will."

"Okay." She took a deep breath. Then walked over to Peter. "We need to talk to you. Can we do this in your office?"

"I'll be right there."

They waited by his office and then he let them in. He sat down in his chair, noticing Chris clutching Mike's hand like a death grip. "What's up?"

"I have to tell you both something. I couldn't do this on my own. But maybe I can do it now." Chris looked at the floor, so ashamed of what she was going to tell them. "I told my manager that my co-worker was the one that assaulted me. He said he'd protect me… he…."

"You can tell us Chris, it's okay," Mike encouraged.

"He came to my house when I was sick with a cold. No one else was home. I let him in… he… he raped me." She began to cry, "my body responded. I told him 'no' and 'stop' and my body betrayed me. Then later, to keep my job, he made me do things for his friends."

Mike and Peter exchanged a look. Mike took her in his arms and held her. "It wasn't your fault. Tell us his name Chris."

"No." She drew away from him. "Do you believe me that I told him to stop?"

Peter responded for them both, "of course we do."

"You don't blame me?" Chris directed this question to Mike.

"Never. I blame them, those who hurt you. If you can't tell me their names, maybe one day you can tell Peter. I can't promise you that I wouldn't hunt them down and make them pay." Mike vowed. Then added, "let Peter help you. Be as honest to him, as you are to me."

She nodded and accepted the tissues that Peter held out to her. "Thank you for coming Mike," she sniffed.

"Anything for you. Walk me out?"

Chris nodded, emotionally drained. They walked out of the lodge. The Cliff Hangers waived good-bye. Mike gave Chris another hug, then tilted her chin up and kissed her. "Friends forever. We've been through a lot together, you know I love you right?"

"I know. I love you too. I promise to get over this."

Mike smiled, "do it for yourself Chris, not for me."

"I will. Go or I'm going to start crying again," she grinned through fresh tears.

He walked backwards until he was out of sight. She turned and walked back to the lodge. The Cliff Hangers had all seen the intimate kiss.

Shelby said to no one in particular, "see I told you, there's more than just friends going on there. Even if she doesn't realize it."

Peter sat waiting on the steps. "That's some kind of friend you have there." He said to Chris as she passed by.

"The best friend ever."


	9. Chapter 9

_** In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away.**__- Shing Xiong_

CHAPTER #9

After the funeral, being able to focus every waking hour on Sophie's wedding, helped Juliette more than anything. She was busy overseeing that last preparations. The gazebo was done, they had little time to finalize things. Peter had Clair, counsellor of the Wind Dancers, take Sophie to a spa for the day. Clair said she just needed to talk and have some girl time away from work. They were getting their hair and nails done too. That gave everyone on campus a chance to help out and decorate, so that when Sophie returned, the marriage would take place.

"Peter is her mom and dad going to make it in time?" Juliette asked.

"They'll be here in the next twenty minutes or so."

"Good. Frank is your best man and he has the rings?"

"Check and check. The minister will be here at 5 pm."

She nodded, "okay, then you can go get ready. We've got it from here." She sent him away, even though he protested. So she said, "trust us, like we do you." That made him leave.

"Sun Dogs I need you guys to get the string lights on the pavilion, gazebo and in here. Wind Dancers you get to set up the chairs and make sure the isle ones have ribbons and the flower arrangements. Ridge Runners, get the band set up and make sure the sound system is ready. Trackers are in charge of the diner seating, tables, chairs and centre pieces. Cliff Hangers are with me. Let's go people, Peter and Sophie are depending on us!" Juliette directed the troops and everyone set about their assigned tasks.

"Girl's do we have the dress ready?"

Susan brought it forward, "it's ready."

"Wow that is so beautiful. Nice work!" Juliette said in awe. "Do we have something blue?"

Daisy stepped forward, "this necklace has blue Forget Me Not flowers, fitting don't you think?"

"Perfect. Is that also covering something borrowed?"

Daisy nodded. "All we need is something old, because the something new is the dress itself and the garter that Susan made."

"I've got the something old. It's my grandmother's gold tierra. That will look perfect in her hair," Juliette said.

"What else do we need to do?" Scott asked.

"You guys are the ushers, so go get cleaned up and put on those tuxedos Peter got you."

"Oh no, the bouquet, has anyone seen that?" Juliette panicked.

"I had the Wind Dancers make it. It's sitting in the fridge, so the flowers stay fresh longer," Chris answered.

"And the Trackers say the wedding cake is ready too."

Juliette checked her list again. "So all we need is to get Sophie ready when she arrives. Girls go get ready, we won't have time later!" She stayed back, making sure everything was perfect. The team leaders for each group reported to her once their assigned task was completed.

"Juliette go get ready, I've got this until you get back." Shelby took the clip board.

Chris was finished getting ready too and she joined Shelby. "The girls and I planned a surprise for you and Scott. Later when everyone is at the main party, go to our dorm. We set it up extra special for you and Scott to have some alone time. We figure we have you covered for maybe 45 minutes."

"Really?" Shelby asked.

"Really. Oh and in your night stand are two condoms." Chris giggled and winked at her.

"You guys are the best! Damn, now I'm nervous. Does Scott already know too?"

"No. Guys can't handle pressure, it causes bad performance," Chris grinned. "Anyway, you sneaking away with him, will be all the hint he needs."

Shelby returned the grin. "I won't forget this."

"You better not," Daisy said joining them.

Auggie came out of the guy's dorm. "Wow you three look amazing. These dresses are better than those ones from the MORP."

"Thanks to Daisy and her dad."

"I figured he owed me," she said. "He gets a picture of me in a dress that's not black. I say we're even."

Scott and Ezra joined him.

"Wow you two clean up really nice. Handsome even," Chris complemented.

Juliette finally came to join them. Everyone watched her come. But it was Auggie's reaction that she waited for the most. It made her heart soar, when his mouth hung open and his eyes widened. She grinned when Scott helped him close his mouth.

"You're a goddess!" Auggie gushed.

Juliette blushed.

"Take her arm silly, you're her escort."

He did as he was told and kissed her cheek. His eyes never leaving her.

Susan rushed up, "Peter is talking to her parents. He looks sexy for an old guy."

Everyone laughed. Chris added, "don't let him hear you call him old."

The Cliff Hangers got ready for the last stages of their secret plan to help Peter and Sophie get married. When Sophie arrived, Clair brought her into the lodge.

"Surprise Sophie. You're getting married today. Susan will help you with your dress. Then I have your make-up. Let's go people," Juliette directed.

Sophie didn't have time to say no or do anything except obey. She was in shock, but her smile was big and her eyes teared up with joy. "Thank you girls, you don't know how much this means to me. You're my daughters, all of you."

Daisy and Shelby shared a look. That comment, was something they would cherish forever.

"Susan you are so talented. That dress is better than any designer I have seen," Juliette gushed. "Sophie is sexy, classy and stunning all at once. Peter's eyes are going to fall out of his head!"

Shelby inspected the make-up, "you did pretty good at painting her face."

They gave her the blue necklace and the gold tierra, with the veil attached. Sophie was ready.

Juliette gave one last direction, as she stood at the door to the courtyard. "Places everyone, here comes the bride!"

The girls found their seats, with their favourite ushers. The band began to play and Sophie's father gave her his arm. They walked towards Peter and the look in his eyes sealed the deal for Sophie, even before they exchanged vowed. During the ceremony, Auggie looked at Juliette and squeezed her hand.

Scott and Shelby whispered to each other, "I love you."

Chris held Ezra's hand, "pinch me if you see a tear well up in my eye."

Ezra grinned, "as long as they are happy tears, let them fall. I came prepared… see a pocket full of tissues."

Juliette sniffed, "could I have a tissue Ezra?"

He smiled and handed two to each girl in their row. Chris leaned over and kissed his cheek, she saw Daisy watching. Daisy was on the other side of him and she took his other hand.

After Peter and Sophie were pronounced husband and wife, they walked down the isle of chairs to the pavilion. The area erupted with cheers. The girls gathered separately from the guys and Sophie tossed the bouquet. The girl who caught it, was Shelby.

Peter said, "that will have to wait until after you graduate!"

The crowd laughed. Then it was time to take pictures. The students had a chance then to talk to the Director and his newly wed wife. Sophie and Peter also spent time with each of the Cliff Hangers.

Chris explained that Juliette had taken charge and was the person that organized everything. Peter and Sophie were impressed with her confidence and watched as she continued to make sure everything would be ready for diner. The newly weds were ushered to their table which faced the re-organized tables. Then as the food was being set out, buffet style, Sophie's parents, Peter's brother and Frank the original founder of Mount Horizon, all made speeches. Some of the graduated students also spoke. At last tables were called to begin dining.

"Peter this is my favourite food! How did you know?" Sophie gushed.

"It's my favourites too and this is all done by the kids. Amazing."

While the Cliff Hangers ate Daisy said, "Juliette instead of going to school for fashion, you should become a wedding planner. What you pulled off today, is amazing."

Shelby nodded, "there's good money in that too."

"I had fun doing this, so I just might do that. Thanks," Juliette said.

After diner was done everyone went back outside. This gave the Trackers time to move the tables and chairs, to set up the area for dancing. Outside in the pavilion, the lights were turned on, making it very romantic in the evening darkness. Peter and Sophie began their first dance, with their friends watching.

"This reminds me of the night you proposed," Peter whispered in her ear. "Together under the stars, among the people we love."

"No meteor shower, but my wish came true, so I don't have to put it on a star." Sophie said and then kissed him.

Whistles and cheers made them both smile. "They are our children, we just don't have to deal with diapers and wiping their bums. But we still hold their hands, are their shoulder to cry on and feel the bitter sweet joy when they grow and move on."

Sophie nodded and then giggled when he swept her into a low dip, making the cameras go off like they were celebrities. The next dance they shared with everyone. Then Peter went to talk to Frank.

"I'm proud of you Peter, you've made this place a home for lost souls. You've honoured my son, my wife and me in a way that I can't even put into words."

"It's that legacy that I'm glad I'm a part of. You saved me Frank, a long time ago. These kids saved me and I work to save them."

They talked a little longer and then Frank said good-bye. After Peter came back, he looked for his wife. She was dancing with some of the girls and guys from the Ridge Runners. The band stopped playing and put away their instruments, signalling everyone that it was time to go back into the main lodge, to continue the party there.

The Cliff Hangers stayed behind to stack up the ceremony chairs and clean up. While they did this, Chris nodded to Shelby that it was time to sneak off with Scott. At the shed, Shelby took Scott's hand and led him towards her dorm.

"Shelby what are we doing?"

"You'll see," she said mysteriously.

They walked into the dorm and saw that there was something over the lights, that cast the room in a romantic dim glow. As soon as Shelby pulled Scott over to her bed, he caught a clue. She kissed him with pent up desire, as she undid his tie and took off the tuxedo jacket. He unzipped her dress and she let it fall to the floor. She unbuttoned his shirt and he took off his belt. He kissed her all over, his lips tickling but at the same time sending shivers through her body. He let her undue his pants and they too fell to the floor. He stepped out of them and lifted her up, she wrapped her legs around him. Gently he moved them to her bed and lay her down, slowly lowering himself over her. They never broke eye contact. He caressed her skin and undid her bra. Their blood raced through them and their breathing became harsh. Her hands went to slide off his underwear, but he stilled them.

"Are you sure Shelby?" He asked.

"I love you Scott and I want you. I need you, but do you want to?"

He smiled, "I have wanted you for a long time. I need you too. I love you, all of you."

Shelby gave him the condom. They then let their passion and desire lead them to union. She couldn't believe that he was able to make her loose control and just trust him so completely. And he was amazed that she showed him the difference between sex and making love. Even in the short amount of time they were given, the intimacy they shared, was like nothing they'd ever experienced before. Once they rode the wave over the edge, they collapsed in each others arms, bodies entwined.

"We are united souls," Scott said kissing her neck. He drew a heart over hers.

"What is that?"

"My heart is in yours," he said softly.

"I never thought, never hope someone would love me like you do. I didn't know it could be like this. Thank you," Shelby said exposing her heart to him.

"Me too Shelby. I don't ever want to loose you."

A knock came and then Chris's voice reached them. "Hey love birds, you have five minutes to get out here. Clair is being stalled by Juliette, but she's looking for the two of you."

Romantic moment was gone. Scott and Shelby got dressed, fixed their hair and were outside carrying chairs, when the counsellor found them.

"This is the last of the chairs," Scott said a little breathless.

As Shelby walked by the lit fire pit, she dropped a tissue wrapped condom into the fire. All evidence destroyed. Scott took her hand and Shelby winked at Chris. Scott went to get refreshments for them.

"So did you get that stollen moment that you wanted?" Chris asked.

"Yes, thank you. He took my breath away. Now let's dance!"


	10. Chapter 10

_** Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise**__- Victor Hugo, Les Miserables_

CHAPTER #10

After the wedding, things went back to the usual routine. Sophie was selling her trailer, so that they could buy a new truck for the campus. Their honeymoon was delayed, because Shelby needed them both for the next few months. It was time to prepare her for court. Her stepfather was trying to get out of the child molestation charges against him. The darkness that had lifted, came rushing back to her. It was Scott, Daisy, Chris and Peter who kept her from drowning in it.

The talks with Chris helped both of them. Daisy kept Shelby centred and focused on exposing Walt. Scott and Peter were where she felt safest. Scott's arms calmed her and his kisses soothed her soul. Together Shelby became a force to be reckoned with. But the process of preparation for court, also drew out her hate for her mother. That was something that only one on one sessions with Peter, allowed her to control.

As the court date for the Grand Jury Review approached, Shelby asked if Daisy and Scott could come with them. Since it was a closed court, they couldn't be in the courtroom, but they could wait outside. Sophie would stay with them, while Peter would be inside with Shelby. The Prosecutor had skipped the preliminary hearings, so that Shelby and her sister wouldn't be as traumatized.

The prosecutor was providing evidence to the grand jury and that included testimony from Jessica and Shelby. Jess fell apart on the stand, so it was up to Shelby to convince the jury what a monster Walt was. The things she described, made almost all of the jurors tear up. The entire time, Peter held her eye contact. Her mother also testified, but she couldn't look at anyone. The whole process took three days, due to the judge allowing recess time when Shelby broke down. When all the testimony was heard, then the jury went away to decided on their judgement. They didn't take long to issue the criminal indictment.

"We the jury unanimously find the defendant guilty as charged with child molestation and two counts of sexual abuse." The sentence was applied.

Shelby broke down and cried in Peter's arms. The judge dismissed the jury and then slammed the gravel to get order in the court. "The protection of children is paramount and sexual abuse of any kind will not be tolerated by this court. Mrs. Alice Merrick Blaine, I am charging you with failing to report sexual child abuse suspicions. You will be given a suspended sentence of two years where you will perform probation. Once this period has been completed, this court will review the case again. Until such time, custody of Jessica and Shelby Merrick will be granted to Peter and Sophie Scarbrow of Mount Horizon School. This court is adjured."

Shelby said joyously, "Jess gets to stay with us!"

Peter thanked their lawyer and shook hands. Even the lawyer was impressed with the verdict. "Now you know why I was so happy with the judge we drew. I didn't even have to petition for the girls' custody."

They walked out of the courtroom and Child Services let Jess run over to her sister. They hugged and then everyone joined in for a group hug. Peter had to go with his lawyer and the Child Services agent to fill out the paperwork.

"Jess you get to stay with us at Mount Horizon. Peter and Sophie have custody of us. You don't have to live in THAT house any more," Shelby explained.

"Really? You mean it?" Jess said still unable to believe her.

"For two years, while mom's on probation. She got charged for not reporting sexual child abuse suspicions. Then this same judge will review custody at that time." Shelby explained to her sister, Scott and Daisy.

"That judge is great, a man with true moral ethics." Daisy said in her usual dry manner.

As the court emptied, their mother tried to approach them, but the lawyer and Sophie intervened. Shelby ignored her mother and Jess just watched her walk away. Peter returned and hugged Shelby again.

"Okay everyone, ready to go home?" He asked.

Scott piped up, "can we eat first, I'm so hungry."

"Celebratory diner sounds good. How about burgers, soda and fries?" Sophie asked, winking at Peter.

"Can I have a milk shake instead?" Shelby asked.

"Me too," Scott said.

"I'll have a root beer float," Jess added.

"Coke for me," Daisy said, "looks like I'm the normal one."

Peter grinned, "this one time, yes, everyone can have what they want. You all earned it."

They drove to the restaurant in the new minivan and put in their orders. Scott was surprised that Shelby ordered almost the same thing. "You like double bacon cheese burgers and onion rings too?"

Shelby grinned, "not like, love. But I'll stick to a normal chocolate milk shake."

"Hey don't knock my chocolate and cherry shake until you try it," Scott said. When it came, he let her do just that.

"Not bad, but I prefer mine," she said, holding his hand under the table.

Daisy was listening to Peter explain what happened in court, to Sophie. "So because the judge gave their mom a suspended sentence she can't appeal it right?"

Peter nodded yes, since his mouth was full of burger.

"That means for sure, Jess and Shelby stay at Mt. Horizon two more years?"

"That's right," Sophie answered.

"Sweet," Daisy accepted, finishing her fries.

The drive home was a long one, everyone fell asleep except for Sophie and Peter. That surprised the adults, because the teenagers all had been given sugar at diner.

"It's the stress of the day. I'm sure none of them really slept these last three days," Peter said.

"We were lucky this time," Sophie smiled.

"Luck was on our side for sure. Those two girls can finally get some closure and work towards getting better."

"Do you think they will ever forgive the parents?" Sophie asked.

"Maybe, only time will tell for that."


	11. Chapter 11

_** Anger blows out the lamp of the mind.**__- Robert G. Ingersoll_

CHAPTER #11

The office got a phone call from Veronica Marvins, a senior picked up the line. Peter was in a session with Mark and had asked not to be disturbed. Sophie was in town and all the other counsellors were off site with group activities. One of the high school's senior girl's who worked in the office, tried to take a message, but Veronica insisted on talking to Christine. So the senior sent Ezra to find Chris. Five minutes later Chris took the call. The office girl gave her some privacy.

"It's me what do you want," Chris said bluntly.

"Did they tell you yet that after you graduate you're on your own?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm paying for Mount Horizon, but that's it. I don't want you around. Your old boss called and said you stole money from them. That's it Christine, we're done."

Chris felt rage building inside her, "screw you." She slammed down the phone and left the office.

Ezra saw her face and said, "what's wrong Chris?"

"Nothing. I'm really mad Ezra and I don't want to hurt you. So just back off," Chris warned.

"Okay relax," Ezra said, stepping aside.

Chris was so mad, that her skin felt like it was on fire. As she passed Daisy, the girl said something sarcastic to her, but she barely heard it. Rage seethed through her and she blacked out. She headed for the woods, that lead to the water. But instead of taking the path, she went through the bush. Chris took off her shirt and let the branches scratch her, one branch snapped back like a whip, she didn't feel it. The branches battered her body, bruising, whipping, scratching. Her skin began to bleed, but her rage drove her forward.

Scott and Shelby were making out by the lake, when he drew back. "Did you hear that?"

"What?" Shelby said, trying to kiss him again.

"Something is in the bushes across from us," Scott said trying to see if it was a bear.

Shelby's hands went up his shirt and under his waist band. He lost interest in the noises of the forest. All he could think about was Shelby and how she made him feel. He kissed her neck and caressed her skin, making her groan and push up against him.

Chris broke through the bush, tripped on a branch, falling on a rock that ripped through her jeans, slashing her thigh. But her mind was gone. When she fell into the water, she didn't regain control, just began to wade further out. She was numb to everything.

"Okay, I heard that. Something or someone just made a splash in the water. Let's go check it out," Shelby said.

They fixed their cloths and headed towards the water. Shelby realized it was Chris in the water, "what is she doing?"

"Why isn't she wearing a shirt? Hey CHRIS!" Scott shouted.

The girl in the water turned slightly and they saw her damaged skin. But they also saw the vacant look on her face. Her eyes expressed her anger.

"Do you know CPR if she goes under? I don't," Shelby said. She realized something was very wrong.

Scott nodded, "what the hell is going on?"

"I don't know but I'm going to get help. Stay here and try to get her to come back to shore or something." Shelby ran off down the path.

Chris went a little deeper, the water dragged at her clothing. If she kept going, all her pain, all her anger, everything would finally end. She wouldn't have to struggle anymore. No one could disappoint her or abandon her. Mike might miss her, but he'd get over it. That's the kind of person he was. She was up to her neck in the water.

Scott took off his shoes and shirt, in case he had to go in and get her. "Come on Chris, don't do this!" He called out to her, hoping Shelby would bring help soon.

Shelby came running across campus. "I need help, someone find a counsellor!"

Daisy got up and so did Ezra, "what's wrong?" They said in unison.

"Chris she's lost her mind or something. Where's Sophie or Peter?"

"Sophie's in town, Peter's in his office," Ezra said.

"Daisy go get some blankets and head down to the water, the path that goes to the rope swing," Shelby said to her friend.

Shelby ran into the main lodge and to Peter's office. She knocked twice and barged in. "Sorry Mark, but it's an emergency. Peter come quick!"

"What's going on Shelby?" Mark asked standing up, sensing her urgency.

"It's Chris, she's lost it. She's in the river, I think she might drown. Scott is trying to get her to come back."

"Mark grab the first aide kit on the wall." Peter directed and they all ran out the door.

Shelby pointed to the path, "hurry Peter!" She was out of breath.

Mark and Peter sprinted down the path, they passed Daisy carrying the blankets. They were almost there, when they heard a splash. Scott dove into the water and swam out. He was doing a fast crawl. He dove down twice, before he got his arm around Chris and pulled her into shore. Then began CPR. Peter and Mark arrived then and Peter took over the chest compressions.

"Come on Chris, come back to us," Mark said.

"Don't give up," Daisy added, having finally arrive with Shelby.

Finally Chris began to cough, water shot out of her nose and mouth. Then her body began to spasm with shock.

"Daisy the blanket please," Peter said.

Daisy gave one blanket to Peter. The other she gave to Scott, who sat back in relief.

"What happened?" Peter asked, having noticed the bruising and marks on her body.

Ezra had finally caught up to his other Cliff Hangers and heard the question. "She had a call in the office. She was super angry when she came out and told me to get out of her way."

Daisy added, "she walked towards the woods and disappeared."

"We were in the woods and heard something in the bushes, but didn't see anything. When we heard the splash, we had to go see if it was an animal or something. Then we saw it was Chris." Shelby explained, picking up Scott's shirt and shoes, handing them to him.

"Her body was covered in scratches and bleeding. I called out to her and she just kept going deeper into the water. Shelby went to get help. The rest you know," Scott said.

"Okay everyone, let's go back to the lodge. I need to get her to the nurse." Peter picked up Chris, who had stopped shaking.

Scott put on his shoes. On the way back down the path, Ezra found Chris's shirt at the outskirts of the woods. "She took it off on purpose. She wanted the branches to hurt her."

Peter looked at him and then the girl in his arms. Her eyes were closed, but he knew she was conscious. "Ezra did she say what the call was about?"

"No, but the office girl did say it was her sister on the phone."

"Dammit," Peter swore.

The Cliff Hangers all looked at him, but didn't ask any questions. They all waited outside of the nurse's office for him to come back out with Chris. He came back out, but not with their friend.

"The nurse needs to treat her wounds. Scott you should get cleaned up. I'm proud of you. You're the reason she's alive. You saved her life," Peter hugged him.

The group hugged them both. Mark had stayed too and joined the Cliff Hangers in their hugging. They took comfort from each other. Then slowly let go. Shelby went with Scott to his dorm and waited for him to come back out.

"If we hadn't been in the woods…" Shelby began but couldn't finish.

Scott nodded and they hugged again. "It's bad, whatever that call was, it was really bad."

Daisy walked up with Juliette and Auggie. "They'll put Chris on suicide watch. I'm going to volunteer to stay up with her," Juliette said. "Just like Kat did with me."

"Ezra and Mark are still waiting for them to bring Chris out of the nurse station," Daisy said.

"Juliette can you go get Chris her sweatpants and hoodie. I'm sure they'll have taken off the wet clothing."

"Okay, I'll be right back. Auggie wait for me?"

"Sure Twig," he said back. "You guys go on, we'll be there in a minute."

Chris had her eyes open, but Peter and the nurse could see that she wasn't mentally back yet. A knock at the door and Juliette gave them the fresh cloths.

"Thanks Juliette. I'll be right out to talk to you guys. We'll do group," Peter said.

The nurse closed the curtain and helped Chris put the clothing on. It was like she was on auto pilot. Peter put his arm around her and lead her out. He went to his office and found everyone had set up for group and waited on them. Chris sat down.

Ezra didn't wait for Peter. "Chris what happened?"

He had to ask her twice. She blinked a few times and then looked around, like she had just come awake from sleeping. "What?"

"What happened? What did your sister say to you?"

Peter saw her shut down with the second question. But Chris did answer her friend, "I don't remember."

They filled her in on the rest. Everyone expressing their feelings of what her actions had caused them to go through. Chris said she was sorry and thanked Scott. After the group session was over, it was time for lunch. From a distance Peter watched her go through all the motions. She did eat, but he saw that she had become very detached. He had already guessed that Veronica must have told her that she didn't want her around either. Her friend Mike had warned him, that Chris would react badly. He should have told her sooner, but with the trial, wedding and everything, it had completely slipped his mind. Chris had been doing so well, talking to him about the assault and rape. But this was a huge set back. She was back to not talking. She was almost as bad as when she'd arrived.


	12. Chapter 12

_** Let them think what they like, but I didn't mean to drown myself. I meant to swim till I sank- but that's not the same thing.**__- Joseph Conrad, The Secret Sharer and other stories_

CHAPTER #12

Peter cancelled all the Cliff Hanger's duties and gave them free time, to deal with what had happened to Chris. He saw Chris go to the art room. She was drawing and then began painting. Peter hoped she was releasing whatever had caused her mental break, via the art. Auggie came up beside him.

"I'll keep an eye on her Peter, I've got a project to finish myself."

"Thanks Auggie. I need to go call her sister and find out what was said. I'll check in with you in a while." Peter left them alone.

Auggie tried to get Chris to talk to him, but she remained mute. So he focused on his own work. When he was done, he checked out what she was working on.

"Wow Chris that's really good," he praised.

She shrugged and continued painting. When he said he was around if she wanted to talk, she nodded. Juliette came and they left. Peter returned and sat in a chair near Chris.

"I talked to your sister. I'm sorry she said that to you."

Chris just ignored him and continued to paint. She was numb. For once in her life, she was numb without alcohol or drugs. She had always wanted to be numb, but now that she was, she wished she wasn't.

"Tell me what you were feeling when you ran into the woods," Peter probed.

Silence met his request. Just the sound of the brush on canvas. Eventually he gave up trying to get her to talk. Daisy and Ezra came by then and he went into the hall to talk to them.

"We'll watch her Peter," Ezra said.

Daisy added, "Sophie is back from town and is looking for you."

He thanked them and left to go find his wife.

Daisy and Ezra worked on an english assignment, while Chris painted. Ezra peaked at her work, knowing she hated anyone seeing it until her work was finished. He could see that she had painted a mountain and a person was standing on the mountain. The figure was far away, so you couldn't tell if it was male or female. The arms were spread wide. Then the spirt of the person seemed to leap off the mountain and into the air, then it turned into an eagle, which was soaring in the air. The eagle was large in the picture, as if it could fly off the canvas. The realism was fantastic. She was working on finishing the eagle, as the rest of the painting was done.

"Chris it's time for diner, you need to clean up."

Auggie went to help her and saw that her painting was done. It was the most awesome thing he had seen. "That is fantastic Chris. It's worthy of hanging in a gallery."

She looked at him and then turned the painting around and signed the back. Together they cleaned up her paints and brushes. Then washed up. Juliette and Auggie walked Chris to the diner line up. Sophie was there watching over them. Chris got food, but she wasn't hungry. Whenever Sophie looked at her, she made sure to have a fork in her mouth.

"Hey if you don't want your steak, I'll have it." Scott pushed his empty plate towards Chris. She exchanged plates. "Thanks, I'm still hungry."

She took the empty plate, making sure Sophie saw her. Then she left. Back at the art room, she took the dried canvas and went into the guy's dorm. She put it above Scott's bed. It was her way of saying thank you to him. Chris truly didn't remember anything after the phone call. It's what happened to her when her anger turned to rage. In the past she'd almost strangled a person to death, when it had happened. After that it took a lot to push her over the edge of sanity. She left and returned to her own dorm. As expected Juliette waited for her and then they went back to the main lodge together.

The Cliff Hangers were doing homework. Shelby saw her coming and pulled out a chair between her and Scott. Chris put her math stuff down on the table. Like a robot she began to work at it. Unlike usual she didn't ask questions or for help. She did the work and then sat there. Scott and Shelby exchanged a look over her head. Scott slid her binder over to him and it was all wrong.

"Snap out of it Chris. We all have the world cave in on us. Don't let it destroy you," Shelby said, giving her tough love.

Chris nodded, "it's not my sister that made me loose it, but what she said he…. never mind." She looked at the corrections Scott made. "Thanks." She closed her books, got up and sat in the easy chair by the fire, just staring into it.

"She's a mess. At least when I cracked, I was still talking," Juliette observed.

"Everyone's different Jules," Ezra said. He got up and went to sit with Chris.

Daisy was still angry at Chris for David leaving. "Jules is right, she's such a drama queen."

Chris heard her and stood up, walked over to Daisy and said in a dead voice, "I didn't send David away, he did that to himself. Take your head out of the sand." Then she turned around and walked back to her seat.

Daisy looked at Auggie and Juliette, "that was creepy, even for me."

Scott and Shelby finished their work and then left. As they walked back to her dorm first, he said, "I don't think I've ever been so angry that I blacked out."

"Not me either. That's really scary. She's got issues that go deeper than just her assault and rape," Shelby said. "That's a lot to carry. No wonder she's nuts."

They walked over to the boy's dorm and Shelby waited outside. Scott came out and showed her the painting. "Look at the name on the back."

"Chris gave you this? Wow that's awesome. There's some hope for her yet," Shelby said.

He put it back in his room and when he came back out, Peter was talking to Shelby. "I'd like to see you both in my office."

On the way there, Scott told him about the painting Chris had left him. Shelby told him what Chris had said about the phone call. "She said it was what he said, not her sister that made her mad."

"Thanks guys. Now have a seat, we need to have a talk and it's not about Chris." Peter waited until they both sat down. "It didn't slip my mind that you two were alone in the woods together. Now before you make up some story, know that in the past I have supported your relationship as long as it didn't interfere with school rules."

"We were just getting some alone time. Nothing happened," Scott said.

Shelby added, "we were going for a walk. When we do that anywhere else, someone always interrupts us talking. Like Auggie or Ezra or Chris."

"Alright. I just don't want to have to separate you two. Make sure you follow school rules. That said, thank you for helping Chris. She seems to be responding well to you two."

Scott said it best, "we all need someone to lean on."

"Peter, how is it that she can't remember going through the woods or anything up until the nurse?" Shelby asked.

"Some people experience extreme anger, known as rage. The adrenaline spikes, among other hormones. It's caused by feeling threatened or from a traumatic event, it's like an emergency reaction that normally results in violence. In Chris's case, she inflicted it on herself. A lot of people suppress their anger until it explodes." Peter explained to them.

"I think she suppressed a lot more than just her anger. But I can understand that," Shelby replied. "She's going to be here a long time."

"Can you send Chris in to see me?" Peter asked as the pair got up to leave.

They nodded and did just that. As they escorted Chris to his office, Scott said, "thanks for the painting it's great."

"Even if it doesn't always seem like it; thanks for saving my life." Chris said and went into Peter's office.

Chris sat down in a chair. She couldn't look at Peter. She was sorry for loosing it, but that she had no control over. Her rage black out was something she could never control.

"Chris how are you feeling?"

She shrugged not really sure.

Peter came and sat in front of her, like he would for their normal one on one sessions. "Are your cuts healing okay?"

She lifted her shirt a little to show him that most had scabbed up. Where the branches had whipped and bruised her, that would take longer to heal.

"So your sister has abandoned you also. Why does that make you so angry?"

"It doesn't. I expected that and I just don't care. That's not why I got so mad," Chris said looking at her hands.

Peter waited for her to elaborate. He watched her fidget and struggle with telling him.

"The manager had warned me, that if I told anyone what happened, he'd charge me with theft. I never stole anything. I did everything he wanted, even when…." she stopped talking suddenly.

He wanted to keep her talking, so he asked, "when was the first time you got so angry you blacked out?"

"I guess when I was five. It was kindergarden and some girl was teasing me. I told her to stop three times and she continued. I told the teacher on duty to keep her away from me and she didn't. I warned her again, then I got so mad I couldn't think. I guess I blacked out, because when I regained my mind, people were prying my hands off the girl's neck."

"Have you hurt yourself before, when in a rage?" Peter asked.

"One other time. I came home with bruises. I try to leave the situation before I hit my rage point. It takes a lot to get me that angry."

Now he brought it back to what had happened. "Tell me the truth about how much your family abandoning you hurts you."

She looked at him and he saw so much pain in her eyes. "I can't I don't want to feel anything, that's easier. How I feel about my family, I've dealt with by telling Mike."

Peter was just glad she was talking again, so he didn't push her. He explained how to calm herself by breathing slowly. "If you breath in and hold it a few seconds and then breath out slowly, it forces your body to slow down. Roll your shoulders back three or four times, then repeat it forward, that releases tension. If you can lie on your back and close your eyes. Imagine that every part of your body is relaxing with each exhale. Picture it starting at your toes and ending at the tip of your head. If you can't do that, find a way to release the anger constructively. Go for a run, play basketball, refocus on something other than what upset you in the first place."

"Okay," she said, then went back to being mute.

"Alright you can go," Peter said.

She hugged him suddenly, like he was anchoring her to the world. It surprised him, but showed that he was getting through to her again. She let go and quickly left, before he had a chance to say anything more.

Chris bumped into Mark, "sorry."

Mark cracked a smile. "So how are you doing, since your dunking?"

She rolled her eyes at him. "This is my best bruise," she showed him the bruise that was across her ribs.

"That's from the forest right?" Mark asked.

Chris nodded, then blurted. "I'm bisexual. Some girls I like, but mostly guys."

He frowned at her, "why are you telling me this?"

"'Cause that's what you are. And it's okay. So what if we like to enjoy the best of both worlds."

"But I'm not like them. I don't have a lisp. I like football and hockey. I hate shopping and fashion."

"You don't have to be a stereotypical homosexual. The only thing we, as bisexuals, have to remember, is that not everyone we like will reciprocate. Some guys, like Scott for example, are just straight. It's like religion. You can't push it on other people, they believe what they believe."

"Mark why does it make you so angry?"

"I don't know. Maybe because my dad is a homophobe. My parents don't know what I am."

"Same here. They don't know me at all. But getting angry about who you are attracted to, doesn't change who you are. Neither will beating on people."

"How is it that you can make so much sense now, but a while ago you were a rage freak?" Mark asked Chris.

"Because it's easier to fix other peoples problems than my own."

Mark nodded at that. "I just get angry when they call me names and then it's like a switch turns off in my head and I want to beat them up. But I don't go nuts like you do, no offence."

"No offence taken. I know I'm a nut. I should've been born a squirrel," Chris said.

Sophie walked by and over heard them, "neither of you are nuts. It's about learning how to deal with your emotions and feelings. Both of you stop thinking and just react. So next time count to ten, breath deeply and analyze how you're feeling."

"I know how I am feeling, I'm pissed off." Mark said with passion.

"Okay then go chop wood, just don't chop your own foot off. Focus on what you're doing." Sophie smiled and nodded towards the wood pile.

Chris said she'd help him. They talked while he chopped and she stacked the wood. He finally talked to her about how he found out he liked guys. She listened, saying little, but he didn't mind. Their friendship grew. At diner time, he deserted his group and came to sit with Chris. She was by herself, playing with her food. Mark ate some of her food, so Sophie wouldn't get on her case.

Ezra saw them talking. He was a little jealous of Mark, because Chris hadn't been talking to any of the Cliff Hangers lately. Even though he still had feelings for Daisy, Chris had been his friend first. He was tired of girls leaving him behind for other guys. Everyone always forgot about him.


	13. Chapter 13

_** A true friend doesn't jump with you, they catch you when you fall.**__- Unknown_

CHAPTER #13

Both Daisy and Chris felt Ezra's resentment towards them. Whenever they came around, he left or ignored them. Daisy made a comment and he replied back, "what do you care?"

As for Chris, she was still numb. Working with Mark had helped, but he had done most of the talking. Before her break down, she might have worked harder to find out why Ezra was upset, but right now she didn't care. She had no appetite and had to force herself to eat, when someone was watching. But often, she was able to just dump her plate. Once Sophie thought the dumped food was Juliette's and took her to have her weight checked. Which of course, when Juliette checked out to be fine, the counsellor grew concerned because she couldn't figure out who had not eaten.

Peter received a phone call from David's mother, she was very upset and rightly so. The General had forced his son into the military and during a live amo training session, David opened fire on the General, wounding him. The truly tragic thing, was that David turned the gun on himself and committed suicide. David's mother had a letter that her son had left for Daisy and another for Peter. She asked if she could deliver it in person. Peter of course accepted and she'd arrive later that day. He knew he'd have to break the news to the Cliff Hangers, sooner than later.

"I need the Cliff Hangers to come to my office once you are done with lunch," Peter said to their group.

Chris got up and followed him, so did Juliette and Auggie. Daisy, Shelby and Scott came last. They sat down in a circle and waited for Peter to explain why he'd called them to his office for a group session.

"David's mother called. There's been a tragic incident. David used a gun on the General and then committed suicide. His mother will be coming this afternoon. He left a letter for myself and for you Daisy." Peter explained sadly, watching their reactions.

Scott rubbed his eyes and said, "the kid was messed up like the rest of us, but he was okay some times too."

Daisy said, "it's your fault Chris, it's all your fault that he's dead!" She jumped out of her chair and attacked Chris. Screaming and pushing her, before Peter could stop her.

Chris crumpled in pain and fell on the floor. Daisy had hit the big bruise that still hadn't healed. But she felt nothing else, no emotions. Shelby and Scott went to her and asked if she was okay. She nodded and they helped her back into her chair.

Ezra was fed up, "Daisy it wasn't on Chris. Open your eyes, David was a jerk. He was as big of a bully as his father was to me and to Chris. He didn't let Peter or any of the counsellors help him. He didn't want help. So sit down and shut up."

Peter hand not expected any of this type of reaction. Daisy was always so calm and cool, Ezra never confronted people, instead he took the pain into himself. But the most alarming was that Chris had shown no emotion.

"Peter you can let me go. I won't do anything. Sorry Chris," Daisy said. "I'm just angry I guess at the General and even his mother. His mother should've fought harder to save her son. Ezra said it best, the General was a bully. I bet he's relieved David is dead."

Juliette had tears running down her face, "it's good that he had Scott and you Daisy as friends. I remember when he tossed the football around with Scott, he was good. It's so sad."

Auggie asked, "what about you Peter, how do you feel?"

"Sad that David felt that his only choice was to take his life," Peter admitted.

Chris spoke in a monotone voice, "you can't save all of us."

"At least you tried Peter. I remember when the General took him away, you begged his dad not to take him. It's not on you what happened," Shelby said.

"Thanks Shelby. But this isn't about how I'm feeling, let's talk about how you feel. How about you Auggie?" Peter asked.

"I guess I'm sad. Like Ezra said, David liked to get in your face and push your buttons."

Juliette said, "but that doesn't mean he deserved to die."

Peter looked around the circle, "what about you Chris?"

She said nothing, just shrugged her shoulders.

Daisy asked, "I know I have to clean toilets or something for pushing Chris. But can I see his mom when she comes? I want to go to his funeral."

"Let me talk to his mother first and then we'll see. And yes you have toilettes to clean all week." Peter added, "anyone else want to say something more?"

They all just sat there in silence.

"Alright you guys can go. Chris I'd like you to stay behind please."

They put away the chairs and went out the door. Shelby closed it as she was the last one out. She looked at Chris and then at Peter and sighed.

"Chris we need to take you to the nurse and have that bruise looked at," Peter said.

She stood up to follow him and had to hold on to the desk, as she got light headed. He came to her side immediately, full of concern. She shrugged him off and went with him to the nurse. All she wanted was to be left alone, but that wasn't going to happen. When the nurse checked her out, she pulled Peter outside her office.

"She's lost some weight. The fainting spell that you just told me about, that's not from her bruise, it's from not eating. The bruise and her cuts are healing well."

Peter thanked her. They'd have to watch Chris even more closely than before. He couldn't handle loosing another child. The Cliff Hangers had been through too much lately and were falling apart. Their trust in each other had disintegrated. They needed to go outside and rebuild their faith in each other. Tomorrow was the weekend and he'd take them on an overnight kayak trip, that would force them to rely on each other.

He had noticed Ezra's hostility and had a one on one session scheduled with him for that evening. There was something more than just David, bothering the boy. Before him was a similar session with Daisy. Peter talked to his wife Sophie about everything that happened. She told him about the food in the garbage and having thought it was Juliette's food, not realizing it was Chris. They found comfort momentarily in each other's arms, before he got a call that Mrs. Ruxton had arrived.

As expected, David's mother was emotional and she didn't stay long. She advised due to a military investigation, her son's body was not being released for a civilian funeral. After giving Peter the letters, and thank him for trying to save her son, she left. He read the letter from David and found it was almost like a confession. David had written everything had had never been able to say when he was at Mount Horizon high school. He revealed that the General had used physical force in the past to discipline him. David admitted he wished he had let Peter help him, when he had the chance.

The letter to Daisy was included in his envelope, but he didn't read it. Instead he called Daisy into his office and explained about Mrs. Ruxton leaving and that there was no funeral to go to. Finally Peter gave her the letter. He waited patiently while she read it. Tears pooled in her eyes and then slowly fell down her cheek. When she was done, she traded the box of tissues for the letter.

"Please read it Peter," she said almost in a whisper.

In her letter, David thanked Daisy for being a friend and giving him a chance. For giving him one of the few things that he had to smile about. David talked about dancing with her at the MORP and learning to work with Scott on their buddy hike. Then David said good-bye.

"How do you feel about what he said in his letter?" Peter asked Daisy.

Instead of making him turn around back to back, for once she let him see her face. She didn't hide from him. "I'm happy and sad at the same time. I'm glad we were friends and he took comfort in that, but sad that he gave up. But most of all I am angry and I hate his father."

He helped her work through her feelings and they made a lot of progress with how she was handling her friend's death. It was the most that Daisy had ever allowed Peter to see her vulnerability. At the end of the session, she felt relieved for having talked to him about it all.

"I am finally understanding what you meant by life being ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it. But cleaning toilets for a week, will never be something I'm happy to do," Daisy said as she left Peter's office.

Next was Ezra's one on one session and he made Peter work hard to get his feelings out. He was mad at Chris, Daisy and David. First they tackled the anger with David. They probed why Ezra was angry with the girls. His friendship with the two girls had become strained and he didn't trust that they cared about him anymore. Peter knew of Ezra's crush on Daisy, it was one of the reasons Ezra had disliked David. They were teenagers, with normal hormonal reactions, but rejection was handled a lot differently. Try as he would, Peter couldn't prevent them from going through that pain. So he tried to teach them how to be comfortable with who they were and to love themselves first. Their relationships and interaction with each other, sometimes helped with the healing process and sometimes hindered it.

Shelby, Scott, Juliette and Auggie were all doing well, learning how to handle their past. Being more open with other people and the rest of the Cliff Hangers was something new with Shelby. Having her sister on campus, also help with her healing process. Scott's school work and athletic skill were back on track. He helped his team a lot more than when he had first arrived. Juliette was more confident and no longer expelled her food when she was upset. Auggie's reading and writing improved every day. These kids would graduate in the near future and be able to cope with life. Ezra, Daisy and Chris had a long way still to go.

The next day Peter advised them what to pack for their overnight camping excursion. For their group session they did an exercise for building trust. It was the classic one used, where the person has to fall backward and everyone catches them. Only Chris wouldn't do it. Chris was the last to go and while Ezra had everyone's attention, she took off.

"Where's Chris, it's her turn?" Auggie asked.

"Figures she'd take off," Daisy said dryly, "so much for facing your fears."

"I think this was more about trusting your peers," Ezra added.

Daisy rolled her eyes at him, but put her arm around his shoulders.

"Everyone stay here, I'll be right back with Chris," Peter said.

"That's what he thinks, but that's not what's going to happen," Scott grinned.

Ten minutes later, to everyone's surprise, Chris and Peter came back. She climbed up and stood with her back to everyone.

"We're ready when you are."

"If I jumped off a bridge, would you all jump with me?" Chris asked.

"If we're bungie jumping, then hell ya," Scott said enthusiastically.

Ezra asked, "why do you want to jump off a perfectly good bridge?"

Daisy snorted, "quit stalling."

Peter answered, "I'd be waiting at the bottom to catch you."

The others nodded and really thought about what he just said. One by one they nodded and agreed.

Scott whispered to Shelby, "I'd catch you, if I couldn't stop you from jumping."

The look in her eyes, was all he needed.

Without warning, Chris fell backward. She had expected to hit the ground, so when they caught her she got emotional. No longer numb, tears poured down her face. "Why?"

Shelby said simply, " because you're one of us Spaz."


	14. Chapter 14

_** The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.**__- Abraham Lincoln_

CHAPTER #14

The overnight trip would start out with a kayak trip down the river. The other Cliff Hangers were getting better at kayaking, than they were in the past. Scott helped Ezra and Auggie helped Juliette. Peter instructed Chris and as he predicted, she picked up the skill easily. Peter lead them and Scott was the safety, so he paddled beside them and helped if it was needed.

Sunlight caressed their faces and made the water glitter like diamonds. The longer they paddled the warmer it got. When they finally stopped it was afternoon. Kayaks were pulled up on to the rocks and inland and secured in a pile, so no chance they could fall into the river. After a short break they hiked into the bush. Their noisy trekking scared a deer and it leaped across the path, making everyone stop and watch it take off.

"There goes Bambi's mom," Ezra said.

Chris grinned, "one of my favourite Disney movies. Make me cry every time."

"Have you guys ever seen the movie Bambi meets Godzilla?" Daisy asked.

"No. What happens?" Chris asked.

Daisy grinned, "let's just say that Bambi ends up stomped."

Scott laughed as Chris rolled her eyes and said, "I'm not surprised you like that."

"Come on guys, head up the trail." Peter waited until they passed by him and then walked at the end of the line.

Juliette turned and walked backwards, "where are we going?"

"You'll see. You might want to turn around, you're about to trip over a stump," Peter replied.

She turned round just in time and walked a little faster to catch up to Auggie. Then she flashed him her pearly whites, "I don't know why I keep asking him. He never tells us does he?"

Auggie smiled back, "nope. You never know Jules he may tell us one day."

Ezra snorted, "not likely."

Chris let the couples walk in front of her. Daisy didn't want to walk beside her though and went a little faster to join Scott and Shelby. Peter took the opportunity to walk with Chris. When she talked to him, he wasn't expecting what she said.

"How do help people when they can't talk to you, because you rat to Child Services or the cops? I know you have to, so that you keep your license, but it seems counter productive. We're supposed to trust you with our darkest secrets, but we truly can't."

Shelby heard her and said, "you could always just tell authorities that you if Peter reports it."

Daisy added, "or stop protecting the people who hurt you and make them deal with the consequences."

Peter finally was going to say something, when Chris ended the conversation. "Never." She shut up and just walked in silence.

In the late afternoon, they arrived in the area that Peter wanted them to be in. "So you're lost in the wilderness, what's the first thing you do?"

"Build a shelter," Scott, Auggie and Juliette said at the same time.

Daisy, Shelby and Ezra rolled their eyes.

Chris looked around at the trees, picked two and dropped her pack. She began building her shelter, gathering branches. The others resigning to do what they had to, followed her lead. Peter watched them as he set up his tent and built the fire pit.

Ezra looked at Chris, "I thought you were a city girl."

"Grew up in the country. I was a tomboy and loved the outdoors."

"Ugh, that just makes me hate her even more," Daisy grumbled to Shelby.

Chris's shelter was a big branch braced between two trees and re-enforced by to Y shaped branches at the ends and one in the middle. She used a rock to pound them into the ground. Then she got other branches and leaned them against the main horizontal pole. Once satisfied with her roof, she got leafy branches and grass to weave and layer on top, in case it rained. Then she collected more grass to cover the floor. When she looked around, everyone else had either a teepee or some lean-to. Auggie's and Scott's shelters were comparable to hers. Not wanting to get stuck making diner and cleaning dishes, she began to work on starting a fire. She used two rocks at first to start the fire, then Peter gave her a knife, which created a spark faster. She gave it back, once the grass and twigs were lit.

"Fire's taken care of, you guys decide who's getting water, firewood and getting diner started," Peter said.

They split up to do their assigned chores. Peter got Chris to talk about her childhood. He noticed that she didn't once mention her parents. As everyone came to the fire pit to sit and wait for diner, they too contributed things about their childhood, except for Daisy and Shelby. After they ate and cleaned up, Peter gave everyone some free time, but he kept a closer eye on the couples. Later they had a group session, played a campfire game and then went to bed.

Chris woke up and had to go pee. She took her flashlight and went into the woods. On her way back she got some more firewood and put it on the pit. She was about to return to her shelter when she heard a crack noise behind her. Whirling around she was one shelter fall apart. Trying hard not to laugh, she watch Daisy crawl out from under the collapsed shelter. Daisy kicked the shelter and swore.

"Come on, you can sleep in mine. It has room for two," Chris invited. She didn't wait for a response, but could feel Daisy walking reluctantly behind her.

"Thanks," Daisy said crawling inside.

Chris gave her a pile of grass to shape into a pillow, then turned on her side. Daisy fussed a bit and then finally stopped moving. The girls lay back to back.

"What you said to Peter earlier about not being able to tell him everything…. what is it that you can't tell him?" Daisy asked.

At first her question was met with silence and then Chris said, "about my parents."

"Well?" Daisy prompted.

"My dad's temper was really bad. This one time I got beaten so bad, I couldn't sit on my ass for a week. They told the school that I had the flu. On my tenth birthday, I wanted my friends to stay longer and talked back to my mom. She broke a wooden cooking spoon, she beat my ass so hard. That's why I don't care that they're out of my life. But I know that my daddy issues are a part of my other issues."

Daisy rolled over and waited for Chris to face her. "My parents were drunks and ignored me. But that's nothing compared to what you, Scott and Shelby have been through. How many times have you tried to kill yourself?"

"Wow that's blunt….twice. Once here as you know and one time at home."

"How do you stay sane?"

Chris snorted, "I'm not sane, that's why I'm here. I try to live one day at a time."

"You could tell Peter everything. But when the investigators come, just tell them you lied if you don't want to follow through with it." Daisy advised.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Chris asked suddenly.

"You saved me from sleeping outside. Like you said tomorrow's another day, so I might be back to my old self then."

"Fair enough. Good night Daisy and thanks."

Peter had heard it all, having woken up when Daisy's shelter collapsed. He smiled when he heard the two girls getting along, but hearing about the other secret Chris was keeping, made him realize the extent of emotional pain she was carrying. If Chris could talk to her friends about her family problems, she might just heal herself. But he was glad that he knew why she had questioned his loyalty to the kids. At least this overnight trip was working, the Cliff Hangers were reuniting.


	15. Chapter 15

_** Life is not a matter of chance…it is a matter of choice.**__- Ka_

CHAPTER # 15

By the time they returned late Sunday afternoon from their kayaking trip, the Cliff Hangers were all getting along. Ezra, Chris and Daisy were joking around, even teasing each other. Peter was happy to be back as well, due to missing his wife Sophie. To follow the same rules as he asked of his kids, they waited until the curtains were drawn and his office door was closed, before caressing and kissing hello.

"How was everything while we were gone?" Peter asked his wife.

Sophie smiled, "as well as it ever is. The Trackers completed their solos, Mark is getting along with the males on his team, Sun Dogs and Ridge Runners finished building the new dorm. On Monday we have the electrician coming and the plumber on Wednesday."

"Wow, maybe I should go away more often," Peter teased her.

"What about you, how are the Cliff Hangers doing?" Sophie asked.

"Daisy, Ezra and Chris are finally getting along. The others are the same as always. And I found out that Chris is hiding family issues from me, because she's worried about the repercussions of me reporting it to the authorities."

"What family issues? How much more emotional hell can that girl carry?"

Peter shrugged. "I overheard her telling Daisy that her parents, yes both of them, would beat her badly as a form of discipline or punishment. She told Daisy that one time it was so bad she couldn't sit down for a week and they told the school she was sick with the flu."

Sophie looked horrified. "I'm guessing this was before her assault and rape? No wonder she turns her feelings off when there is even mention of her family."

He nodded. "I'm going to see what I can get out of her about her sister. It could explain a lot about their dynamic too."

"I wonder if that's why she sought approval by the older men in her life. Hence why they were able to manipulate her so easily," Sophie mused.

"Anyway, I need a hot shower, care to join me?" Peter asked nuzzling her neck.

"A few things to finish up and I'll meet you back at home," Sophie promised with a wink.

When his wife left, Peter got a phone call from Lawerance Hastings High School. "Hi Peter it's Bob. I was wondering if you have time to meet me in town tonight? I have a favour to ask."

"What time?"

"How's 8 pm? Diner on me, bring your wife too."

"Okay Bob, see you then."

Peter was definitely curious, it wasn't often that Bob asked him for a favour. On the way back to their house, Peter told Sophie about the phone call. She was equally intrigued, but like that they'd get a diner out of him for their presence.

"In the mean time I think we have a shower to get into?" Sophie said seductively.

Later that evening they joined Bob at Rusty O'Brien's restaurant. He waited until they were having desert, before he gave Peter some of ht back story of his favour. When he was done, he waited for Peter and Sophie's answer. Bob answered their questions and by the time diner was completely over, just before they said good night, an agreement was reached. Bob left with a huge smile on his face, he had gotten what he wanted.

"This could be just the good news that he needs, help him look towards the future. You have to admit Peter, he's come a long way in a short time. He deserves it," Sophie said.

"I hope we made the right choice. We'll tell him in the morning," Peter said.

When it was lunch time, Peter called Scott into his office. He would talk to him about it first and then if Scott agreed, then they'd tell the rest of the Cliff Hangers.

"Don't worry you're not in trouble, have a seat Scott," Peter reassured.

"What's up?"

Peter explained Bob's offer and Scott was excited for the first time in a long time. He didn't really believe it, until he was shown the football jersey he'd be wearing.

"Bob will pick you up after school and drop you off after practice. If everything goes well, we'll even take the rest of the Cliff Hangers to see you play at your first game. But your grades can't slide either."

Scott had tears in his eyes. "Thank you Peter," he choked out.

Peter hugged him. "You've proven yourself here and circumstance gives you the choice to work towards the future."

"Did Bob say how the position became available?" Scott asked.

"Mountain biking accident, he broke his leg in two places."

"Ouch, what's that two to six months to heal? So he's out until next season?"

"Pretty much. You'll meet with him, the team captain and the coach first. If they approve, then you start practice on Thursday," Peter explained.

"Can Mark toss me the ball, so I can practice before I meet them?" Scott asked.

"Go share your news and I'll talk to Mark," Peter said.

Scott went to find Shelby first and give her his news. She ended being with everyone else, so he told everyone at once. They asked more questions than he had answers to, but they all were supportive.

"Well if you need someone to run sprints with, I volunteer to do that with you." Chris offered and gave him a high-five.

"Thanks, any help is welcome. First I talk to them, then they'll try me out."

Peter joined them. "Mark's on board and so is Roger. I'll talk to a few of the other guys that like to play football from the other groups."

"Roger's a cornerback if I recall. He took me down a few times when I first got here," Scott recalled.

"When do they come here to interview him Peter?" Shelby asked.

"Tomorrow, after school."

Auggie took the football out of Peter's hands, "then let's get started. Peter you toss it and we'll try to take him down. Come on Cliff Hangers!"

"Nice try, but you all have afternoon classes to get to. Meet back here after your chores are done," Peter said.

Mark saw them as he came out from the main building. "Congratulations Scott!" He said as he jogged over.

"Nothing's for sure yet, but thanks."

Shelby touched his face, "no doubt in our minds that you've got the position. You just have to believe in yourself, like we all do."

"I can't wait to get off this campus and go see him play his first game!" Chris said enthusiastically.

"Classes people, go on." Peter said, breaking them up.

Sophie stood beside him as they watched the teens head to class. "Scott's got a lot of work ahead of him."

"Either this will be the best thing for him, or the worst. Only time will tell," Peter said. "Join me for lunch?"

She smiled, "I thought you'd never ask."


	16. Chapter 16

_** The past has no power over the present moment.**__- Eckhart Tolle_

CHAPTER # 16

The coach, captain and person he was replacing on the football team of Lawrence Hastings High School, all approved of Scott. Then they tested his skills. As it turned out the captain was also the quarterback. So with the practice team that Peter assembled, and their quarterback, Scott was tested. They threw various patterns from their play book. Scott caught every ball, he got taken down by Roger once and Mark intercepted one ball, only to have Scott tackle him instantly. Once that was done, the coach tested his speed. Peter had Chris and Mark join Scott and the quarterback to do sprints. The coach was impressed with everyone.

"I'm glad this district doesn't allow mixed teams, otherwise I think you'd have a football team here that would stomp us."

"Thanks Ralf, so are we going to talk about schedules for Scott?" Peter asked.

The coach looked at Bob, who nodded. Then he shook Scott's hand, "you're on the team son."

"Thanks coach," Scott said returning the handshake. Then the quarterback and the player he was replacing, congratulated him.

Once Peter and Roger left, Shelby gave Scott a kiss and the Cliff Hangers all showed their support. The quarterback walked over to Chris and chatted with her.

"I'm Cord Sandleback and you're one of the fastest girls I know. You'd kick our girls' ass if you ran against them," he flirted.

She grinned, "thanks. I use to do track and field at my old school."

Cord turned to Scott and said, "if she's pushing you to sprint faster and you perform like you did today consistently, then we'll win the 3A state title this year for sure."

"How many games have you guys won already?" Auggie asked.

"It's 15 straight until Myles Jacobs here, busted up his leg."

"When's the next game?" Scott asked.

"Next week on Friday, but at least it's a home game."

"That's not much time to get your team use to him," Juliette said.

Myles grinned, "nope. But Scott's better than me, so they'll be thrilled."

"Not to many people would admit something like that," Chris said.

"Truth is truth," Myles said simply.

Daisy was impressed. "What planet did you come from?"

Everyone laughed and then Cord toss the football around with Mark and Scott until his coach, Bob and Peter returned.

"It's all been worked out. You join their practice tomorrow Scott after classes are done. Bob will come and pick you up," Peter informed.

"We'll have your gear and jersey ready when you arrive," the coach said. "Welcome to team Timberwolves!"

After the Lawrence Hastings people left, they celebrated Scott making the team. Peter allowed everyone that had helped him do this and all the Cliff Hangers to have some ice cream. For Scott it was one of the best days of his life. He knew there would be a lot of work to do, but was thrilled that Peter was letting his friends come to his first game.

Chris asked Ezra, "so how often to people get to do this type of thing?"

"What go off campus?"

"Yes."

Ezra grinned, "some people get the opportunity either for sports or working. Like Katherine who was a former Cliff Hanger, she worked at the local old age home. Then she graduated and went to college. It helps with college applications. But it takes a lot to get to that point. Good grades, personal progress, responsibility, all that stuff."

Juliette overheard and asked, "why, where do you want to go Chris?"

"Cord mentioned a local marathon run."

Daisy said, "miracles have happened in the past."

"My math marks still suck, even when I try," Chris sighed.

"Don't give up. Be honest with Peter, about everything. He rewards hard work, and I'm not just talking about physical hard work," Ezra said.

"Then why aren't you working off campus?" Chris asked.

"Not ready to be that honest with myself or Peter I guess," Ezra admitted.

Daisy, Shelby and Juliette nodded in agreement. "I guess it depends on how badly you want to run in that race," Daisy said.

Chris wanted it badly. Competing, especially running, was the only thing that made her happy. It was the one thing that she owned, that she knew she was good at and no one could take that away from her. It came down to personal choice. Would she let the past ruin her chance at a normal future? Could she be honest with herself and Peter, to show him she was trying? Maybe at her next one on one session, she'd talk to him about the marathon.

The next day Scott was anxiously awaiting to be picked up. All the Cliff Hangers waited with him and wished him luck when he got into Bob's car. They dispersed to do their chore and Chris went to her one on one session with Peter.

"Peter, I know I have a lot of work to do before I gain your trust. But I wanted to know if anyone from Horizon is going to run in that July marathon and if I could go too?"

"Have you ever run a 5K marathon?" Peter asked.

"Yes, but not a street race. It was cross country. I dislocated my shoulder when a competitor pushed me off the course." Then she added, "I've done one triathlon too, but came last. It was a Sprint Distance one. So 750 metre swim, 20 km bike ride and 5 km run. I came close to last. I did well with the bike ride and run, it's the swimming that got me. I can't crawl, I breast stroke."

"That's still a great accomplishment, testing your endurance like that. You're parents must have been proud," Peter said.

She knew he wanted to talk about them and how she felt. Chris was terrified of telling him about them, but she wanted to compete so badly, that she faced that fear. With a voice quaking with pain, she replied quietly, "not the cross country race because I didn't place. They were disappointed that I didn't place better in the triathlon, but then so was I."

"Normally how was your relationship with them?" He probed.

"Childhood was usually great. I was a mischievous kid, so I got disciplined a lot. But I know sometimes I deserved it," she replied.

Peter could see Chris was scared about what he would ask next. He could see her mental fight with herself all over her face. "How were you disciplined?"

"Spanked and…. beaten." She looked down, trying not to cry. She was so sick of crying.

"You know that what you tell me, that I have to report child abuse to the authorities."

"I know. I'm trying to be open. I know I need help, I know I have to earn your trust, I want to compete so bad."

He nodded and then asked for her to describe the situation and beatings. She let years of pent up emotional pain come out. Once she started, the flood began and she didn't stop. All her issues with her parents came out. Even when her session time was over, Peter didn't stop her. He called the office and told them to inform her classes that she was with him and to excuse her.

"I tripped down the stairs because my socks were not pulled up right. I fell down to the bottom and made so much noise. I woke my dad up. He had a migraine so he was napping. When I got to the top of the stairs he hit me and sent me tumbling back down again, yelling that I shouldn't have woken him up because I didn't obey him about my socks." Chris explained. "The worst was the day I put a soft cover book in my pants and he found it when he went to spank me. It enraged him, hitting me with his leather belt wasn't enough. He made me go get my skipping rope. He was going to whip me, my mom stood in his way and told him he was taking the punishment to far. He backed down. But she was no angel either. I know I was bad, but never that bad."

Peter asked, "were you still being beaten before they kicked you out?"

"No. When I was fifteen, I got in his face about beating me. He picked me up and threw me against the wall, but I threatened to kill him if he ever touched me again. He stopped. I think he respected me standing up to him." Then she added, "they never encouraged me or said anything positive when I accomplished something. They always bashed my character and said I wasn't trying hard enough. I'm stubborn and if I am told I can't do something, I prove people wrong. But my sister, she was the golden child, always did what she was told. When she got in trouble she would turn on the tears and get away with it. I couldn't cry on command like that, so I let my hate protect me."

"You told me once that you didn't care what your family thought. To me it sounds like you cared a lot and still do," Peter pointed out.

"I did…. I do. But after what I just told you, they are out of my life for good. I was brought up to never tell anyone anything. As soon as you report it, even if I lie and say it's all not true, if I wasn't dead to them before, I will be now." She paused and looked him in the eye. "I told you about this stuff not to hurt them, but so you can tell me the truth."

"And what truth is that?"

She looked away, unable to face him. "Did I deserve it? Was I really that bad?"

Peter came forward and crouched down in front of her. He took her hand and waited until she met his eyes. "No you didn't and no you were not. No one deserves to be treated like that. Chris you were a good kid, you still are. Look how much courage you had to tell me these things."

" I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of my emotional hell. I want to be happy. It's not courage Peter, it's fear of always staying damaged."

"The past has no power over you, unless you let it. Telling me all of this today, is a big step in overcoming it's hold on you."


	17. Chapter 17

_** There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.**__- Beverly Sills_

CHAPTER #17

Everyone was enthralled with Scott's tales about his football practices. The team had not so readily accepted him, until he had taken a big hit and shook hands with the guy who had delivered it. He worked hard to impress his new team and they in turn welcomed him. They could all see that playing football again, was a huge positive change. He was always smiling now. When Chris told Shelby and Scott about ratting out her parents to Peter, they both were supportive.

While they were talking, Shelby's sister came to say hello. She introduced her to Chris. "Jess this is Chris, a newer Cliff Hanger."

"Hi," they said to each other.

Jess looked at Chris and said, "I heard that you told Peter about your parents beating you. That took a lot of guts."

"Thanks I think. How did you find out?"

"One of the seniors in my group over heard Peter on the phone, when he was reporting it."

"Great, I guess it's all over campus by now. So I'm a rat."

Jess grabbed her arm and said, "don't ever think that. We don't. I should've spoken up sooner about Walt. You just proved to everyone how strong you really are."

Chris hugged the younger girl. "We're you around when I went into the water and Scott pulled me out? I'm a nut job, I'm not strong."

Shelby laughed, "we're all nut jobs. So when we tell you that you did good, you know it's something."

"Thanks everyone," Chris finally accepted the compliment.

Scott held Shelby's hand and squeezed it. "There's hope for all of us."

"Say's the football hero. I can't wait to see you play," Auggie said coming over to join them.

"Ya for once we don't have to take the punishment of trying to tackle you," Ezra added.

"Seeing you in your gear is going to make me all hot and bothered," Shelby said with sexual heat.

"You're always horny Shelby," Daisy teased.

"Guys in football gear are so hot," Juliette said.

"Well this guy is all mine, so don't you girls forget it." Shelby said a little territorially.

"It will be so fun to go to a game and watch you stomp them," Chris said. "If we stay out of trouble, maybe Peter and Sophie will let us go to every home game Scott plays in."

"That would be awesome," Auggie said.

In the mean time, they all had class to go to and shortly parted. Auggie and Chris went to art class. Today's project was all about sharing your inner self. They were allowed to use whatever medium they wanted. Chris used mixed media, she painted and then glued and moulded. From her station, it looked like a tornado had gone through it. Auggie used his paints at first, but when he saw Chris gluing stuff to her painting, he explored using other media too. They were given the whole class to work on it, but only that time. The teacher was impressed with Auggie's work and disturbed by what Chris had done.

"This is all open to interpretation, if you're willing to do so, turn your work around for everyone to see. Then we'll take turns saying what the work tells you," Roger said. To his surprise Chris turned hers around. When she did that, slowly, one by one everyone turned their work around. "Okay who wants to start?"

Auggie said, "I want to tell you what Chris's work says to me."

Chris shrugged and Roger nodded for him to continue.

"It tells me she is like an open bleeding wound. That looks like a scab and it could break open at any minute. She's raw, like an exposed nerve. But at the same time she'd solid, like a brick wall," Auggie pointed at parts of the art, to demonstrate what spoke to him.

The others all said something similar. Jenna said, "that black burnt looking part is like the darkness eating at her soul. But that part, reminds me of a cocoon. Like she's going to morph into a butterfly and escape all the darkness."

Roger asked Chris what she thought about the classes comments. Chris answered, "they all got it right. But I liked how Jenna saw me as a butterfly in transition."

Next was Auggie, then Jenna and the rest of the Class. Chris nudged Auggie after class, "what made you decide to glue on the paper to your painting?"

"You working on your piece. I liked how it brought a third dimension to it. Like you were jumping out at us," Auggie explained. "I wanted the same effect."

"I liked it. Different, but it shows your growth. You've very talented," she complimented.

"So are you. See you at diner, I have to go to my one on one session." Auggie wiggled his eyebrows in mock horror.

"It's laundry time for me," groaned Chris. In the laundry facility she ran into Daisy and Ezra. "Hi Daisy. What's up Ez?"

"Back when this girl named Katherine was part of the Cliff Hangers, I started searching for my biological parents. See she was adopted too, but her step-parents were a lot better than mine. I accidentally found out I was adopted."

"Wow that's crazy. Sometimes I wish I'd been adopted. So how goes the search?"

"Not so good, but now that Kat's in college, she has access to their computer system. So she's been writing me letters with updates on the search. Right now though she's really busy at school and said my search is on hold."

"When you find them, what do you want from them?" Chris asked.

"I want to know why they gave me up," Ezra explained.

"Maybe they were too young and took the easy way out. No pun intended," Daisy offered.

He nodded. "I'm not expecting a miracle, that they love me instantly. I just need to know what they're like. That I have a chance of being normal or whether my drug addiction is because of them."

"You're more normal than most of us," Chris said and then added, "but I'm a totally crazy person, so what do I know." They laughed together and folded their laundry.

While they were doing that, Scott came to ask Chris to run with him.

"I thought you were being picked up by that Bob guy soon," Chris replied.

"Tonight's practice was cancelled, a few of the guys are sick. So do you have time to run?" Scott asked.

Chris smiled, "I'll make the time to run. I just have to take this load to my dorm and put it away. How about in ten minutes meet me at that small gazebo where Peter and Sophie got married."

Inside her dorm Chris put away her cloths quickly. She saw Shelby and invited the blond to join her.

"Hell no. Why would I do exersize I don't have to do?"

Chris rolled her eyes, "ok never mind."

She changed her shoes to her runners and put on shorts. Over her t-shirt she put on a zip up hod die. When she came outside, Scott was already there waiting.

"Let me guess, stretches first?" He asked.

"Always. I'll be right back, I need to ask Peter something." She jogged off and returned carrying some sort of vest. "This is a weight vest. You get to wear it."

He put it on, "it's not heavy at all."

"You'll feel it later, trust me. But it builds endurance. We start out light and add weight as you get use to it. I think Peter put in the same amount of weight you would carry with your football gear on."

They stretched, with Chris showing him some stretches that runners normally did. Then they ran off down the path. Every section of the path that was flat, they'd break into a sprint and then back to their normal fast pace. Scott began to sweet a lot, as the vest began to become noticeable.

"Can we take a short cut back?" Scott asked.

"No. The distance might be shorter, but you'll short change yourself," Chris replied.

Scott groaned, "now you sound like Peter."

"I hate to say it, but sometimes he's right."

"How are your sessions with him?" Scott asked, trying to get his mind off his tired body.

"Okay I guess…. Have you ever had weird dreams, that like turn you on but scare you at the same time?"

"Maybe, like what?" He asked, not sure if she was trying to ask him something about himself or trying to tell him about herself.

"Like perverted stuff. Something that normally you'd never do and never even fantasize of doing, but in the dream it manifests."

"No can't say I have. I guess you have?"

"Lately ya and I wake up feeling disgusting and dirty. Like I can't believe my mind came up with this sick stuff."

"Maybe they aren't just dreams, but twisted memories," Scott suggested.

Chris stopped dead, the look of horror in her eyes. Scott had to jog back to where she was. She looked at him, "I never even thought of that. God no, it's got to be just a dream."

"Forget I said anything. Come on let's finish this torture run."

She nodded and they continued on, ending the run with a sprint. They both stretched. "You should hose down the weight vest, you're dripping wet. And before you hug Shelby, take a shower, you stink," Chris wrinkled her nose.

"You don't smell very good either," Scott said sneezing.

"Hey I'm not that bad," Chris laughed.

As she turned to go, Scott said, "Chris I think you should talk to Peter about your disturbing dream. Like you said on the trail, no short cuts."

She frowned at him, "that was lame. Maybe I will."


	18. Chapter 18

_** Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.**__- James Neil Hollingworth_

CHAPTER #18

Shelby and Jess were having sessions together and then after that individual sessions. Jess went with Sophie and Shelby with Peter. Both of them had gained courage from each other to talk about what had happened with Walt and their hate for a mother that let it happen. Jess was healing quickly, but Shelby was still blocked by the abuse she went through as a street kid. He noticed that in group sessions, when Chris or Scott talked about how they felt about something, Shelby would speak up. So when Chris interrupted Shelby's one on one session, asking to talk to him right after, he had her stay.

"What did you want to talk about Chris?" Peter asked.

"Sometimes I feel like I'm drowning in quicksand."

Shelby nodded, "and the more you struggle, the more you sink and you can't pull yourself out."

Peter suggested, "when you feel like that stop and assess your situation. Use your brain. Just with real quick sand if you don't use your muscles, you'll get out."

"But sometimes, you still need help," Shelby added.

"Why do you feel like you're in quicksand?" He asked.

Chris sighed. "My stupid dreams. I was getting better… right Shelby?"

The blond nodded, "no more screams in the middle of the night."

"Now I'm dreaming sick twisted things. Scott said they might not be dreams, but memories of something that happened and I blocked it. But then why does it turn me on?"

''It's how our minds cope with what happened to us. It's our brain saying what happened was okay, if we liked it." Shelby replied.

"But I don't want it to have happened, I can't handle that," Chris said with despair.

Shelby was doing Peter's job, without realizing it. "What's the dream about?"

"I'm scared to tell you about the new dream, you'll think I belong in the crazy bin. But, there's a dream about me giving blow jobs to men, friends of the manager that raped me. In the dream, I'm doing it because he took me to a fancy expensive restaurant for lunch. So I owed him he says."

Shelby nodded, "I did things like that too, living on the street. One guy became like my regular. At first he just gave me cash. Then he bought me nice cloths to wear when I did him. Or he'd take me out for food afterward. But I think he felt guilty about what he was doing."

"Girls, those men that did that to you, were in the wrong and they knew it. Shelby you're right, they felt guilty for what they did." Peter explained, trying to make them see it wasn't them. "That's not your burden to carry, it's theirs."

As the session continued, Shelby shared more of the things she had done on the street. Chris would describe something, then she would. They were trading their horror stories. Peter's idea to put them together in the same session was working. They were drawing strength to confess, from each other. He was shocked at how much they revealed. He wondered if at times, they forgot that he was there. Chris finally told them about her disturbing dream. The details made him wonder if Scott was right, that they were memories and not just her mind coping with things. When the session came to an end, both girls were crying. The girls hugged each other and accepted the tissues that Peter held out to them.

"Why did you share this with me today?" Chris asked Shelby.

She shrugged, "maybe I just decided to stop holding on to my pain. Or maybe it's cause my fear wasn't as important as making you see that you're not alone."

Peter smiled, Shelby showed growth. "And I'm always here for you both. You don't drown by falling in, you drown by staying there. Today you two didn't stay there, you moved a few steps towards getting out."

The girls wiped their faces and then opened the door to leave. Chris smiled and looked back. "Sometimes Peter you can be so cheesy."

Daisy was at the door, adding sarcastically, "it's like he gets his lines from a Hallmark Card or one of those books about quotes."

Shelby grinned and hugged Daisy, then went to catch up to Chris who was giggling around the corner. Once they were alone Chris asked, "do you think I'm a pervert?"

"No. Do you think I'm a dirty whore?"

"Of course not. You did what you needed to," Chris said.

"Exactly. So why don't you see that for yourself?" Shelby asked.

"Because my life wasn't on the line. It's not the same."

"I think it is."


	19. Chapter 19

_** Life is a series of collisions with the future; it is not the sum of what we have been, but what we yearn to be.**__- Jose Ortega y Gasset_

CHAPTER #19

It was the night of Scott's first game with the Lawrence Hasting's football team. He was both excited and nervous. Shelby was waiting with him for Bob to pick him up.

"You can do this Scott," She kissed him and then leaned her forehead on his. "Training like a mad man this whole week. You caught every ball that Mark threw you. Roger couldn't even take you down. I believe in you."

"Thank's Shelby. Cheer for me?" He asked.

"Duh," she grinned.

Auggie came up and said, "hey Meat, see you at your game."

Juliette was carrying a sign she made, it had too much sparkle on it. "Since I can't be a cheerleader, I made signs for everyone!"

"Twig, I'm not holding a sign like that. Give me a small flag with the team colours," Auggie said.

Chris grinned, "I'll hold that sign with you. Last football game I went to, they tossed me for mooning the other team."

Daisy rolled her eyes, "wow I'm not surprised. Good luck Scott."

Bob honked his horn, "let's go. The coach is waiting with your team."

"I love the sound of that; your team." Ezra commented.

Scott jogged off, after giving Shelby a hug and he got in the car. As they left, Peter pulled up in the school van. He got out and ticked off their names. The other people going with them, were the guys that helped Scott train, including Mark.

"Okay rules are: everyone stays together. No fighting or sexual contact with the other schools. No going off on your own. Either myself or Sophie is to accompany you. That's it, let's show Scott our support and have fun." Peter got in and they drove down the lane way.

"Is it weird that this feels so normal?" Shelby asked.

"Not weird at all. And you guys have earned this trip off campus," Sophie said.

When they arrived at Lawrence Hasting, they found a good spot on the bleachers to watch the game together. Scott was on the field doing stretches with his team. Their opponents jogged onto the field also and did the same. The cheer leaders for each side, worked through a couple of cheers.

Juliette sighed, "I miss doing that."

"Let me guess you were captain of the cheer squad?" Daisy asked.

"No, but I was part of the squad."

"Did you wear the same outfit Twig?" Auggie teased.

"Our colours were maroon and white," Juliette replied.

Auggie leaned over and whispered in her ear, "I would have loved seeing you cheer." He was pleased to see her blush. He'd been worried that seeing Scott in his football gear, would have made her fall for him again. Instead, she was still his girl.

The two teams went onto the field and the game began. The visiting team had the ball first and scored a touch down, but the field goal kick went wide. Then it was Lawrence Hasting's turn. Scott caught every ball thrown to him and the team was loving it. One of the other receivers took a big hit and fumbled the ball, but Scott managed to recover it, even though he was tackled. After the first quarter the two teams were tied. Everyone from Mount Horizon that was at the game, were cheering so loud, that they'd probably have no voices the next day. By the time it was half time, Lawrence Hasting was 4 points ahead on the score board.

Peter was proud of his kids, they were behaving and being so supportive of Scott and the football team. They chatted with people in the stands from Lawrence Hasting, but mostly kept to themselves. He guess they were trying to show him that supporting Scott was more important than anything else and it was working.

Scott would be bruised the next day from the hits he took, but everyone on his team was glad to have him. The guy he had replaced was thrilled with his performance. The coach too was impressed. After half time, Scott showed how versatile he was, by tackling someone from the opposing team. In the end the other team won, but only by one point. For a first game with the team, no one had complaints and they were all sorry to see Scott have to go again.

The quarterback and captain of the team shook Scott's hand. "You played like a real pro out there. I'm just glad you're on our team. Next time we'll win."

"Thank's," Scott said before getting into the van.

On the drive back Peter added, "I'm please with how all of you handled yourselves tonight. So if everyone keeps up their grades, every home game that Scott has, you can all go."

The whole van erupted with cheers. Sophie and Peter smiled at each other. Tonight had been it's own victory and not one that was won on the field.


	20. Chapter 20

_** One is not born into the world to do everything, but to do something.**__- Henry David Thoreau_

CHAPTER #20

The happiness that surrounded Scott, rubbed off on the other Cliff Hangers. Juliette helped Susan with a history project, which involved re-dressing her childhood doll in historic garments. They got 95% on their presentation. Scott and Mark, helped one of the guys that trained with Scott to finally complete the rope course. Bryan had never had the courage to face his fear of heights, until those two encouraged him to do it. The good will seemed to pay forward.

During art class they were told to show a moment of happiness and sadness from their childhood. Chris painted on one side fishing with her father, where the fish seemed to jump out at them in 3D. The sadness was a stick figure of her father, his face was scratches of black and red. His foot was gigantic and it was about to squash a black sheep, that stood beside a white one. She felt her picture said it all and refused to talk about it. Mary who rarely spoke, due to her stutter, explained the picture.

"Chris is t-the bl-bl-black sh-sheep. Her d-dad is a-angry a-and cr-crushing her un-until sh-sh-she's g-gone."

The teacher was amazed that Mary had spoken. Chris nodded and then hugged Mary, "thank you for being my voice."

Later Chris sat and ate lunch with Mary. The only person that Chris had ever shown her journal to while at Mt. Horizon had been Peter, but she now shared it with Mary.

"Sometimes when I can't talk, I write. Poetry or stories to purge my soul," Chris explained.

"I-I do t-t-too. I c-can s-s-sing t-t-too," Mary said.

"Can you sing this?" Chris pushed one of her poems towards Mary.

The girl nodded and sang softly to Chris. The amazing thing was that when Mary sang, she didn't stutter. She had a nice voice too and Chris said so. Daisy came by then and asked her if she knew how to sing Amazing Grace. To everyone's delight, Daisy and Mary sang together. It was beautiful and everyone clapped afterward, making both girls blush.

"Mary have you ever thought of just singing when you're trying to answer questions in class?" Daisy asked.

"N-n-no. D-do you t-think t-t-teachers w-would l-let m-me?"

Chris grinned and waited patiently for Mary to finish asking her question. "If Daisy and I talk to Peter, they will. If we get them to let you, will you try?"

"I-I gu-guess. Th-thanks."

"Sometimes we need someone to be our voice and other times to make ourselves heard, we have to think outside of the box." Chris hugged Mary and then the three of them went to find Peter.

Peter agreed to talk to Mary's teachers. The next day, Mary participated in class and became more social. It was an unconventional solution, but it worked. Thanks to Chris and Daisy, Mary's silence was broken.

For the next two weeks, more and more students on campus had some kind of positive experience. It was the ripple effect in progress. Before everyone was out to protect themselves, unless it was just within their group. Now the Sun Dogs would help the Trackers. The groups began to mingle at lunch, instead of just staying isolated within their teams.

Chris watched an asian guy doing Tai Chi and asked if he'd teach her how to do it. He was known for fighting and being sensitive to racial slurs. "Jaw-long that's so beautiful. Like a dance, but I'm sweating like crazy!"

Jaw-long nodded, "it's a work out for beginners. For me it's just a warm up."

"A warm up for what?"

"Doing my martial arts," he explained.

Chris watched as he showed her some moves. "Wow that was awesome! Can… can you show me some self-defence stuff?"

"Sure I guess, if Peter says it's okay."

Chris noticed Natalie, one of the girls with an eating disorder, watching them. This girl was the opposite to Juliette. She ate when she was upset and gained weight. She found it hard to participate in the sports due to being overweight. Natalie was new to Mount Horizon School. Chris walked over and took Natalie's hand.

"Come on it's easy. Will you try it with me?" Chris asked.

Jaw-long encouraged them both to do the Tai Chi and with a shy blush, Natalie joined them. Soon a group of people were following along with Jaw-long's instruction. One of the counsellors also joined. Natalie was doing exercise and was liking it. It became so popular, that every afternoon it was nice out, after class was done for the day, they did it. Jaw-long began to get along with the other guys more. Especially when Peter allowed the self-defence moves to be taught, with supervision.

Sophie looked at Peter, "did you know that one person's success could have such a lasting effect?"

"It works both ways. When one of them is unhappy it rubs off on them all. Moods are contagious, we're just lucky that this time it has been a positive reaction."

"I love that they are helping each other. I've only seen this when we make them do tasks together. Now they're uniting on their own," Sophie commented.

Peter nodded, "progress, it's what we're all about."

The unity that Sophie spoke of was put to the test on Friday afternoon. Chris was walking towards the Cliff Hangers, who were studying outside at one of the picnic tables. She had gone to the dorm to get her math binder and text.

"Christine!"

Chris looked towards the caller, instantly recognizing the voice. She stopped dead and stared. Her father was walking towards her, but he was not alone. It's who was with him, that made her drop her books. She trembled with fear and peed herself. Unable to run away, she stood there.

Ezra saw Chris drop her books. "What's wrong with Chris?"

Juliette noticed the dark stain spreading down the girl's pants. "She just peed herself, eww."

The Cliff Hangers all got up and went to Chris, concerned she was ill.

"She's shaking. Chris what's wrong?" Auggie asked.

"What's that noise?" Ezra asked.

Shelby looked at Chris, "it's her teeth chattering. She looks terrified!"

"Who are you?" A man asked.

"Could ask you the same question," Daisy said, instantly feeling hostile.

Shelby recognized the man from a picture in Chris's journal. "Your Mr. Marvins, her father."

Scott stood in front of Chris, arms crossed, feet wide. Shelby did the same. They instinctively felt that this was why Chris was so scared. Daisy stood beside Shelby and Auggie beside Scott. Juliette and Ezra held a hand each from Chris. She had a death grip on their hands. Jess and her friends came to back up Shelby. Jaw-long was beside Auggie and looked ready to fight. Mark saw something going on and joined them, noticing everyone had defensive body language.

"Get out of the way. We're here for her," Mr. Marvins said angrily.

"Over my dead body," Scott said.

"Over our dead bodies," Shelby added.

Other kids began to join them. Susan and Mary came to help out. Then their teams joined them. And so they all united, more and more kids standing ready to help out. They found out quickly that someone from the Cliff Hangers was in danger. Whispers quickly ran through the group explaining that the two men facing the group, wanted to hurt one of them. One of the seniors ran to find Sophie and another went for Peter. As Sophie came out of the main lodge, Mary grabbed her arm.

"Protect Chris from them," Mary said without stuttering once.

Now Sophie was super alarmed. Peter saw the huge group of kids in a triangle formation. They all stood with legs apart and arms crossed. At the head of the group he found Scott and Shelby in a stand off with two strange men. Behind them he saw Chris, who he realized was the one being protected.

"Mr. Marvins is Chris's dad and he wants to take her away," Shelby said coldly.

Peter didn't like the situation at all. "Mr. Marvins gave up that legal authority when he disowned her. But we can talk in my office. Sophie can you show these two men where to go?"

Sophie nodded. Peter needed to deal with the kids first. Once the men had left, he told one of the seniors who worked in the main lodge, to call their lawyer and have him holding on line one to his office. Then to call the police to come and remove these unwanted guests. Next he stood on a picnic table to address the group.

"Counsellors will take each of your groups to have a session and discuss what has happened here this afternoon. Sun Dogs go to the pavilion. Trackers and Ridge Runners in the lunch room. Wind Dancers can go to the living room. Cliff Hangers stay with me."

The group dispersed slowly, still not sure if everything was okay. When it was just the Cliff Hangers, everyone started talking at once. Peter pieced together the story, once he sorted them out. Shelby and Scott moved out of the way, so he could look at Chris.

"Chris are you still here with us?" Peter asked.

She looked him in the eyes and blinked. He understood, she couldn't talk yet, but she was mentally there.

Juliette said, "Peter she was so scared she wet herself."

They could smell it too. "Girls take her to the showers and get Chris cleaned up and changed. The boys will wait for you here."

The girls tried to lead Chris away, but she couldn't move.

"I'll carry her to the showers. Then I'll leave, okay?" Scott asked Peter.

Peter nodded. When Chris was gone he said to Auggie and Ezra. "Tell Chris that her father will be in my office if she wants to talk to him. But she doesn't have to. I'll hold a group session with the Cliff Hangers once the police have removed them from campus."

While Chris was in the shower, the girls talked to her, waiting for her to respond. She came out in a towel and changed. Then Chris turned to them and said, "thank you. Thank you for protecting me."

"Why were you so scared?" Daisy asked.

"Not my dad. The other man," Chris whispered.

Knocking on the door outside interrupted them, making Chris jump. Scott stuck his head in the door and called out. "Are you guys coming out now?"

Chris nodded and they walked with her to the door. "Thank you Scott, Shelby, all of you for helping me."

Scott smiled sadly at her, "are you okay?"

She shrugged.

Auggie spoke up, "Peter said that he's got them in his office, if you want to talk to your dad."

Ezra added, "but you don't have to."

She shrugged again and began to walk in that direction, they followed her quietly. As they crossed the courtyard she made up her mind. She was going to strip her father's self righteousness away. Outside of Peter's office, Chris turned to her friends and said, "I'm going to be raw and real."

She opened the door wide and yelled at her father, "that man with you covered up the fact that my co-worker sexually assaulted me. But that's not all, he raped me and forced me to do sexual things for his friends. That's why I started doing drugs and drinking. I didn't tell you to protect you from going to jail for murder. Do you feel better knowing dad? Do you feel like a man for hurting me over and over. I hate you both and I hope you both rot in hell!"

Chris ran away, past the Cliff Hangers, who were all shocked with her declaration. Peter went after her, not caring if the father beat up the man beside him. All he was worried about was Chris. He caught up with her, just as the police arrived.

"They're inside," Chris said to the police.

Sophie was with the police and she lead them to Peter's office.

The Cliff Hangers watched Chris fall to her knees, then Peter crouched down and held her. They all came forward and made it a group hug. She wasn't crying, like they all thought she'd be.

"I'm okay, really." Chris said and everyone let go, giving her space. She stood up and looked at Peter. "What's going to happen now?"

Shelby answered, "Peter makes an official report. Then a child welfare worker investigates. They ask you questions, really specific, personal questions all on video."

Peter held up his hand to stop her. "What do you want to happen?"

"I don't know. No one will believe me."

"We all believe you," Ezra said.

"Then I want them to pay for what they did."

"When you say _they_, who do you mean?" Auggie asked.

Chris looked at Peter, "both my dad and the other two. I'm not as strong as Shelby, I might not make it through to the end, but I'll try."

"I have to talk to the police. Then when you see them leave, come to my office and we'll have a group session," Peter said before heading back into the main lodge.

Daisy pointed out, "Chris at least you're doing something."

Scott added, "you're stronger than you think. And if you didn't notice, everyone here and I'm not just talking the Cliff Hangers, are here for you."

"How do I thank everyone for protecting me?" Chris asked.

"Every day that you reach out and help someone, does it. But you don't have to thank anyone, because we all know you would've done the same for us." Ezra said sincerely.


	21. Chapter 21

_** Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.**__- Unknown_

CHAPTER #21

During the investigation into what had happened to Chris, she broke down mentally four or five times. It made the process long, but she didn't give up, because Peter and the Cliff Hangers wouldn't let her. Digging up all of her past, made her relive every moment, every pain. When the nightmares came back, the girls in her dorm pushed their beds together and put their differences aside. All that mattered was getting Chris through it. First she had to explain the abuse inflicted on her from her parents; both physical and mental. Then came the sessions about the sexual assaults and rape. Chris didn't think she had any more tears or emotions left, by the time it was done. Her friends and Peter, were the reasons she didn't let the quicksand swallow her up.

"How do I handle life now?" Chris asked Peter in her one on one session.

"One day at a time, just like you have been since you got here."

"It was a lot easier when only I was carrying all this, when no one knew."

Peter had heard that before. "Really? Why do you think it was easier?"

She tried to answer that, to explain how it had been better, but she couldn't. Chris had to admit that an invisible weight had lifted off her soul, when she had confronted her dad, when she told all. She had stopped letting them win.

"Those secrets, the pain, it no longer controls you. Suffering now is optional. When you made that mental choice to change your life, it's hold on you ended. I think you know that."

Chris stopped pacing and turned to look at him. Her mind was processing what Peter had just said. "I know that?" It was a rhetorical question.

Peter stood up and walked until he stood in front of her, waiting for her to comprehend everything.

"I'm going to be okay… not normal, but okay." Chris began to crumple to the ground and Peter caught her in his arms. She clung to him, "thank you for saving me."

"You did all the hard work, just like now, all I did was catch you when you were falling. We show you how to handle life, that's what Mount Horizon is all about."

A big sigh escaped her and she let go of him and stood up. They talked a little longer and then the session was over. Letting go of all that painful baggage, made Chris realize that there was now room for other secrets. For the first time in years, she noticed that she was sexually attracted to some of the Cliff Hangers. It amazed her and scared her. She watched them walk by and felt her heart racing, as desire ran through her veins. Embarrassed she needed an outlet. Through all this drama, she was still training for the marathon.

"Mark do you want to come for a run?"

"Not really, but for you I will."

They stretched after he changed into track pants, then off they ran. It was a brisk pace and he wondered if she was still running from something or to somewhere. He didn't push her to talk, knowing by now that if she needed him, she'd say what was on her mind.

"I'm glad I have this marathon to focus on, so that all the stupid shit in my head shuts up," Chris said suddenly.

"What stupid shit? You mean about your dad and those men, or something else?" Mark asked patiently.

The ran a little while longer, before Chris answered. "Sure that's there, but for the first time in ages, I feel sexual attraction. The problem is who it's towards."

"Who is it?" Mark probed.

Chris sighed, "Shelby and Scott and Peter."

"All three?"

"Yes. Shelby and Scott together, Peter by himself… it doesn't matter, it's all wrong. I'm just a sick freak."

Mark stopped running and so did Chris. He walked toward her and said, "you're not a freak. Those three helped you through some of the roughest mental ordeal ever. Of course you are bonded to them. And it doesn't hurt that Scott and Peter are hot. I mean Scott has sexy abs, is tall and cute. Peter, just watch him punching the bag in the equipment shed. He's one fit man. His arms…." Mark gushed.

Chris smiled and teased, "god you're gay. But exactly. When Peter holds me in his arms I feel safe and desire. I don't want to kiss him or anything, but I like feeling his body against mine…. I don't like older men, but him…."

"I think that's normal Chris. Peter is safe to lust after, because he'll never return that. Same with Shelby and Scott. Be happy that you can even feel any sexual attraction, especially after everything you've been through."

She thought about what he said, how these three had helped her and were safe to fantasize about. Mark was right, she picked the only people other than Mark himself, that she knew would never return her desires. "Thanks Mark, are you just glad that I'm not lusting after you?"

"Honey, I'd be honoured if you lusted after me." He gave her a hug and then they returned to running.

"I'm glad I can talk to you about this, I sure as hell can't tell Peter."

Mark disagreed, "I think you can and I think you should. Be honest or your mind may make this progress turn into something twisted and ugly."

When Chris looked at Mark, her eyes were round in surprise. "What? You think I should tell Peter I'm lusting for him?"

"Not exactly like that, but tell him that your sexual desire has come back and it scares you about who it's put on. Tell him that you think it's because it's safe to like these people, because nothing would ever happen. You don't have to tell him names if you don't want to."

"True… maybe at my next one on one session…. And Mark, thanks for being my shrink today."

Mark laughed, "you've done it for me too. Now let's head back, I'm sick of running."

They jogged back in silence, each with their own thoughts. Chris was sick of running too, but not in the physical sense. She would face her feelings, break them down and figure them out. Mt. Horizon wasn't just a school anymore, this was home.


	22. Chapter 22

_**All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous unpremeditated act without benefit of experience.**__- Henry Miller_

CHAPTER # 22

Scott and Shelby knew that having a relationship in a place like Horizon, other people were always around. Their friends helped them find alone time often enough, by providing interference so the counsellors didn't know they were missing. They leaned on each other often, but both were healing since their inner demons had been released. Scott was becoming more of a team leader, excelling at sports and even had his grades up. His optimism spread over the Cliff Hangers, but mostly he brought out a softer side of Shelby. For her, being there for her little sister, somehow helped her too. When she and Scott had protected Chris from her father, it made her want to help others more. Shelby began to wonder if maybe that's what she would do as a profession.

Like most high schools they had a career day, where various professionals from the community would talk and share information about their jobs. Most of the seminars were done via video conference calls or computer face time. The few locals that were allowed to come to Horizon to speak, everyone knew already. It was a bit of a reunion for the Cliff Hangers, because Katherine returned to encourage them to reach for the sky. Hank the forest ranger came to talk to the kids interested in working outdoors. He gave them information about getting into the ministry of natural resources, needing a bachelor's degree in forestry and other related fields. Annie talked about owning a restaurant and being in the food industry. All the kids liked her seminar, because she brought food samples for everyone. Sheriff Curtis also briefly spoke about law enforcement and keeping the peace.

"You should become a cop or lawyer Shelby," Auggie suggested after the Sheriff's speech.

Scott thought about that, "he's right. You're fierce when you want to protect someone."

Shelby smiled, "putting away bad guys…. sure I could do that."

Juliette smirked, "she'd just like playing with the handcuffs."

"I wouldn't mind that," Scott said.

"Maybe she shouldn't be given a gun," Ezra added.

"Scared I'd shoot you Freakin?" Shelby teased.

He nodded, "me and anyone else you got mad at."

They saw Peter coming and broke up their little chat. When they dispersed on their own, to continue participating in career day, Peter grinned. They were getting to know him pretty well. Even though no one from the Cliff Hangers would be graduating that year, the progress they were making meant that one or two of them might graduate the next year. This made him both very happy and a little sad. These kids, more so than the rest, were very close to his heart. But just like your own children, eventually you have to let go and let them spread their wings. Leaving the safety of Horizon to deal with the world, was like a leap in the dark. Trusting that the foundations he'd created, would help them make the right choices. That was why they had career days, to give the kids something to work towards and hold on to outside of Mt. Horizon.

During lunch the group chatted about if they'd go to college or university once they left Horizon. When Sophie walked by, she noticed that Chris wasn't joining in on the discussion. Trying not to be too obvious, she eavesdropped.

"I'm going to whatever school gives me the best football scholarship. But if I get injured or something, I don't know what to have as a back up."

"Come on Scott, we all know you would be a coach, maybe even for some high school team," Auggie said.

Scott shrugged, "maybe."

Juliette added, "you're a born leader Scott. Whenever we're on hikes you take charge, especially if we're having trouble." Then she did some self reflection, "I like the idea of being a planner for events or weddings. I've been to enough of them anyway."

Ezra grinned, "with that kind of logic maybe I'll be a pharmacist, but the legal kind."

Daisy shook her head, "no way Ezra, you'd go out of business from using your own product. You're smart though and good at chemistry. Maybe you'll be a doctor or something like that."

"Doctors make good money, but have to go to school way too long." Ezra shrugged. He was younger than the others, so he wouldn't be graduating next year anyway.

"Still want to be a mortician Daisy?" Shelby asked her friend.

"Maybe. You've got to admit I'm great with make-up."

Chris finally spoke, "she'd be a great movie make-up artist, specializing in Horror movies."

Daisy looked at Chris. "Hey I like that idea. I wonder what I'd have to do to get into that."

It seemed that only Sophie noticed that Chris didn't say what she wanted to be. She did however answer Daisy, "there's a lot of options, like going to school for cosmetology. Some people also take art classes to learn colour theory, painting and blending. I have a friend who started out just doing make-up for weddings, photography, makeovers and such, before she landed a contract for TV."

Daisy got thoughtful, "I never even thought of all that."

Juliette grinned, "we could work together. As a wedding planner I could hire you on behalf of the brides."

Scott laughed, "and the brides would look like they were marrying death."

"Be nice," Daisy pretended to pout.

Sophie left the group alone and went to join Peter. He looked happy. "Not too long ago, these kids didn't even consider having a future or even wanting one. Now look at them, they're making plans, setting goals. I'm so proud of them."

Sophie hugged him and kissed his cheek, "I'm proud of you. None of us could have done it without you. We grew together."

Peter looked at Chris and Ezra, "some of them still have a long way to go."


	23. Chapter 23

_**Life doesn't require that we be the best, only that we try our best.**__- Unknown author_

CHAPTER #23

It was finally the day of the marathon. Scott and Mark would run the first bit with Chris, to help her set her pace and offer encouragement. They would do the same towards the end of the race, when she passed the last check point. Both knew it was the last kilometre that would be the hardest. The rest of the Cliff Hangers would be there too, on the sidelines, shouting encouragement and holding her refreshments. Peter's knee was acting up, so he couldn't do any of the running with her, but he'd follow her progress on the sidelines. Chris was nervous and excited. She barfed once and then felt ready to go. Mark and Scott did stretches with her, while Peter got her number and made sure she was registered. He pinned it on her and then got out of the way. The race was about to start.

From where she stood with Mark and Scott, they could see Shelby, Daisy and Ezra holding a sign with her name on it. Juliette shouted and jumped up and down, waiving pom poms.

"You've got a personal cheering squad all in one girl," Mark joked.

They watched the starter raise the gun and then the pack of runners moved out. The three of them remained in the middle, letting the sprinters take the lead. Chris started off a little fast, caught up in the moment, but Scott made her focus and slow down. She was at a comfortable pace, letting her legs warm up.

"I can't believe how many people came out for his run," Mark said.

"At the half way point, I bet there will be half as many around you Chris." Scott added, as they passed two more people.

"That's the plan. After the first check point I'll speed up, just like we trained. Thanks again for running with me," Chris said.

Mark smirked, "you owe me a back rub tomorrow."

"And this is my way of thanking you for helping me train for football," Scott replied.

They ran side by side, rarely talking. It wasn't long before they reached the first check point. The boys ran off the course, while Chris continued on. She accepted a small paper cup of water from Daisy and drank it slowly. Holding it in her mouth first, then slowly swallowing. She didn't want to get a cramp and needed her body to absorb all the moisture it could. Passing a garbage can, she threw the cup into it. The Cliff Hangers, Mark and Peter all cheered her on.

Once by herself she thought about a lot of things, as she ran onward. Running helped clear her mind and this time was no exception. She revisited everything since coming to Mount Horizon. One thing that she kept going back to was her sister. She wanted to sit down with her and give her a piece of her mind. Even after Veronica found out about the assaults, she still didn't give Chris support. What Chris really wanted was an apology from her older sister, to admit she was wrong to turn her back. That was something she'd have to talk to Peter about at a later time. And that brought her to thinking about Peter, how his patience and understanding helped her gain control of her life again. Like Jess, Shelby's little sister always said, Peter saved her life too. Thinking about him, made Chris blush, but anyone watching wouldn't know it, as all the runners had flushed faces.

"Go Chris go!" Shelby yelled from the sidelines, as her fellow Cliff Hanger ran past.

The interruption to her thoughts, made Chris refocus on the marathon. She checked the sign that Mark held and listened to Peter that she could now pick up her pace a little more. As she adjusted her speed, she smiled and waived at her cheer group.

Ezra cupped his hands, shouting above the other's. "You can do it! We know you can!"

Chris ran on, leaving them behind. Her thoughts went to Scott and Shelby, they were her best friends other than Ezra. As a couple they had the usual issues, but their love for each other was real and true. It was the sexual energy that surrounded them that sometimes drew Chris to them. It thrilled her and terrified her all at once. She wondered if either of them knew about her crush on them. Mark would never tell them and he was the only one who knew, as she still hadn't told Peter who it was that stirred up those feelings.

The marathon was going up hill and Chris easily passed another group of runners. She was gaining on the front runners. For a while she ran beside a guy she recognized from Lawrence Hasting's High School. They chatted briefly, as he knew her too. He'd been at the last football game, where Scott had caught an impossible throw. The guy couldn't keep up with her pace, especially up the hill and dropped back. He wished her good luck. At the top of the hill, as it bent around the mountain, Chris looked over her shoulder and couldn't see him anymore. She checked her watch and liked that she was making good time. There was a section of the marathon that went off road and through the forest. The path was clear, even if it hadn't been marked. It had to be taken, as it cut out a large portion of road, that would have extended the distance of the marathon by another four kilometres. In the forest, she could hear people ahead of her. Having often trained on the paths of Mount Horizon, running off road was easy for her and she was sure footed. Again she overtook some of her competition and came out of the forest onto the road, with the front runners in sight.

It was the last leg of the race and as promised Mark and Scott joined her. They were fresh and rested, which meant they could really push her to the end.

"Miss us?" Mark asked as he handed her a paper cup of Gatorade.

She drank it and held it in her mouth, just like she'd done with the water, previously. Finally she dumped it in a garbage bag that someone held out to her. "Are those people ahead of us the front runners?"

"Yes. One man and one woman are far ahead of those people, but those five are all fighting for third place."

"When did Peter say I should sprint for the end?" Chris asked.

Scott grinned, "when we leave the road and run on the sidelines with you."

"I'm feeling good, I could sprint now," Chris replied.

Mark shook his head and almost tripped, "too soon. Save it all for the last push to the end."

That said the guys picked up the pace and Chris increased her stride to match them. She wasn't running faster, just a different style than most of the race. The distance shortened between them and the five in front of her.

"Two more bends and then comes the straight away to the end. Let's go Chris!" Scott shouted and sprinted off.

She refused to let him run ahead of her and that stubborn streak, made her run faster. They ran on the outside of those five, making the group run faster. That made the group separate and become more strung out. Then Scott and Mark ran on the sidelines. Chris could see the finish. She would never catch the two up front, as they just about reached the finish. But three people were in front of her. She saw everyone she cared about cheering her on and to her surprise and delight, Mike was at the finish line. Chris dug deep inside her and found the energy and will to run even faster. She was sprinting to the finish like she was on fire. It was between her and an adult man, giving their all to the end. They came in third together, it was a dead heat.

"Congrats!" The guy panted, "that bit at the end was the hardest I've fought for anything."

With her chest heaving and gasping for breath she nodded. "My legs feel like rubber!"

They shook hands and then Mike picked her up high and swung her around. "Chris you are amazing!"

The Cliff Hangers joined him, all shouting congratulations. Peter took the bouquet of flowers Chris was given by the finish line representatives. Scott used one flower from the bunch and tucked it into her hair.

"You did it Chris, doesn't it feel great?"

Her beaming smile said it all. Her spirit was soaring high, even though her body was exhausted and wanted to collapse to the ground. "I couldn't have done it without you guys. Thanks for helping me train. Peter thanks for believing in me and being my coach."

"You tried your hardest, that's all I asked for. Good things come slow, just like distance running." Peter said as he hugged her back.

Ezra said, "I got the end sprint all on video too. Everyone back at Mt. Horizon is going to see your victory."

"I didn't win though," Chris said.

Daisy explained, "you didn't have to."

Juliette asked, "did you hear us? I even rolled up my sign into a mega phone and shouted the loudest."

Chris smiled, "I did Juliette, I heard you screaming my name."

"I'm deaf from her yelling," Auggie complained.

"Christine Shaw please come to the podium to accept your third prize medal. In a spectacular finish, Rick Point and Christine Shaw tied for third place."

Everyone went to the clearing, where Chris accepted her medal. Both were given gift certificates to an online store for sports wear. After the ceremony, they led Chris to where there was further refreshments and energy snacks.

"We can stay for the closing ceremony or go home and have our own celebration party," Peter said.

Chris was beginning to feel the exhaustion. She stretched and shook out her muscles. "Let's go home, I don't want to pass out here."

No one was disappointed, because they all wanted to brag about how awesome she'd done in a marathon that had people in it from all over the country. The Cliff Hangers were proud. Mike had to go and couldn't join them at Mt. Horizon, but just having him at the finish line had meant the world to Chris. They hugged good bye and right in front of Peter, Chris kissed Mike. It was a long passionate kiss, that had Shelby cat calling.

"All right, break it up. Let's get going."

Chris winked at Mike and then climbed into the van. She waived good bye as he got into his car and left. She hadn't meant to do that, but couldn't help it. Mike would just think she really missed him and wouldn't analyze the moment, like she would. In the end on the ride back, Chris fell asleep with a huge smile on her face.


	24. Chapter 24

_**Put your ear down close to your soul and listen hard.**__- Anne Sexton_

CHAPTER #24

After the marathon, things settled down around Mt. Horizon. Chris did notice that things were getting a little more hot and heavy between Juliette and Auggie. They snuck away from the group almost as much as Scott and Shelby would. Ezra even caught them making out in the sports equipment shed. He made a bet with some of the other students, taking odds on when Juliette and Auggie would do the dirty dead. But even though Juliette was comfortable with the touching and kissing, she wasn't ready yet.

"Getting frustrated with always having to stop?" Scott asked as he saw Auggie chopping more wood, without being asked.

"A little. But I can wait, she's worth it."

Scott nodded knowingly. "That's how I felt with Shelby. You just tell us when we need to get you some alone time and we'll all make it happen."

Auggie replied, "thanks man…. What's with Chris and you guys?"

"What do you mean?" Scott asked, puzzled.

"Don't you see her watching you and Shelby all the time. This strange expression comes on her face and it's like she can't get away fast enough. I thought maybe you guys had a fight or something."

Scott shrugged, "not that I know of. Girls are just nuts."

"Especially around here," Auggie chuckled.

"I'll ask Shelby if she noticed anything." Scott helped stack the cut wood pieces and then jogged off to find his girlfriend.

Chris meanwhile, was with Ezra, picking out girls who could be potential girlfriends. "How about that girl, she's a cute little package. And she's good in chemistry class. She lets me copy some of her work too."

"What's her name?" Ezra asked.

"Carley, I think."

He looked at the short red haired girl. "What's she here for?"

Shrugging Chris said, "I'm not really sure… suicide I think. But she's a cutter too, some nice scars on her wrists and ankles."

"Jules would have that in common with her. I never really understood the whole cutting thing. I know it's about control, but I still don't get it," Ezra sighed.

"Okay, so maybe not Carley. Hmm… okay how about the skinny blond over there. She's into plants and stuff. She helps with the gardens."

"I've met her before. That's Sharon. She always talks about her boyfriend from back home."

Chris tried one more suggestion. "The brunette, her name is Brandy. She's into heavy metal, piercings and was dumped here by her divorced mother. Apparently Brandy likes anything chemical. After having her stomach pumped four times, she came here."

This girl caught his interest. "How old is she?"

"Same as you. Hey I'll introduce you, then I have my one on one with Peter." Chris wouldn't let Ezra say no, she dragged him over to the girl. "Hey Brandy, this is Ezra. He's the guy we talk to about the best chemical high."

"Oh I don't do that anymore," she said.

"Neither do I, but every newbie always asks me anyway," Ezra clarified.

"I know how you feel. Or the ones who've never tried anything stronger than weed and want to know what to try next."

Chris grinned as Ezra and Brandy chatted about their chemical experiences. She didn't think they even noticed when she left. A short jog brought her to Peter's office. She knocked before entering. Peter was on the phone and hung up shortly after Chris sat down.

"So what do you want to talk about today?" He noticed she didn't look at him. So he waited for her to answer. "Chris?"

She blurted, "I'm having sexual feelings towards some people and it scares me."

"Why does it scare you?" He probed gently.

"Because I shouldn't feel that way about them. And I don't mean just cause it's not allowed, it's just wrong."

"Who is it that you feel this way about?"

She shook her head and went silent. So he tried something else. "Why do you think it's wrong?"

"Because one of them is a girl. I'm not bisexual, but when I see them together; her and her boyfriend, I can't keep my eyes off them. I… I have fantasies about them. But the fantasies are dark and scare me. It's like my brain is twisting it all around. It turns it dirty." Chris stood up and began pacing, she didn't know how to express what it was that made her feel so bad.

"Anyone else you feel sexual towards?"

She nodded and finally looked at him. He saw her shame and her fear, she was about to bolt. "Have you acted on your feelings or talked to any of them about it?"

"No way…. Mark thinks that's why I like these three. They're untouchable, like deep down I know nothing could ever happen, so it's safe to think about them that way."

Peter nodded, so Chris had talked to a friend about it. That was a big step for her. "Is one of the people a counsellor?"

Chris bolted, out the door, through the the building and onto a path heading for the forest. She couldn't do it, talking was overrated anyway. She didn't realize Peter was running after her, until he spoke.

"Running away won't stop the feelings from coming," Peter called to her.

She turned and almost tripped in her surprise. "I'm not talking about that any more, go away."

"You know I won't and I can run as long as you can."

They both knew that depended on his knee. She didn't want to hurt him, so she slowed down. He ran beside her a few minutes, "come on Chris. Talk to me."

Picking the lesser evil, she said, "I'm attracted to Shelby and Scott. They don't know and I'm never telling them." Chris stopped running.

"Are you scared of the feelings or because who the feelings are for?" Peter asked.

"Both I guess. This is the first time in forever, that I even wanted to kiss someone… before, any thing I felt sexually, brought forward the assault and rape."

"Would you like to tell them how you feel? Maybe a session with them?"

"No Peter. Talking about it won't make this go away. I need to like someone else. These three, I only feel this way because they've helped me through some pretty bad shit… I trust them."

He smiled and touched her arm, making her stop. "You're doing my job for me."

"It's like that obsession people get when a fireman or policeman rescues you. Same thing here I bet," Chris added and moved away from his touch.

Peter knew then who the third person was, but he wouldn't say it for her. If he was the one she was talking about, then he had to tread very carefully. If he said the wrong thing, she'd never trust him again, but at the same time, he had to discourage her feelings for him. He got her to turn and begin walking back to the main building. His watch told him they were over the one on one normal time, but Chris was his last session of the day, so it didn't matter. He had to keep her talking.

"What do you think attracts you to Shelby and Scott?"

She frowned at him, "have you seen those two? Sex oozes from their every pore. Not to mention they've been through hell and still are together."

"A lot of the kids that couple up, have been through a lot and still remain together. And yes I know about them, even if they try to hide it. Healthy relationships are understood, just like friendships. And what about the counsellor that you are attracted to, male or female?"

"Male, but I would never cross that line. I don't understand why I'm even feeling anything, because he's older obviously. I don't like guys older than me, it just reminds me of the past shit men have put me through. My age or a year younger, that I can handle."

Now they were getting to the real reason for her affections. "Control is why you feel the way you do. You can control the outcome. That's why you've chosen these three people to be attracted to."

Chris thought about that and finally nodded. "So how do I change this? I mean I like finally feeling something, but I don't want to wreck my friendships and have them turn away from me. I need them in my life."

"Every new thing we experience or go through, can be scary. But you can do it one step at a time. What do you think will happen if you let go of that control?"

"Sophie becomes my counsellor and you turn me away," Chris mumbled.

He waited for her to tell the truth, to let it all out. "Everything has a reaction, but you can't predict what the other person will do. Each situation is different."

"Sometimes I really hate you, but then sometimes I…," Chris stopped. She was scared of telling Peter how she felt. "You make the world make sense," she finished.

"Just think about everything we talked about. About why control is so important to you. Listen to what you are trying to tell yourself, then clarity will come." Peter said to end their session.

"That's a bit cryptic, but I get what you're not saying."

Chris felt like Peter was rocking her boat, but in a way that she wouldn't capsize. That's why he was so successful with the kids he helped. As they walked into the main building, she saw that Ezra was still talking to Brandy. She winked at him, glad he was finally showing interest in someone other than Daisy. But would Daisy encourage him to get to know her or get jealous of this new girl?


	25. Chapter 25

_**In a gentle way, you can shake the world.**__- Mahatma Gandhi_

CHAPTER #25

Scott talked to Shelby about Auggie's observations on Chris. "So what do you think?"

"Maybe… let's test that theory. When we're on kitchen duty, we'll kiss a bit and see if she watches," Shelby planned.

"Alright. But how do you feel about her, if she wants to join in on the kiss? Do you want her to kiss you?"

Shelby shrugged, "I've been with girls, when I was living on the street. This one guy paid me $200 to have sex with him and his wife."

She had just told him about some of the stuff she'd done being a street kid. He was amazed that Shelby had so casually told him, but Scott was glad she had. He realized that Peter's sessions were really helping her heal.

"Well I don't know how I feel about it," he said.

"Trust me, if you have two girls all over you, you'll like it." Shelby winked at him and then left to go to her class.

Scott wasn't so sure that it was as simple as Shelby was making it. But he also wasn't going to invite trouble, so he'd just follow his girlfriend's lead. As he went to drafting class, he saw some girl give Ezra a kiss on the cheek.

"Ezra, who's that hot girl?"

"That's Brandy, her parents are divorced and she went through the same thing I am right now."

"She likes you a lot buddy, you two make a good couple." Scott gave him a high five.

Ezra cocked his head to one side. "Really?"

"Yeah, just ask Auggie when he's not sucking face with Jules." They shared a laugh and sat down for class.

Across the campus Auggie and Chris were in art class. The counsellor was explaining what their next assignment was about. "Emotions are invisible, we can't see them directly, but feel them in our bodies. The same word- feelings- describes both physical sensations and emotions and that's no accident. For example we've all felt nervousness that is like butterflies in your stomach. Or anger that burned you up. Then we can also see what a person is feeling, without any spoken words; sadness in a teardrop, anger in a frown. Often body language can speak louder than words."

"You got that right and girls know how to manipulate boys with that one," Auggie said.

Everyone laughed and the counsellor continued. "The face and voice can lie and hide the real truth. But emotions will come out, whether you like it or not. Eventually the feelings leak out, overflow or burst out in a deluge. When that happens other emotions are displayed and can really confuse things. It's the nature of emotions to move. This is what the assignment is about. Through your art, let the true emotions come out."

People dispersed and began gathering the tools they needed to work in whatever medium they wanted. Chris stood in front of her blank canvas, paints ready, brush in hand. She went over the things he'd just said, but undecided how to begin. Looking around the room she saw some people already working and others in the same boat she was.

"Emotions provide motivation to act for our own survival, but they also enable us to embrace life. They bring honesty, creativity and enthusiasm for life. Feelings give us colour and texture to our experiences, like a palette of colours. But they are never organized like that. Usually they are messy, irrational and pop up when you least expect it. Art is one way to express our true feeling in a healthy way."

Chris agreed, "it purges our souls from toxic waste."

Auggie looked at her, "wow maybe you should try being a poet too, that was deep."

"Focus people. You can be work on your emotions like my example about being nervous or you can be more literal." He sat down at his desk as everyone was working. He turned on some light, almost calming music as they worked.

When class was over, most of them were just beginning the project. They had until the end of the week to complete the assignment. Sometimes the kids had to be shaken gently to help them face their feelings. Art and English class were a great outlet for that expression.

It seemed to Chris that in some way, every class except for math, was pushing her to express her sexual confusion. This was the first time ever, that she as looking forward to math class. Scott teased her about it, after math was over.

"Since when do you volunteer to write out an equation on the chalk board?"

"She sent me up there, I didn't volunteer," Chris retorted.

"You had your hand up," Shelby pointed out.

"Whatever. I still messed it up."

Shelby let it go and nudged Scott, giving him a wink. "We've got kitchen duty for lunch."

The Cliff Hangers grabbed aprons and got to work. Shelby waited until it Chris went to get lettuce from the fridge and then followed with Scott. They blocked the door way, forcing Chris to see they in a deep french kiss.

"Guys… come on, save it until later," Chris said, unable to keep her desire out of her voice.

Never one to let another off the hook, Shelby turned her face from Scott. "Maybe you should join us later. Would you like that?"

Her face went red and Chris shoved past them. Shelby purposely made it so that her body came in contact with their friend, as did Scott. It was like a Chris sandwich. Just for a moment, Chris let it happen. Her heart pounded, her skin was flushed and she looked at Scott's lips. Then the moment broke and she was free of them.

"She liked it. But whether it's you she wants or us, no idea."

"We'll we're a package deal right?" Scott asked, unsure how Shelby would react.

"Of course, she's hot and I could feel that raw desire radiating from her…. Damn I'm horny now."

Scott laughed, "you're always horny… but that's cool with me. I love you Shelby."

She softened at those words, touching his face with her hand. "I love you too Scott, always."

The went back to help their team in the kitchen. Every chance they got, Scott or Shelby would brush up against Chris. When Chris was bent over picking up vegetable debris off the floor, Scott came up beside her. When she stood up, he passed behind her. Chris couldn't help the kick of desire that she felt, when his crotch brushed her ass in passing. It was on purpose, she knew that. But why were they doing this to her?

After lunch was over, there was always a half hour before classes started again. Chris made a bee-line to the art classroom. Within ten minutes, she had paint on her face and hands, but her assignment was well underway. A sound behind her, made her turn around. Relief flooded through her when she saw it was just Daisy.

"Chris, who's that girl with Ezra?"

"Who Brandy?"

Daisy shrugged, "yeah I guess. What's her deal?"

"Jealous?"

"Of Ezra? We're just friends and I'm curious," Daisy said trying to be sarcastic and failing.

"She's gone through what he's dealing with now, in regards to parents and divorce. Other than being a good friend to him, you'd have to ask Ezra if she's something more." Chris began cleaning up her paints. "Would you care if they became girlfriend/boyfriend?"

"Who me? No, Ezra and I aren't like that." Daisy left. If she really looked at it, she'd see that jealousy was festering in her heart.

Chris mumbled, "looks like I'm not the only sexually confused person around."

Shelby and Scott walked in the door, right at that moment. "Daisy's confusion isn't the same as yours and you know it."

"What?" Chris asked in shock.

Taking control of the situation, Shelby walked up to Chris and pulled her face to hers. As they kissed, she pulled Scott to stand with them. After Shelby stopped kissing Chris, she pushed Scott and Chris's heads together. Where Shelby had been demanding in her kiss, Scott's lips were gentle and inviting. Chris got lost in the moment, sharing kisses and touches with both. But she couldn't handle it, when Scott pressed his body into hers.

Chris pushed them away, "I can't… I don't…sorry." She left and went to the washroom. She splashed cold water all over her face and wished she had time for a cold shower. "Wow that was awkward," she said to her mirrored reflection.

What would she do? Be brave and face her feeling or run away afraid. Her inner voice was churning inside her. Would the ripples of desire that her friends has shaken into her, be allowed to cause change? Could she face the truth of those emotions? These thoughts plagued her the rest of the day, but by the time dinner arrived, she had made her choice. Yes she wanted to explore, feel joy and awaken her sexuality. And just maybe, being with two people that she trusted, would change Chris for the better. It was time for change, no longer was the whole world screaming at her. Her feelings wouldn't cripple her. She understood that actions had consequences and that they had the capacity to harm as much as heal. But hiding from doing nothing, wasn't an option any more.


	26. Chapter 26

_**In wisdom gathered over time, I have found that every experience is a form of exploration.**__- Ansel Adams_

CHAPTER #26

Peter hadn't seen Ezra this happy in a long time. The sessions with him had improved as well. Sophie reported that Brandy too seemed to be improving recently also. They knew the two had been seen chatting alone together. As always, when a budding relationship had positive results, the counsellors didn't interfere.

"It's like I finally realize I don't need my parents together, to be happy. And trying to find my birth parents is just a secondary need. My happiness is only made by me and no one else," Ezra said.

"How did you come to this epiphany?" Peter asked.

"It was something Brandy explained. She went through the same thing I'm going through right now. Difference is my parents hid it from me, her's used her to get back at each other. But she pointed out that I'm not defined by them. We are all responsible for our own happiness. When she realized that, she knew she could start to heal."

"Yes, she is right."

"It was Sophie who helped her get to that point. I can't fix my parents, they need to fix themselves. But it's okay if they fix themselves and remain apart," Ezra added.

They talked some more and Peter finally began to see that Ezra was looking forward to the future. He was making plans for himself, no matter what adult called themself his parent. This progress was long overdue.

Next was his session with Daisy. She was much more quiet and sullen, than the previous sessions. Peter wondered if the shift in Ezra's attention, effected Daisy much more than she wanted to admit. As much as they taught them how to handle life, everyone had to find their own way. This new feeling Daisy was going through, might be just the jolt she needed to break her shell.

While Peter was having his one on one with Daisy, the rest of the Cliff Hangers were doing homework. As usual Chris sat down between Shelby and Scott to work on math. She jumped when they both put a hand on her thigh. She stuttered and blushed. Her mind left the equation in front of her and focused on those hands. A sexual shiver climbed from where their hands touched her all the way up her spine.

"Why… what are you guys doing?" Chris whispered breathlessly.

"We've seen how you look at us. Whom is it you want?" Scott asked.

Shelby waited to see if Chris would answer or get up and leave. As fun as the teasing game was, they wouldn't let her bolt and avoid like usual. She watched her friend's face. You could see the inner struggle if you knew what to look for like she did.

"There is no wrong answer, I promise," Shelby encouraged.

Chris practically whispered her answer, taking a step into the unknown. "Both, but…"

"No buts allowed… well you know what I mean," Shelby said as Chris giggled nervously. "When you and Scott go for your usual run, I'll come along. Maybe we can explore this a little, would you like that?"

"Really, can we? I mean, are you sure you both want to share?" Chris asked timidly. "I don't want to wreck our friendships."

Scott answered, "you're not just anyone. We both care about you and understand what you've been through. If being with us in any way helps you find who you are, then just go with it."

Chris looked into Shelby's eyes, her heart screaming through them. "I've never felt this for anyone, let alone two people. It excites me and scares me all at once."

Shelby nodded, "that's how I felt, when Scott and I truly connected. When we both stopped hiding our feelings."

"Me too, when she didn't run after I told her about the demons that hunted me. But facing that fear, is rewarding. Just telling someone the truth of what you feel, that alone is amazing," Scott admitted and shared a loving look with his girlfriend.

The moment was interrupted when Auggie and Jules sat down at their table. "Hi guys, you working on math homework?"

The three of them nodded and everyone got back to the math. Peter joined his team when Daisy's session was over. "Scott and Chris, when you go for your run, take the path out to the rope course. The one you usually take is under repair, courtesy of the Ridge Runners."

"Peter is it okay if I go with them?" Shelby asked, not giving any reason why she wanted to.

"Anyone else want to go for a killer run?" Scott invited, before Peter could answer.

"Hell no," Auggie and Jules said in unison, then laughed.

"Not me either," Ezra clarified.

"I'm not going to punish myself," Daisy added.

Peter shrugged, "alright, just take it easy out there Shelby. Scott, you and Chris don't push her too hard and don't leave her behind either."

"We know. I'm just glad someone else wants to help Scott train."

Jules scrunched up her nose in distaste, "I'd help him, but not running."

Auggie said, "when you come back, I'll spot you on the weights."

Scott grinned, "thanks man. You girls meet me by the wood pile in ten minutes."

Peter warned, "remember what I said Scott, don't push Shelby to keep up too hard. I don't want her getting injured out there."

"I'll make sure he doesn't," Chris said.

They left and met back up at the wood pile. Chris was glad that they chose to run for a while, before taking a break. Running relaxed her, she could control it. They stopped near the rope course, Chris passed around a water bottle, from her fanny pack.

"We didn't go too fast for you right Shelby?"

"Nope. I enjoyed the view from behind you two," Shelby smirked.

The three of them were a little hot and sweaty. Scott pulled Shelby down to the ground beside him and they began kissing. Chris felt awkward, but when she turned to leave, Shelby stopped her.

"Ready to explore those feelings of yours?" She didn't wait for an answer, but moved over and pulled Chris down between her and Scott.

First they both kissed Chris on her neck and then each took turns kissing her mouth. As they all got turned on, Chris just let herself go. She touched, as they did. Then the two girls, teamed up on Scott, removing his t-shirt and exploring his abs with their lips. Shelby put Chris's hand on Scott's crotch and made her feel his desire.

Chris sat up, "I'm sorry… I can't. You two drive me crazy with need… but I can't." She stood up.

"Why? What's holding you back? The rules here?" Shelby pushed. "Come on tell us the truth."

Tears ran down her face, as they watched Chris struggle with herself. Scott stood up and went to stand in front of her. He reached his hand out to Chris. "Don't run away."

"You guys are making me feel… not just desire for sex, but I want to take that leap into the unknown with you both. I'm terrified that if I do, I won't survive. We cannot be a three and I won't get between you two."

"You wouldn't. And who says we can't be a three?" Shelby asked.

Scott said, "one of my favourite quotes is from Ivan E. Coyote. He said 'I am a rare species, not a stereotype.' I think that explains it all."

Chris put her hands over her face, undecided what to do. Scott took her into his arms and just held her. He nodded over at Shelby and she did the same. They stood there a few moments, just holding Chris.

"I'm okay…. you guys know I'm messed up, sorry I killed the mood," Chris sighed.

"Let's get on with our run. It'll calm you down. Just know, that if you want to experience more, just ask or let one of us know."

She nodded and off they jogged, then ten minutes later she blurted, "I'm attracted to Peter too."

"I tried to kiss Sophie once. That was a huge mistake," Scott admitted. "I'm wiser now."

"That was misplaced attraction. Peter is safe, maybe that's why you want us too?" Shelby asked.

"Yes and no. You two just ooze sex. You're both hot. Other than Mike, I haven't wanted to have sex with anyone in years. Until now. But because you're my friends first, I guess it's not just about the sex. Am I explaining this right?"

"Yes, just fine. Take it easy, one leap at a time. What's the rush?"

Chris looked at Scott, "I don't know. No rush I guess… but tell that to my hormones!"

They slowed down, now much closer to the end of the path back. Scott, took the hands of both girls, stopping them. He kissed Shelby and then kissed Chris deeply too. Shelby planted a soft kiss on both too.

"Thank you both, for sharing those kisses in the woods with me. I'm honoured." He flashed them his smile.

"We're honoured you want us both," Shelby added.

"I don't deserve you guys." Chris smiled, "race you the rest of the way!" She took off and Scott chased after her.

Shelby refused to take the bait. "You two are nuts!" She shouted after them, walking the rest of the way.


End file.
